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AIBU?

To wonder who buys this shite?!

165 replies

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 19:50

Gwyneth Paltrow has opened a store for her Goop shite...

The £145 necklace vibrator has obviously shot straight to the number one spot of my Christmas list.

And also the pube oil - I can just image DH’s face if he walked in as I was oiling my pubes Grin

www.buzzfeed.com/laurasilver/gwyneth-paltrow-has-opened-a-goop-shop-in-london-and-its?bfsource=bbf_enuk

OP posts:
RickOShay · 25/09/2018 19:52

Grin
Somebody somewhere will
I just can’t imagine who

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 20:01

I can’t either rick. I’m all for keeping your chuff happy and to you’re own liking but I draw a line at throwing a crystal up there for good hormones Shock

OP posts:
CSIblonde · 25/09/2018 20:15

Tryingtoswallow
'I draw the line at throwing a crystal up there'. That made me snort & my sip of tea went down the wrong way!

MrsEfff · 25/09/2018 20:17

FUR OIL 😂

Bluelonerose · 25/09/2018 20:19

Why would anyone want to wear a sex toy as a necklace?
I can't imagine doing the school run with the rabbit nestled between my boobs wiggling away!

No wonder prices are higher in London if that's the shit you can buy

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 20:25

Ahh now Blue I think I have the answer to that...

You know sometimes you’re out and about, say doing a big shop in Asda, down the frozen aisle. And all of a sudden you must wank?? Like an orgasm is needed after pursuing the chicken and then you remember you forgot to pack your buzzing buddy??

No?

Just me then Wink

OP posts:
SteveMcGarrettsBudgieSmugglers · 25/09/2018 20:28

almost worth growing the fur to use the fur oil

I will be going for the cheaper Rampant rabbit on a rope, rather than the gold vibe necklace

HerRoyalFattyness · 25/09/2018 20:28

Fantastic Grin

Although it does say they've been fined for saying the fanny eggs can give you good foof juju

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 20:41

Ahh Steve very classy alternative there Grin

I’m honestly still Shock at it - I don’t know what’s appalling me most - the cost, the names or just the sheer audacity of the pretentious cow to sell this utter tripe.

It almost makes her ‘consciously uncoupling’ seem like a normal person term Hmm

Still going to ask DH for that necklace mind Grin

OP posts:
Sparklesocks · 25/09/2018 20:44

Gullible rich women basically!

Bluelonerose · 25/09/2018 20:57

GrinGrin dying of laughter here

SteveMcGarrettsBudgieSmugglers · 25/09/2018 21:19

I personally think a cadburys creme egg thrown up the chuff will balance my hormones far better than a crystal one, or maybe if I was feeling fancy a kinder surprise, chocolate and a toy

HerRoyalFattyness · 25/09/2018 21:20

steve i find kinder surprise may be a littke big, and also quite flimsy, so would break too easily.
Stick with the creme eggs.

TheHauntedFishtank · 25/09/2018 21:20

‘Good foof juju’ Grin Grin

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 21:30

Steve Grin you must open your own Goop! I imagine a lot more women would find it relatable!!

You may want to take on HerRoyals advice re: flimsy kinder suprise mind.

OP posts:
BreakfastAtSquiffanys · 25/09/2018 21:35

Do you chuck the crystal up there before are after you steam your chuff?

(isn't fanny steaming another Gwynnie thing?)

AnoukSpirit · 25/09/2018 21:40

If you haven't already, you definitely need to read Jennifer Gunter's blog posts about Goop. Grin

longwayoff · 25/09/2018 21:45

I'm so glad I'm old and have no interest whatsoever in finding my Christmas presents up my fanny. Ooh santaSmile

Rebecca36 · 25/09/2018 21:46

Quite revolting. How Gwyneth Paltrow can publicise such rubbish in her name is quite beyond me.

longwayoff · 25/09/2018 21:50

I'm having real trouble trying to imagine an average day in the life of Ms P beginning with her waking and standing over the kettle. Er ouch.

SteveMcGarrettsBudgieSmugglers · 25/09/2018 21:51

HerRoyal I going to use a small one not a maxi Kinder eyes watering at the thought

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 21:52

Yes breakfast gywnnie is all about the steaming. I imagine you steam the bad away from your fanny and then add the crystal in for good in your fanny. She’s all about balance this one!

Anouk off to google 👍🏻

OP posts:
AlrightBabby · 25/09/2018 21:52

Holy shite!! Just when you think you've heard it all 🤯

Tryingtoswallow101 · 25/09/2018 21:54

And yes longway it can’t be comfortable.

I do wonder why she is so obsessed with fanny balance.

I feel like I have use the word fanny enough for the week now!

OP posts:
OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 25/09/2018 21:58

Bet you can get a buzzer on a chain from Wish for a quid.

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