To think how sex is usually portrayed in TV/Film between women and men is awful?

[abacucat]

Yes there are exceptions, but most TV and Film portray sex between a women and man as a bit of kissing/snogging and then penetration. That is it. I know if that is how I had sex I would never orgasm at all. It seems as if TV and Film are largely unaware of all the different kind of things a woman and man can do in sex.

[Osirus]

This is often how we do it. We don’t have the opportunity much (demanding toddler) and when we do we just have a quick snog and get on with it.

Finish together too. DH can hold off better than me so it’s easy for us.

Sounds like we’re the exception and that’s fine, I’m happy with that!

[abacucat]

That is fine, but it is rare. We know from surveys that it is rare. But virtually all sex scenes show this.
And it is rare because of biology.

[LeftRightCentre]

All the women who have sex with their bras on. Yeah, right.

[ForalltheSaints]

No discussion ever about contraception and safer sex in such scenes, and people keeping clothes on that would not occur in real life in the situations portrayed.

[Toyboysrus]

Yes Lichtie, if they just want us to know that the main characters have moved along their relationship to a sexual one there's no need to drag it out and take up valuable time they could be murdering or bank robbing or kidnapping or whatever the main plot is supposed to be.

[RatRolyPoly]

And no-one's baby ever wakes up halfway through, their toddler never walks in, they never get half way through and say "you know what love, I'm fucking knackered, can you just finish yourself off and i'll put one on your tab for another time?". Never happens!

[Djnoun]

I say you can't beat a good bit of PIV.

[Overyou]

When I read your op I thought, what’s wrong with that? Prefer it that way myself .

[WitsEnding]

Agree it's all about PIV for me too once things get physical - although getting each other in the right frame of mind is important. I tend to regard foreplay as mostly about finding the correct alignment.

[abacucat]

Are all those saying they prefer that way women? And do you orgasm?

[Annandale]

Tends to be mostly straight to PIV for me in the past but that's because I wasn't going to come, so increasingly felt whatevs. So it's realistic in that sense. Also tbh on telly both tend to look completely unmoved which also seemed quite realistic...

[Allineedyoutodois]

Yeah, it’s pants! I’ve never slept with a bloke and I have to say tv hetie sex makes me feel like i’ve Dodged a bullet!

[Fluffyears]

Outlander is terrible for it. Just leave a wee bit to the imagination ffs and Claire is always away within 3-4 thrusts. It’s a bit too graphic and shows abysmal straight in sex.

[EyeDrops]

I do agree that it's mostly unrealistic, but I also understand from a drama & appropriateness point of view.

It's fairly easy to 'show' a couple having sex (PIV) without actually showing much - mostly under covers, bit of thrusting, etc. How would you show foreplay, woman orgasming first, etc, without being pretty explicit? I don't think I'd feel as comfortable watching that in the middle of a tv series. Has no bearing on my own relationship or preferences.

I'm more irritated by the fact the woman's bra is always still on afterwards!

[BirdieInTheHand]

Yep all about the PIV for me too. I enjoy foreplay but it's just build up to the main event. Always orgasm and much better with PIV than oral.

[abacucat]

Okay well, unless you are all men, you are unusual. Most women do not orgasm through PIV. And that is because your clitoris is not in your vagina.

[abacucat]

Tends to be mostly straight to PIV for me in the past but that's because I wasn't going to come, so increasingly felt whatevs. So it's realistic in that sense. Also tbh on telly both tend to look completely unmoved which also seemed quite realistic...

Annandale, that is sad, but I suspect not that unusual.

[Overyou]

All women are different. I’ve seen lots of threads like this and some women need a lot of foreplay and some don’t and some orgasm from PIV and some don’t.

[Jeanclaudejackety]

My friend once described a sex scene in a film we were watching as "zero to penetration in 60 seconds"

[abacucat]

Overyou Surveys of thousands of women show that most women do not orgasm through PIV. I am not saying it because it is my opinion.

[Helmetbymidnight]

Film and tv are male dominated industries. From writing to production to ...everything:
Until that changes, we’ll mostly keep getting young women wildly climactic from merely looking at aging lothario.

[abacucat]

Yes! I can't stand the beautiful young women paired with older men that would have no chance of being with a woman like that in real life.

[YourDaughter]

I have to agree I prefer PIV orgasms, much better than any other kind. Depending on how horny I am, I don’t need foreplay at all.
Sometimes I need a little, but once PIV starts I’m away. Like a pp my DH is good at holding back.
I can’t imagine being at foreplay for 20 mins or more, I’d have orgasmed, got bored and probably cold by then (being naked and all!).
Whilst films don’t provide a good insight of all the different ways women enjoy sex, I think we need to take care not to do the same here. Rather than saying film sex should be more about foreplay as that’s what women like, we should see variety of ways of women enjoying sex otherwise we are just the same as film makers.

OP you refer to lots of survey evidence; do you know what the sampling was like for these? Just curious as to realistically how representative of the wider female population they are.

[thighofrelief]

It took me a while to figure out what PIV meant, i was thinking I had missed out on something completely new. But I get what you mean now! There is one sex scene in a film that I really love. They are kissing and she takes off his watch and flings it away while he laughs. Then we see her very pretty foot going under the covers. Next scene they are lying there cuddling and chatting. I got it that they had done the deed and taken their time about it.

[abacucat]

Yourdaughter It was thousands of women. So very good sampling. I am not saying that no women orgasm from penetrative sex, I ma saying those women are in the minority. But you wouldn't know it from looking at the media.