I have had to delete Instagram

[wolfywolfy]

Before I start my small rant I would just like to say that I understand that social media and places like Instagram are a platform where people feel part of something and that they can reach out and talk to people and for that I applaud it especially if you are suffering mental health and it has helped you in some way, for some people it is good to connect with people and reach out, and it has helped you positively and make changes in your life. I also understand that it is your platform to post whatever you like, freedom of speech and all that but you cannot post controversial material and not expect people to reply/ disagree....however a few things I have noticed recently are :

Lots of people on my feed have started posting videos of themselves when they are crying /upset ?
I can't quite fathom it. Once upon a time I may have felt sad for them that they were upset, but now I just find it a bit confusing that grown women are posting videos of themselves crying for some online attention every other day or so. It seems to have become like a fashionable thing on my feed ?This may sound really nasty but I can't quite get my head round someone posting a five minute video of themselves With tears rolling down their face. I get some people are on the actual verge of desperation and need some real life help and don't know what else to do and believe me I have been in a 'desperate emotional situation' many a time, But I don't understand , its all very cryptic or maybe I am just getting old ? I do know some of these people who do this IRL and they are like this IRL. I know to some people this may sound like I am being horrible and I'm sorry but it is something I have noticed as of late..

Anti Vaxxers - A mother posting that vaccinations aren't vegan and that is why her son won't have them. Yet I have seen her videos / photos of her feeding him eggs and him wearing wool, but posting that she will ignore any messages about vaccinations 'she doesn't want to hear it' . I have tried very hard to resist messaging her with some questions I have but know I will be shot down in an instant. I wonder if her child caught a horrid disease weather he would be declined treatment incase it's not vegan.
Why would you post such things but not want to deal with people legitimately interested in your point of view ? Or people wanting to ask innocent questions ?

This is one of the few reasons I have had to delete social media, in a place that was invented for people to connect I am finding people more and more difficult to engage with because everyone has this online bravado and I am finding it too triggering.
I haven't had Facebook for a number of years and it's good what not having it does for the soul and now I am giving up Instagram for the same reasons.
I enjoy mumsnet because you can have a good debate or chat on here. No pictures so not on a superficial level.
I am ready to be told IABU by some .
Thanks for reading my rant

Why? Because you're being called out on it? Not everyone is going to think the same as you.

People cry for an array of reasons. People like to post some stuff on SM and some don't.
Some people like to over share some don't. Some people like to get loads of likes and some don't.
Some people like attention and some don't.
Some people view things differently to other people.
Some people react differently to different things. Some people find things funny that others don't.
Some people cry for other reasons than being upset.
Some people cry because it's become a new thing to do on Instagram.

I blame Kim K's crying face meme 😏 oh whoops I can't laugh

@rainbowsandsmiles no because I'm beginning to think you are a troll.

@rainbowsandsmiles no because I'm beginning to think you are a troll.

What, for having a different opinion? Says it all. If you say so.

@rainbowsandsmiles no have an opinion , but you are being a wee bit goady !!!

If being goady means not going along with bitching or dismissing of others feelings, or not feeling the need to go along with the same opinion as everyone else, that's absolutely fine by me.

@rainbowsandsmiles but you are really dragging it out and we have completely derailed from the actual point of the post because you keep talking about me responding to a comment about a meme !!!!!

Wolfy - nope, you wanted to talk about people's mental health according to your OP.
Then saying but but I didn't be mean, so the only reason I have mentioned it again is to say actually, yes, you kind of are.
I'm not cheerleading you and the rest by joining in with dismissing of mental health problems when no-one but the person themselves knows if it's "put on" or not.

' This is one of the few reasons I have had to delete social media, in a place that was invented for people to connect I am finding people more and more difficult to engage with because everyone has this online bravado and I am finding it too triggering. '

You are proving my point.

Not only have you told me I am being an attention seeker. You have also tried to assassinate my character by saying I'm mean and nasty .

You completely derailed the thread to be a bout a meme.
You have been deliberately goady and no body is dismissing anything. You have your opinion and that's great. But while telling me your option you have also tried to belittle me .
This post was light hearted and a bit of a chat.
I'm sorry you cannot see that.

