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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

DH is obsessed with NDN’s cat

227 replies

Crazycatmanhelp · 02/10/2018 08:12

Our neighbour’s cat has started pooing in our garden. We’re not really sure why as we’ve lived here for 2 1/2 years and it’s only started doing it in the last few months. I find it irritating but as someone who grew up with cats accept its par for the course.

Anyway my DH has become obsessed with stopping this cat from pooing in the garden. He stares at the garden waiting for the cat to make an appearance so he can run out and chase it off. He’s bought a high pitched cat deterrent thing and sprayed lemon juice on the grass, neither of which work. I caught him hammering nails into the fence the other day so the cat would injure itself when jumping up which I made him take down. He’s made himself late for work waiting for the cat so be can scare it. He talks about it every day, calls me from work to ask for updates on the cat (I’m in Mat leave).

It sounds ridiculous but his obsession with this cat is really getting me down. He is otherwise a wonderful husband and father. But I hate this nasty streak he’s showing. The glee on his face when he terrifies this poor cat is unpleasant. He’s even talked jokingly about how he’d love it to accidentally get run over by a car.

I’ve tried talking to him about it but he says he doesn’t want poo in the garden for the DC to potentially step in which I understand but this behaviour still isn’t normal surely?

AIBU to be annoyed by his behaviour? What do I do?!

OP posts:
SoyDora · 02/10/2018 17:43

Well at least my dog is only making my own house smell I guess. He doesn’t shit in other people’s gardens 🤷🏻‍♀️. No one else has to clean up after my dog.

Shambu · 02/10/2018 17:46

It's the mentality of cat haters that's extraordinary. TBH I've only ever come across this kind of barmy mindset on MN. Some posters hate everything - cats, people, weddings etc.

I've never had a neighbours' cat damage anything of mine, nor have I ever heard of anyone having something damaged by someone else's cat.

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 17:48

Shambu I am merely stating that I resent having to pick up multiple cat shits from my garden every single day (those cat shits that you said cats bury). How is that in any way unreasonable? I don’t want to pick up the shit of other people’s pets. I pick up after my own dog.

Shambu · 02/10/2018 17:49

Your dog will shit in the street and in the park even if you clear it up. And if you let him off the leash in a park, he could run off and shit somewhere and you wouldn't even see it.

Crazycatmanhelp · 02/10/2018 17:49

Wow this post got a lot more attention that I was expecting! Apologies for ignoring it all day but have been run ragged by DC.

To answer a few questions that came up:

He is not usually a cruel or sadistic person. In nearly 10 years he has been perfectly lovely so I’d be surprised if this was indeed his true colours - 10 years is quite a long time to put on an act surely?

I don’t think he really wants to hurt the cat I think it’s just an obsession that’s got out of hand and as many have said he now wants to win at all costs. I’m going to sit him down tonight and explain that it has got out of hand, it has to stop, if there is a deeper rooted problem I am here for him and if the nasty behaviour continues I won’t put up with it. I also adore cats, I had cats all my life until I left home and the thought of one being injured due to my DH makes me feel sick. Please don’t think I condone this behaviour in any way.

Midlife crisis... he’s 29?!

I am not a dog person so getting one is out of the question!

The cat is pooing in the middle of the lawn, not flower beds. I have seen it do it many times.

I would gladly speak to the neighbours but what can they do? You can’t control a cat in terms of where it goes to the loo if it’s an outdoors cat.

I’ve ordered a water pistol on amazon prime. Also read online about putting a water/vinegar mix in because cats hate vinegar, any experiences of this?

OP posts:
SoyDora · 02/10/2018 17:53

Shambu yes it shits in the street very occasionally which I pick up (he usually goes in the garden). It is only allowed off the lead in my friend’s private field (beagle who can’t be trusted in public places as he follows his nose).
Again, how is me resenting picking up multiple stinking cat shits, from a cat I don’t own, unreasonable?

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 17:54

Can’t be trusted not to run away in public places I mean.

Crazycatmanhelp · 02/10/2018 17:54

Also not sure who mentioned it but... truly disappointed in myself to have overlooked the opportunity for a pussy joke in the thread title! Live and learn.

OP posts:
AmateurSwami · 02/10/2018 17:54

Cats usually bury their poo, so your child is unlikely to step in it unless they're walking in the flower bed.

Wtf, that’s absolute bollocks. Cats shit anywhere, it’s never buried in my garden by neighbours cats, or my cat-owning friends gardens. It’s so vile. I hate having to deal with animal shit when I don’t have animals. I have a huge phobia of it and it ruins my week.

Shambu · 02/10/2018 17:57

How is that in any way unreasonable

I've never said it was unreasonable any more than is my dislike of dog shit in the streets.

Have you tried an ultrasonic cat repellent?

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 17:58

Have you tried an ultrasonic cat repellent?

Yes.

BlueJava · 02/10/2018 18:01

How strange - especially making himself late for work, that's very bizarre. Perhaps it is something to do with projecting his dislike of the NDN on to the cat, however if he calls I'd refuse to discuss it with him. I'd be nice about it then (No I'm not discussing he cat, you're obsessed, ha ha... do you want to hear what your DC did) if he persisted by being a bit outrageous (The cat pooed on your wing mirror - no just joking really). to the rude (Shut the fuck up about the bloody cat, get more in your life than NDN's fur bag!).

Shambu · 02/10/2018 18:03

Then I can't help you.

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 18:05

That’s fine, I didn’t ask for your help Hmm. Just gave an opinion that if people can’t stop their pet shitting in someone else’s garden, they shouldn’t own that pet.
Just my opinion.

Myimaginarycathasfleas · 02/10/2018 18:07

I've never had a neighbours' cat damage anything of mine, nor have I ever heard of anyone having something damaged by someone else's cat.

Next door’s cat leapt onto the rim of my nice big paddling pool whilst trying to stalk a bird, and punctured it. It also likes to sharpen its claws on our rattan garden furniture.

Just as well we like our neighbours, because we hate their cat!

KTheGrey · 02/10/2018 18:07

Tiger poo?

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 18:08

Just to be clear, I also think disgusting dog owners who don’t pick up after their dogs shouldn’t own them either.

Shambu · 02/10/2018 18:12

You'd agree then if I said dogs should only be allowed to shit within the owners home, if not they shouldn't own a dog.

(I wouldn't say anything so stupid, clearly).

Not everyone clears up dog shit, and shitting in the street is ick even if it is picked up. (If the poo's a bit soft some of it gets left behind).

Shambu · 02/10/2018 18:13

Just to be clear, I also think disgusting dog owners who don’t pick up after their dogs shouldn’t own them either.

Xpost - not sure how you'd enforce that one.

AmateurSwami · 02/10/2018 18:14

if I said dogs should only be allowed to shit within the owners home, if not they shouldn't own a dog.

Sounds fucking ideal

Shambu · 02/10/2018 18:16

Sounds fucking ideal

I know right.

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 18:17

I’m not sure how you would enforce it either. I just don’t believe anyone should have to pick up the shit of someone else’s pet.

SoyDora · 02/10/2018 18:19

^ and I have to do exactly that every single day.

abbsisspartacus · 02/10/2018 18:23

How short is your lawn? My neighbours cat will only poop in longish grass he doesn't do it after it's been cut

Cheap plastic carrier bags on sticks cats hate them they make sudden non predictable noise and movement disrupts the cat making them feel uncomfortable so they are less likely to poo there

thornyhousewife · 02/10/2018 18:40

I'm with your OH. Cats are the worst.

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