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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Well off friend in council house

293 replies

toughtimes2001 · 23/08/2018 19:31

Please tell me if I am being unfair.

My friend and her partner (mid 20's) earn a combined salary of of £65K (no kids) and have a cheap council tenancy home with a massive garden in a lovely part of London (her partner sneakily inherited the tenancy from his deceased father a couple of years back). The have a lovely life with plenty of disposable income as their rent is very cheap and go on lovely holidays and are saving up a massive deposit for their own home which they intend to buy in a couple of years. I should also add, she has very wealthy parents who dish out money to them left right and centre for various things throughout the year.

Meanwhile, I a single mum earn £19K (no family support) privately rent a rubbish 1 bedroom flat (which is more in rent than they pay) in a rubbish part of town with no hope of ever buying a home or taking my DS on a luxury holiday. I have also been told I am not a priority for housing so no hope for me any time soon!

Am I right to think this is just completely unfair?

OP posts:
Cornettoninja · 23/08/2018 20:12

Comparison is the thief of joy.

ReanimatedSGB · 23/08/2018 20:12

Where's the father of your DC, OP? (Apologies if he is actually deceased) Is it worth improving your situation by ensuring that he pays what he should towards his children?

AllDayBreakfast · 23/08/2018 20:12

If they're both making about £30k then presumably this was down to their hard work. Maybe you should consider how to further your own career.

HPFA · 23/08/2018 20:12

Council housing was not always assumed to be for the poor only -Aneurin Bevan's vision was for mixed communities.

www.theguardian.com/society/2002/mar/27/communities.housingpolicy

The destruction of social housing has been the most socially disastrous policy since the Second World War, although Brexit may overtake it.

OctaviaOctober · 23/08/2018 20:14

I know someone who took over a tenancy when his only relationship to the former tenant was being cousin to her child. I have no idea how he managed it but he did. I think she moved out, he moved in, and they just presented it as a done deal. There was an extra layer to it which I won't go into, but I think it was just easier for the council to give in than to take on the family.

StubbleTurnips · 23/08/2018 20:14

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Racecardriver · 23/08/2018 20:17

YANBU to think that they shouldn't be living in that house. It's dishonest in a way. But YABU to think you should be any more entitled to a house they are. You are all healthy adults, you should all be finding your iwm housing instead of paying heavily reduced rents from councils that really should either sell up to raise money for other services or use their housing stocks to prevent homelessness.

user1457017537 · 23/08/2018 20:19

Here we go again .......

Badtasteflump · 23/08/2018 20:19

Of course it's possible for people to 'sneakily' inherit a council tenancy - I know people who did it. An adult child just pretends to live with their elderly parent (ie on paper) then is able to take over the tenancy when their parent dies. It happens a lot.

ButchyRestingFace · 23/08/2018 20:20

(her partner sneakily inherited the tenancy from his deceased father a couple of years back)

How did he “sneakily” do that, pray?

Do tell.

Becles · 23/08/2018 20:21

Why do you think only poor people should live in council housing?

They were designed do have different types of people living there and certainly never intended to be seen as a ghetto. The concerted tory and nu-lab efforts to decimate social housing and affordable rents are what's affecting your rent and availability of housing.

RomanyRoots · 23/08/2018 20:22

I'm not sure you are her friend.

FourFriedChickensDryWhiteToast · 23/08/2018 20:22

right well, yes I can see how that could happen, Alternatively, it was his family home and he was also responsible for paying the rent , as an adult.
Anyway threads like this are just so very dull, and slightly worrying as they show how people have been brainwashed about council houses, among other things.

ButchyRestingFace · 23/08/2018 20:23

An adult child just pretends to live with their elderly parent (ie on paper) then is able to take over the tenancy when their parent dies. It happens a lot.

Well, I must have done something wrong.

When my mum died last year (Scotland), it was made very clear by her local council that you would have to jump through ye number of hoops to prove that you lived at that property in order to inherit the tenancy.

SoyDora · 23/08/2018 20:24

Their situation has no bearing on yours. If they gave up their tenancy tomorrow and moved into a private rented house, you’d still be a single mother privately renting a one bed flat. They don’t take the tenancy from them and give it to you.
There is no salary cap on council houses. They are working while saving to buy a house.

ViserionTheDragon · 23/08/2018 20:24

YABU. You said yourself that they are saving up for a house of their own, let them get on with it. They clearly won't be there in the long term.

backaftera2yearbreak · 23/08/2018 20:26

Nothing “sneaky” about inheriting a tenancy. It’s the bloody law!

Mrskeats · 23/08/2018 20:27

Jealousy is not a good look.
And it’s none of your business frankly.

Chocolate50 · 23/08/2018 20:29

ask them if they will put you on the tenancy then you can 'inherit' their council house when they move out, sorted!

Tumbleweed101 · 23/08/2018 20:29

He'd have been on the tenancy or had a right to inherit when his father passed away, nothing sneaky about that assuming it had been his family home as he grew up.

Council rents aren't cheap - they are realistic. It's private rents that are over priced.

If they are saving up for their own place then the house will be available for others needing social housing soon.

Life is what it is. Her partner had to lose his father to get the tenancy and I'm sure he'd rather have his dad than a house.

flopsyrabbit1 · 23/08/2018 20:31

YABU

your choice to have a child and it does not put you at the front of the que because your a SP

they both work so why should they not be entitled to social housing

EdWinchester · 23/08/2018 20:35

I can't see a problem.

My sister has just been given £585k by her inlaws as they've decided to sell their house to a family member, it's just good fortune.

lola212121 · 23/08/2018 20:38

I can't stand. People saying you made the choices you did and now you're here ... um no ! Life doesn't work like that ! What stupidity !

Twolittlebears · 23/08/2018 20:38

Wow OP. Lots of people here think it's easy to earn big money if you just try harder! Sounds like something Donald Trump would say and not entirely true in my view.

As for your OP, I don't think you should begrudge them. But I understand why you feel hard done by.

To me this is another example of how much luck plays a role in what housing you get. His dad was lucky to get a council place which he was lucky to inherit the tenancy of. Many in parents generation were lucky to be born at a time when houses were easily affordable in London on normal salaries and they could buy cheaply in what's now a super plush area. Others are lucky to get some help for a down payment. Housing has very little to do with fairness in this country so I'm surprised as some of the responses here tbh.

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