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Original poster

Shitty homemade Christmas Gifts

441 replies

justilou1 · 22/09/2018 00:37

I’m really loving the homemade Christmas gifts thread, and am watching it for inspiration. Can we start one for ideas for things to avoid - ie glitter-encrusted his&hers champagne flutes.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
MereDintofPandiculation · 22/09/2018 11:39

I love anything you get me. As it means you thought of me and wanted to get me a present. This! The worst presents I've had in recent years are from adult DC who have thought hard about what I'd like, then got it a bit wrong and got me something that actually unusable. But which I value anyway because of the thought that has gone into it.

CrazyDogLady87 · 22/09/2018 11:44

@steppemum
there has been one or two about a regular xmas cake not the bean tin ones, I shop at Tesco, however, I buy my baking goods through a wholesaler for my catering business

BasicUsername · 22/09/2018 12:08

@Magpiefeather

If someone made me a patchwork quilt I would be very very grateful! So much work goes in to them.

WickedGoodDoge · 22/09/2018 12:09

I am happy to receive any sort of homemade food present. I love food. Especially homemade truffles. Especially truffles. Or fudge. Or brownies. Or chocolate bark. Anything involving a lot of sugar, really. Grin

I’d rather not receive anything craftlike. We have too many bits and pieces dotted about the house as it is and DH keeps the house at about 1992002 degrees so I don’t wear sweaters, hand knit or otherwise.

wrenika · 22/09/2018 12:10

You'd all hate me...I make 99% of my christmas gifts. I only gift to my grandma, my parents, my old childminder who is as much a gran as my real gran, PIL, and my partner. I buy my parents a bottle of gin and whisky, and with my partner who just set a price limit and pick things we actually want. Then I make jam, tablet, and whatever other sweet things I fancy to package up nicely and gift. The jam particularly goes down well, especially with PIL.

I don't actually like christmas and there's no way in hell you'll get me out there christmas shopping....but I enjoy cooking so will continue my edible gifts. So thumbs nose

gendercritter · 22/09/2018 12:16

This thread Grin

I got given a hand-knitted jumper at 15. It was lime green. Virtually flourescent. I was fat and spotty and the jumper nearly tipped me over the edge.

I love Christmas cake. I will definitely be making baked bean cakes this year. Genius!

Isentthesignal · 22/09/2018 12:29

My friend bought her boyfriend a brand new car but to make it a bit more thoughtful - she attended night classes to make him a personalised keyring!

Hanyu · 22/09/2018 12:32

My friend bought her boyfriend a brand new car but to make it a bit more thoughtful - she attended night classes to make him a personalised keyring!

😂

A friend of mine told the story of how her MIL was always giving them handmade quilts. After the 8th one, they had to plead no more.

SaucyJack · 22/09/2018 12:36

“ "hey, I made that! Right biatch, you're getting fuck all this year, see how you like that" ”

Exactly what sort of punishment do you think that would be? It’s like sending your teen to their room for the afternoon- when they’ve got their phone, their Xbox, and half a tube of Pringles stashed down the side of the bed to keep them entertained.

People don’t want this shit. That’s literally the point. You can’t expect people to be grateful for stuff they don’t like and won’t use just because some woman gave birth in a stable two millennia ago.

rainbowsandsmiles · 22/09/2018 12:42

If someone made me a patchwork quilt I would be very very grateful! So much work goes in to them

agree, patchwork quilts are beautiful.
Same with crocheted blankets - a lady I used to work with made me a beautiful cot blanket just before I went on maternity leave - so touched that she thought to make that for me.
15 years later it's still going strong and I could never get rid of it. Smile

JensenElephant · 22/09/2018 12:45

Or chocolate bark

The choice for people with no skill, take some perfectly good chocolate, melt it, fluff it up a bit, wrap it in cellophane with ribbon and declare it a home made gift.

why?