I agree that social media can be bad for mental health, I don't blame you for wanting to delete it. Never disagreed there.
If anyone's feeling low, inadequate, jealous, anxious, depressed etc, it's not a good place to be.
People are going to have different opinions to you though, if you put them out there not everyone is going to agree. If that's triggering you're right, and you're NBU and are best off having a rest from it for a while.

You have also tried to assassinate my character by saying I'm mean and nasty .

FGS, no I haven't, I don't even know you. If you (and others, not just you) post it's put on, it's attention seeking, etc, be prepared for people to not want to agree with that.
Some of these posts are mean. They're hardly kind, are they?

@rainbowsandsmiles of course everyone has different opinions and I acknowledge that and have previously in this thread said I understand people's view and apologised if anything I said seemed insensitive or came across badly ? But there is saying your opinion in a good manner and then there is saying your opinion while trying to belittle somebodies character by calling them mean and attention seeking ? Bringing up one small comment to use against them that completely goes against everything I was trying to say in this thread ! That to me is not how you respond to somebody when having a talk, at the end of the day each to their own ! Your opinion my opinion it really doesn't matter in the grand scheme of things :)

I don’t think I could follow an anti vaxer, I’d get too angry, and wouldn’t want them to think my follow was endorsing their views.

@Sparklesocks it was very upsetting x

it is a good platform in terms of say if you run tour own business or are in a band/ artist etc

@mirruvan elaborate please

This was the reason I stopped using FB, but on Instagram, I only follow actors and musicians and no angst on there.

I quite like Istagram. I follow mainly fashion accounts but I am starting to unfollow them as they are really all just salespeople uploading adverts.

I think this very thing will be the demise of Istagram entirely.

My feed is fine too. Lots of houses, decor and clothes.

it was very upsetting

Why follow her then?

That's the point. Social media doesn't have to be upsetting.

I don't follow people who post stuff like 'god so fuming' followed by loads of 'I'll pm you hun' when people ask if they are ok.

I don't follow people whose posts make me feel uncomfortable. Wether that's because they have an illness or attention seeking or whatever. I have depression and anxiety and it makes me feel worse. I protect my mental health first.

I also don't follow people who are all 'oh my life is so perfect', especially if I know them in real life and know it's bull.

I like interior design accounts. And lots of people may take those accounts as people showing off their money, perfect life etc. But they don't make me feel like that envious. There's a great account of a woman that lives near me and she does houses up. I am impressed rather than jealous she has the money to buy house and renovate them.

I, also, have no issue telling people in real life why I have unfollowed/ unfriended them.

I did follow her once upon a time and it all got a bit weird ! So then unfollowed her and then made a decision to give up SM :)
Yes following the wrong things can be bad for anxiety and depression. It just seems that recently some of the people I followed, drastically changed their content from being seemingly helpful and positive to really harmful, a few ' insta mums' etc, but that is the way of the world I guess :) and you can unfollow and filter it, but for me it's probably just easier to use another platform !!! This is just my own personal experience!
The interior design accounts sound good , I have heard of Pinterest that is better for finding good content without so much of being a place for people to comment etc ?

Just coming back to this as I see the argument carried on - I think it was actually me that derailed the conversation by bringing up the MH posting (sorry OP), I do think there has been some virtue signalling in retaliation to that. I never said every.single.person is attention seeking, I never implied everyone who posts these things are jumping on the trend, I merely stated that a lot of people who post this type of stuff do it for attention and it makes a mockery of real issues.

Still stand by what I said about it being a fad for some.

pumpastrotter I understand - it's a thing that happens when anyone talks about the issue of faddiness or bandwagons, with things like allergies/intolerances, any kind of health issue, etc. If you raise the fact that some people use these things to attention seek or feel important, there will always be those who take massive offence and miss the point that you don't mean the genuine cases, and in fact the faddy behaviour undermines the genuine cases. Some people will just not hear of it because they take it as an attack on any sufferer. I've been in this kind of argument before on MN.

Faddiness/fakery of all kinds does actually exist, obviously and realistically of course it does.