To think this “hilarious” card is actually depressing?

[Decanter]

lovelayladesigns.co.uk/Cards/Anniversary_Cards/up-the-bum.html

I have 2 DDs and hate how this kind of crap is being normalised. Fucking hilarious Layla

Obviously any sort of sex between informed consenting adults is fine. But the “normalization” (for want of a better word) of anal sex means that teenage girls are being told that they are “pearl clutching” or prudish If they don’t want to do it. And girls should always be free to say no to anything. And there is an undeniable increased risk of short and long term injury. Whatever the cool girls*
say.
*People don’t like being called “cool girls”. So I never use it. Until someone says “pearl clutching”.

Meh. The phrase has been around for years, I assumed the no harm done bit refers to pregnancy.

What people do in their own lives is up to them. The card is in public, open to everyone.
I think it's in bad taste, a bit ick. Women have been pressured, including by that rhyme for generations. I think it's not v feminist

I buy LoveLayla cards all the time, I find them funny. They’re not always PC and if you’re a bit of a snowflake don’t buy one.

Girls/women have been coerced into sex and told they're prudish or frigid by some men since the dawn of time. The sex acts themselves aren't the problem.

When I was a teenager back in the 80s the humorous cards had pictures of men with massive shlongs.

Tacky infantile rubbish.

Nobody is calling folk pearl clutchers or prudish for not wanting to do anal sex??? They are being called that because they are judgy as hell about consenting adults getting enjoyment out of it. Big difference.

Regardless of what 'type' of sex someone enjoys they shouldn't feel forced into it by anyone. But neither should those who do so consensually be made to feel disgusting ffs

Anal sex may be normalised by porn and be an issue.

But I can guarantee you, with 100% conviction that no one, ever in the history of anything, went online, found this card website, searched the anniversary section, located this card and did any of the following

:Send it to their significant other to signal consent for anal.
:Use the card as a rape apologists excuse for anally raping someone
:Send it to a teenager to pressure them into doing something they don't want to do
:Use the card to promote anal sex in any way shape or form as being the norm and denoting everyone else as prudish

I can stake anything you like on that, so sure is my conviction.

I'm all for making sure that positive messages about consent and sex are passed down to our young people. But OP you called this wrong and the band wagoners did too. Please don't mass mail a small company to complain about this just because you don't like the card.

I imagine their sales will see a massive spike over the next week or so. Do they pay you commission, OP?

BertrandRussell what you’ve described about girls being called prudish etc if they won’t have or disagree with anal sex is true and very depressing. Hell it’s happening on this thread. The pro-anal posters calling out the anti-anal posters as snowflakes and pearl clutchers.

Hang on...re read some of the comments from the anti-anal crowd towards anybody who says they enjoy it or see no issue with it. Hypocrite much

“Girls/women have been coerced into sex and told they're prudish or frigid by some men since the dawn of time. The sex acts themselves aren't the problem.”

Just because something has happened since the dawn of time doesn’t make it a good thing or means we should perpetuate it. We should be teaching our daughters how to say no to anything they don’t want ti fo. And anal sex is much more likely to result in short or long term injuries for the woman, particularly if the man is clumsy, inexperienced and has learnt about it from porn.
And if course the card won’t make anyone go out and “do” it. But many tiny things make a culture. And as someone once said, if we ignore all the tiny drips, we’ll suddenly be faced with a massive overflowing bucket.

I don't care what two consenting adults do together, but that card and other stuff on sale and in the media are contributing to a normalisation of a practice that is potentially harmful. Don't statistics show that anal sex has become the norm as a first time experience for young girls? More than likely performed by boys who don't have the knowledge or the sense to take care. Lots of men now have an expectation of anal because it's become so mainstream, but lots of women don't like it/find it painful.
I don't find the card funny at all but I admit i did snurkle at a pp saying 'anal certainly it's normal in her circle'

The pro-anal posters calling out the anti-anal posters as snowflakes and pearl clutchers.

Name calling isn’t ok (either side). However, the ‘anti-anal’ argument on here is weak at best, homophobic in the worst comments. The ‘but teenage girls will be pressured into it’ and ‘porn is to blame for it all’ argument don’t hold much weight, when this practice has been going on millennia, sadly along with pressuring women into sexual acts.

Anal sex is as ‘unnatural’ as any sex act that isn’t to procreate (biologically speaking), that doesn’t make it wrong or disgusting as long as it’s consensual. Is there plans for it to be discussed as part of sex education in schools? Keeping it ‘taboo’ is what leads to pressures, injuries and I’ll thoug out comments like on this thread.

Jesus it's a card, don't buy it if you are offended. If I sent this to my husband he'd laugh! I didn't realise it was so taboo?

Is that really true? That anal is the norm for a first time experience now? That really does shock me.

Well if someone said it on mumsnet it must be true!

Each to their own, yadda yadda - the card that I thought was particularly grim was the one that said, 'After this bottle of wine the bum is still out of bounds' which perpetuates that depressing 'joke' about a man trying to get a woman pissed so he can do something sexual she doesn't want.

They're not cards I'd want to send or receive. I guess some people never grow out of yelling BUM TWAT FANNY and laughing hysterically.

Deadringer I missed that, and on a re-read, smirked too. Just to be clear, I’m not offended by this type of humour. I find however the normalisation of this potentially dangerous practice thoroughly depressing. I hate that as a consequence, men may and do try to convince/coerce young girls and women into doing it, and as this thread shows, plenty of other women will be quick to label them uptight, frigid, pearl clutchers and snowflakes if they disagree with it or choose not to do it. The previous poster who called it all out as not very feminist was spot on.

I knew this would be a love Layla card before I even opened the thread some of their cards are fine but a lot of them a just grim. I hate the birth congratulations cards that say “my thoughts are with your vagina at this time” there are others that have been worse but of course I cant recall them when I need to!

Anal sex is such a new thing, it's only been around since Ancient Greek times.

I best not let you lot see our valentines cards

I think it's funny, if you don't like it don't buy it it's that simple 🤷🏻‍♀️. Nothing to get your knickers in a twist over

Presumably they'd only be bought and sent between friends/partners who would enjoy the sentiment. So no harm done then.