To think I can attend a work do 3 weeks after baby is born?

[CarlottiJames]

We have a work do organised for 5 ish weeks after my due date. If baby comes late, that 5 turns in to 3. I've paid £60 for this event as has everyone else. It was booked well in advance before I even knew I was pregnant.

I desperately want to go, even if it's just for food for a couple of hours. I haven't had a baby before and don't know whether this is a naive thought? I could get my dad or mum to take baby out (it's a daytime thing) and she would be round the corner, but will be breastfeeding so not sure how I would work this out...

Any ideas? I'm fretting. It sounds silly because it's only a work do but it cost a lot of money and it's also important for me to keep in touch with the team etc.

AIBU to think this is doable? Am I worrying over nothing?

Can you go with baby with you ? Maximum I could leave baby at that age was 2 hours or 3 if I expressed. But I wasnt ready to leave him with others.

I was happily attending everything though with baby with me.

U might be a little sore but otherwise it’s doable

This will be hard and mostly because of feeding complications. In the first few weeks cluster feeding is very likely and being away from your baby for several hours just not possible. Nevermind that you may feel absolutely exhausted from the major life adjustment and sleepless nights. I don't think you can call it until you are nearer the time, heck even the day. No two days were the same for me.

I went to a work do a week after I gave birth but the baby came with me 😁

I went to a friends baby shower for 2 hours when DS was 2 weeks old. I fed him before I went and he stayed at home with DH, it was hard leaving him but I knew he wouldn’t starve in 2 hours.

Are you local to a Nottingham? If so I may have some breastfeeding support options for you.

If the meal is in the day time/ early evening then could you go fo a few hours and someone bring baby and sit in a cafe round the corner in case you are needed?

My dd was 18 days late and I was in hospital for 5 days after an emcs, so at 5 weeks post due date I wouldn’t have wanted to be anywhere other than at home with my dd.
Other people will have stories of bouncing out of hospital and being able to revert to an almost normal existence within hours.
So I genuinely have no idea if YABU

I could have but no way would I have wanted to leave her that soon. Everyone is different I guess.

I left my emcs ebf baby at 2 weeks and 1 day old to go to a football match that was really important to my older dc. I expressed a couple of ounces, fed the baby at the last minute and my amazing dh was happy to manage as best he could. In the end she fell asleep soon after I went and he woke her after about 2 hours to give her the bottle which she took like a dream and I was home shortly after that with very sore boobs and an aching csection scar where I ran back to the car in my haste to get back to her! It was fine and fun but 2.5 hours was my absolute limit. She was my 4th and I was pretty chilled tho.

I was a zombie at 3 weeks. Recovering from a rough csection and dealing with a barely sleeping baby. A work outing would have been impossible.

I’ve also known women who 24 hours after birth were basically back to normal.

No way to predict where you will fall in the spectrum.

As long as you're not hang-gliding or something I can't see a problem. With our first I attended a formal Mess function when she was a week old, she slept in a bedroom and I was able to go in a feed her, we also used to take her to our favourite restaurant where she slept in mer carrycot on top of a chest freezer! Your child shouldn't dictate your life any more than necessary!

I have a 5 week old and just based on the fact I haven't got the time to express much milk because she feeds so often and that she doesn't have a pattern of feeding yet, I wouldn't be able to go and leave her because there wouldn't be anyone else to feed her. If I ever have the time to express, I could. The birth is one thing to take into consideration but in my opinion feeding is an issue particularly the first few weeks.

How do you know it will be 3 weeks old? Full term is 37-42 weeks. Could it be even younger then?
I couldn't have left mine that young. I just didn't want to.
Dc1 was easy and perfect and I never wanted him out of my sight.
Dc2 was in hospital poorly at 2 weeks old.
Dc3 I was not physically well enough to be out in the first few weeks.
So my answer is no.

By the way, I still haven't left my 6 month old for that long.

Personally would only go if baby was with me.

If Youre really keen to be there you probably could be. I had a seriously traumatic delivery (forceps & extended episiotomy, back to back 10lb9oz baby, enough blood loss to need a transfusion then infected wound, burst stitches, ugh!) and still went to my best friend’s wedding 3 weeks post partum. That said, I was still bleeding like a stuck pig and couldn’t bear to sit on both bum cheeks at the same time, and friends knew how I was and let me go for several lie-downs in their v snazzy bridal suite. If it’s people you don’t adore and know well enough to discuss gory details with, probably not bearable!

Depends.
There’s no automatic confinement or requirement to stay home
But you’ll receive a tsunami of indignant responses aghast that you dare go out. On mn if the baby isn’t velcroed to you and breastfeed 24-7 you're deemed to be lacking and a bad mother
I went out shortly after birth and I really needed me,adult time,not talking about babies. Time with adults who knew me and didn’t solely define me as mum

If you have a straight forward birth - yes you will be fine. If not then perhaps not. Just depends how you feel! I would have been too knackered 3 weeks post delivery but that's not to say you will be x

I would have been fine after a c section to go, my recovery was unusually quick though luckily. I know others aren't

I did a wedding 7 weeks after a planned c section leaving baby from 12-11pm but brought to me for one breastfeed in the middle. He was mixed fed by then. It was a ball ache. I wouldn’t have minded 3-4 hours though.

I don't know, best see when the time comes. Each woman is affected differently.
I bled heavily for 12 weeks and had a heartbeat in my ear plus pnd so wouldn't have been my cup of tea.
Thank God we're all different.

First baby I couldn’t have gone, I could barely walk by then and was really mentally ill..

Second kid we went for our works do when baby was one week old! Had a brilliant time

I was 16 days overdue.

I went to the shop on my own when DD was about 6 weeks old. I ran home in a total panic as couldn’t cope without her.

I think I took DD out for lunch with work around 3w old, I had a csection but someone came and picked me up. Lunch is okay, an evening out would be a whole different ball game but daytime is a lot easier to manage logistically.

The feeding is more likely to be a potential hindrance to you attending I would say. In my experience feeding both of my children was absolutely hellish in the first few weeks. I ended up feeding expressed milk due to failure to latch, tongue tie, tight face muscles, you name it... So was either attached to a pump, feeding baby, doing nappies or trying to wash, feed and toilet myself! I love the naivety of presuming you'll ebf, great intentions though! And even if baby does feed like a dream very quickly, there is no routine that early, often with very long feeds and unpredictable cluster feeds. Honestly I think work will be the last thing on your mind. Good luck!

Depends how things go. I was in hospital for 17 days after DS was born

You'll be able to go but you won't want to. You'll want to snuggle at home with your tiny baby and you certainly won't want yo go out and leave her.

Haahhpy not necessarily. You might have felt like that, other people want to get out and socialise with other adults.