Treating child on a harness, like a dog???

[Damnivy]

So keep my 2 year old on a child harness if we are out and about. She doesn't like using a pram anymore. And loves to run off, or finds something she likes the look of and just stops moving! I have 4dcs and only had to use them with my youngest.
I have a 3 year old too and makes it hard when the youngest runs off as have to grab the 3 year old before I can go after her, as can't leave either unattended.
So the harness is safe and practical. Dd walks brilliantly whilst on the harness with no complaint.
So today while in town, a lady starts smiling at dd and saying hello! Innocent enough! But then walks over and tells me what a sweet child dd is, but she can't help but feel sorry for her being 'tied up'. And I should stop treating her like a dog!!!! Iv had a few people say in the past that they wouldn't use a harness as they feel like they are walking a dog ect..
So AIBU in using this as a safety precaution while trying to teach my dd road safety and to stop running off, or do I look as though I should be walking a dog? Did you use them/won't use them, or have any ideas of how to stop my child running off?

I think the idea is good for when they are new walkers but after that I just hold their hand.

@butlerswharf I presume that you've got a significant age gap? Holding two toddlers hands 100% of the time is impossible

Why do people do this?!? Giving unsolicited advice over vanishingly small issues. She feels sorry for your dd? How would she describe how she feels about kids in Aleppo?

I wrap the reins around my hand and hold ds hand on top. He's nearly two. He could slip my hand and be under a bus in the split second it would take me to realise. The reins are insurance against this.

How utterly ridiculous. I prefer holding hands than using the reins with my 13 month old simply because I prefer to walk alongside her rather than behind, but since she squirmed her hand out from mine and ran towards a dog that was on the OTHER SIDE of the main road last week (she only just made it to the kerb, not actually into the road) now she wears her little backpack with reins all the time when we're out walking. She might only be young but she can happily walk for 15 mins or so and that one incident has terrified me. Also means she doesnt have to have her little arm sticking up in the air while holding my hand all the time we're out, surely that's not comfortable.

You used to be able to but reins with bells on and my 2 boys loved pretending to be sleigh horses. Better safe than sorry.

I have no idea why people are so weird when it comes to reins? I'd rather have my runner child on reins than have him run over.

My dog has a collar & lead and my horse has a head collar & lead rope because I love them and don't want them to get hurt so why wouldn't I do the same for my son? 😕🙄

I wish my DC would use them. I’m currently really ill with arthritis and cannot safely take my own child to places like the park unless I have someone with me. LO won’t use them though so we are just stuck in the house 🤷‍♀️

Safety should alway come top priority and all kids could bolt if they wanted to.

Out of interest, are the bag ones secure? I remember my cousin using one on her DD 7ish years ago and the bag slipped off her when she bolted (I’m guessing it’s because it was a rucksack which didn’t secure around the body). Do they secure around the body now?

I used to hold the reins, and hold their hands when they were crossing the road, so they knew that crossing the road meant holding hands.

EwIts I'm not blaming James's mother. It was just that using reins when DS1 could walk was a no-brainer. It was primarily for road safety, but when James died, that became another reason. It was my first thought, because I thought all parents used them. Now they seem to be very rare.

Wizzbang I don't know, I said stop and they stopped, then after 4 or 5 times they stopped before I said it. Whatever I did worked, I'm not sure what it was.

I had 2 who bolted in the opposite direction.

A ds who walked at 9months and a 2, year old.

I used reins and a couple of extendable dog leads.

It gave them more freedom as I wouldn't have been able to hold their hands

I

Can’t understand why they are not used so much these days. The children can dash along and yet are safe. They can even be yanked up to prevent a fall. Much better for them than being continually in their push chairs.

Re the slippery hand thing. I would have had to grip DD's hand so hard that I would have hurt her, so reins were the best way. We used them on her as soon as she could walk so it was normal for her.

smile sickly at her, tilt your head and say "hmm, interesting!" and leave it at that. She will be confused.

Then do what you want and ignore busybodies :)

I know this is quite a trivial point but also after I took my kids out of the buggy I had to teach them to hold my hand and the lesson stuck but now they are 6 and there's two of them and that's three years I haven't been able to scratch my bum nose when I'm out walking

YANBU. My mum used them with my younger sibling and it kept her safe as she would have run off otherwise.

DSD was fab, could walk from an early age but would never have run off so DP didn't even need to think about using one. We'd use one if DC2 was that way inclined though even though DSD would be fine by herself for a moment whilst we run after the younger one.

Also to add I don't think I could physically hold a small child's hand for too long due to my disability so a harness would be the best option for us

DS1 wasn't too bad on a harness. He disliked it, but put up with it and it was great in very crowded places or walking along the tow path. Even with a tight grip on a child's hand, they can take you by surprise.

DS2 was another story. He fought against it with every fibre of his being. He would lean forward, forcing me to take up the slack, so that I was carrying him along like a mini Tom Cruise in the opening scene of Mission Impossible. I got some very strange looks.