Badcat666 · 22/09/2018 12:48

now worries my friends all hate their delicate crotchet scarfs, baby blankets and pokemon/ minecraft crochet toys for their kids but are too polite to say anything as I'm too broke to buy the actual gifts I know they would like

LellyMcKelly · 22/09/2018 12:53

This year, get people what they want. Get them booze.

rainbowsandsmiles · 22/09/2018 12:53

now worries my friends all hate their delicate crotchet scarfs, baby blankets and pokemon/ minecraft crochet toys for their kids but are too polite to say anything as I'm too broke to buy the actual gifts I know they would like

Sad This is why threads like this are shit. Don't worry, not everyone hates being given home made stuff and only wants shop bought stuff.
I like both, but home made means more as it means time has gone into it, and as someone who is always skint myself I completely get that cost is sometimes an issue, it's not just a case of "it's easy to go to a shopping centre and get something for a fiver" like some cluelesses on this thread think.
Just because you're skint, doesn't mean you don't want to give your friends and family a present. Of chocolates or wine or bath bombs or whatever you think they'll like. You could get them nothing instead, but then they'd be no doubt complaining that they didn't get a present at all.

madja · 22/09/2018 12:54

@MrsFionaCharming
Oh my god, are they real?
They are selling sanpro shoes for a tenner!?!
GrinGrin

StrangeLookingParasite · 22/09/2018 12:58

This year, get people what they want. Get them booze.

I don't drink. I am not that unusual.

passwordfailure · 22/09/2018 13:09

Well sometimes there's other issues. My sister is very, very wealthy. I'm very, very not. I want to give her a gift but she has everything she could want materially. So i put my thinking cap on and spend months baking treats that i only i know exactly how she likes it. I hunt high and low for old photos and frame them. I made her a CD of music we had warbled and cried to as teenagers. I source the exact right thing to deal with her non existent eyebrows. It takes me months of thinking, sourcing and making. I could buy her something for £50 but what's the point, if she wanted it she could buy it. It's really difficult for me, I'm not at all crafty. But i know she drools over certain childhood treats that I can cook ie toffee and tablet.

Original poster
justilou1 · 22/09/2018 13:15

Aaaand some people can’t see the difference between homemade presents and SHITTY homemade presents.
Jams, fudge, thoughtful presents that show some attention has been paid to the taste and needs or the recipient are good.
Crotcheted, lacy nylon coat hangers decorated with glued on plastic roses and pearls are always in bad taste. They are so appallingly bad they are in fact, hilarious. This is the type of tat that I was refferring to when I started the thread, as my kids and I are going to make each other (cheap) hideously funny Christmas tat instead of serious presents.

OP posts:
EspressoButler · 22/09/2018 13:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AndhowcouldIeverrefuse · 22/09/2018 13:19

I craft, bake and preserve... but I am very realistic about other people's tastes and would not inflict my hobbies on others at present-giving occasions.

Loving his thread Grin

passwordfailure · 22/09/2018 13:46

OP - you're right, there's a difference. Haven't seen a knitted skirt Barbie toilet roll warmer for a while now that'd be fun Grin

Hanyu · 22/09/2018 13:54

On the topic of knitted kit kat pouches, my mum keeps sending me knitted creme egg covers. I mean, they are kind of cute, but I'm not sure what I'm expected to do with them long term.

SoftBlocks · 22/09/2018 13:55

Christmas cards drawn by kids are cute.
Christmas cards with a photo of someone else’s kid which is bigger than the photo I’ve got on display of my own kid - er no.

Jux · 22/09/2018 13:57

DD makes the most amazing flapjacks. People fight for them!

SilverySurfer · 22/09/2018 14:11

I agree with those who aren't keen on homemade gifts, especially food, even more especially if children have been involved in the making of the food. God knows where their fingers have been just before being plunged into the mixture - up their nose or even up their bum! Added to which I don't eat/like cinnamon, ginger, gin, spices christmas cake or chutney.

Frankly if people can't afford to buy gifts, it's better to be up front and say let's stop gifts for adults. I have done this and no-one has complained, in fact they mostly seemed relieved. The alternative is to do a Secret Santa within the family, which means buying only one gift. It also saves having to thank the person enthusiastically and then calculate how long before the item(s) can be put in the bin.