To only pay for vegan food at my wedding?

[ClaraBanana7]

Haven't set a date yet, but it'll be in around 2 years so it's not right around the corner or anything, but DP and I are both vegans. Neither of us have a problem with other people eating animal products, I don't think I've ever even brought up veganism unless I'm at a restaurant and need to order because I really hate confrontation and I've seen/heard so many cruel and horrible things being said to vegans. That said, we don't want to pay for the guests to be served animal products at our wedding.
Some of my friends think it's unfair and that restaurants etc are pandering to the vegan 'fad' (even though I've been vegan all my life) so I should cater to everyone's dietary requirements. I told them I was considering putting a meat option on the catering form, but that whoever picked it would have to pay for it themselves as I really don't want to give my own money towards that industry. But, my friends also think it's unfair that some people have to pay and others don't.
DP doesn't want to have an animal product option at all, and tbh I would also prefer this, but I want a way of not isolating people who can't go a meal without eating animal products.

What's worse than a Bridezilla? A vegan Bridezilla. Serve vegan only or pay it all but don't rub other people's noses in your sectarian beliefs.

There are so many great vegan caterers out there now. Vegan Caribbean, indian, fish and chips, Mexican, pizza, cake, ice cream etc etc. A lot of them exhibit at VegFest, and other vegan fairs/festivals, maybe try and go to a few local to you before the wedding and pick a caterer from there?

At mine I'm planning to spend quite a bit on the food to ensure everyone is fed, but also gets to see how delicious and diverse vegan food can be.

Not vegetarian or vegan here but I would LOVE to go to a vegan wedding dinner.

Try something a bit different from usual stuff plated up. I’d love it.

I would just do a vegan menu without telling anyone, people will eat the food out down in front of them at weddings! I recently went to the wedding of a coeliac where the whole menu was gluten free, no one who didn't already know even noticed.

You will just cause unwelcome friction if you start asking some people to pay!

Bit ridiculous of people to say they won’t eat a vegan meal as a one off. Unless you are a caveman there will be something you can eat fgs.
At your wedding serve what you’d enjoy and what the vast majority of normal people will also enjoy

People will absolutely whinge and bitch about the lack of proper milk for tea and coffee. That's a given.

I agree with purpledaisies, maybe go for something completely different like posh soft drinks, elderflower presses and that type of thing. An option that'll be fun in it own right rather than just seeming like a pale imitation of the real thing. Which is how a lot of people will view substitute milks.

You probably have eaten vegan meals before @huggybear. You just didn't think of them as vegan meals and just thought of them as food.

I'm sure you've had a plate of chips before or pasta with tomato sauce or a jacket potato with baked beans to name just a few...

Indian is the way to go I think, so easy to make vegan and a high chance people wouldn't even notice!

No I would put cheese on beans or pasta and I'm not a chip kind of girl and if I was it would be with mayo!

Most wedding food barring my own was gopping.

As long as it's better than the shite people usually get served they'll be happy.

I went to a 30K wedding where the evening buffet looked like a load of frozen pastry things from Bookers & chicken sesame things that had turned grey.

All vegan sounds far more welcoming. Imagine if you went to a wedding and the bride asked you to pay for your vegan meal!
Vegan Indian food sounds good but I would offer a not-spicy option too.
I know an excellent vegan cake maker who does wedding cakes if you need one.

But you have still eaten lots of vegan things though even if you do add non vegan things to them.

But you have still eaten lots of vegan things though even if you do add non vegan things to them.

This is such a bizarre way of looking at a meal. That’s like saying you’ve eaten veggie at kfc because the chips didn’t contain any meat even though you had a burger.

It’s hard to accidentally eat a fully vegan meal.

My sister is a vegan and has a vegan meal for her wedding. I can understand your concern as some family were a bit miffed at the time but it was absolutely fine as everyone was just happy to be invited really. My nan just packed some ham sandwiches for my grandad!

Meat, eggs, dairy. Not vegan.

Every other food in the whole world. Vegan.

Except maybe honey. Never sure about that.

Except maybe honey. Never sure about that.

Honey isn’t vegan.

The trouble is, although your list is short, there is often hidden meat/dairy/egg in all sorts of other food. It’s quite easy to accidentally eat those if you’re not careful.

It definitely is unreasonable to ask people to pay for a meat option, but it absolutely isn’t unreasonable to only provide vegan food if you feel that strongly about serving and paying for non-vegan yourselves. I’m vegetarian but I’ll be honest, don’t feel strongly enough to not serve meat. I can imagine that if you’re vegan, even if you’re not pushy with other people, not serving meat at something as major as your wedding must be really important to you. You should be upfront about this in advance though rather than having people show up and find there’s no option.

Maybe just have an evening reception, instead of daytime and evening do. That way they can go eat what they like in the day and just have your vegan food in the evening? For me, a vegan menu wouldn’t put me off at all, but I think my husband (very fussy with food and basically a carnivore) would struggle. He would go for a close friend and get takeaway on the way home, and probably opt out if it wasn’t, or let me go alone if it was one of my friends. That would be his loss though.

I also find it really odd some people couldnt cope with one day without meat

I don't think that in 40+ years i have actually tried to cope without meat for a day.

@PurpleDaisies Many people eat pot noodles as a quick meal and some of their flavours are vegan, same with some uncle ben's flavours and Heinz soups if you don't have them with bread. Porridge with fruit/jam toppings is vegan too.

I feel like OP probably won't be serving Pot Noodles or porridge though, milk free or otherwise.

There have been loads of posts so haven’t read through them all but as a meat eater, some of the nicest food I’ve ever had at a wedding was at a wedding where the catering was vegan. Don’t give it a second thought. There will be something most people will be happy to eat.

who - really? I mean this genuinely. Am surprised that most omnivores don't have at least 1 or 2 meat free days a week. Not saying 1 or 2 vegan (but I do regularly eat vegan meals) but meat free is easy to do..

You are both vegans, so not unreasonable to have a vegan only wedding. Just let everyone know when the invites are sent out.

I feel like OP probably won't be serving Pot Noodles or porridge though, milk free or otherwise

Good thing no one suggested that she might.

So sorry @WindDoesNotBreakTheBendyTree meant to mention the person you were quoting not you! Just had your @ in my head oops