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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To really fucking hate our dog

207 replies

fuckingdog18 · 23/08/2018 07:30

Jesus.

Both dh and I are on the verge of killing him. He barks at fuck all at any hour of the night.

He wakes our own children up and also next doors as he sets their dog off.

The dog is ruining our relationship, our children’s sleep and our relationship with the neighbours

We are in despair.

OP posts:
RoseWhiteTips · 23/08/2018 10:39

Have not read this and do not intend to. You title makes me sick.

RoseWhiteTips · 23/08/2018 10:39

Your...

RoseWhiteTips · 23/08/2018 10:39

People like you etc

Original poster
fuckingdog18 · 23/08/2018 10:40

Something is going right this morning then, Rose

OP posts:
starcrossedseahorse · 23/08/2018 10:42

OP please don't buy an anti bark collar. It will make things much worse.

Juells · 23/08/2018 10:43

LOL! Of course dogs do things for attention!

They do when they're not getting any. I've had dogs all my life but the only ones that've felt the need to do things 'for attention' are ones that have come from rescue centres. And that behaviour stops after a while, once they get a bit of attention.

As others have suggested, maybe you could allow the dog to have access to the whole house at night? Even put his basket in your room, or just outside your room with the door open for a few nights, then close the door once the dog has settled.

Dementedswan · 23/08/2018 10:45

Oh god! That sounds horrendous. I've got a dog and two young kids, your situation would drive me batty too.

You've probably had all the posters saying train him, see a behavourist etc so I won't mention that.

Can you leave a radio on low for company for the dog, let him have run of the house? Are you neighbours making noises in the night that are disturbing him?

DarlingNikita · 23/08/2018 10:45

I can't see any answers to the training or behaviourist questions, OP, but do point me and others to them if I'm wrong.

actualpuffins · 23/08/2018 10:47

Please rehome your dog with a family that can give him the time, exercise, training and attention he deserves. Do dogs everywhere a favour and don't get another

Spectacularly unhelpful. I hope YOU don't have a dog when you can't even be arsed to read a thread on the internet properly.

SilverySurfer · 23/08/2018 10:49

I go back to work soon and there is no way I can function on this little sleep!

So will the dog be left alone all day then?

I agree with everyone else - you need a behaviourist and do yourself and dogs a favour by not getting another one when the time comes.

argentino · 23/08/2018 10:52

My rescue dog (a so-called bully breed) had MAJOR issues. But with a lot of training and patience, things have totally turned around. We are currently in bed, he's watching doggy tv whilst I put together a presentation I'm giving tomorrow.

Nothing worth having comes easy.

Breaks my heart thinking of all the unloved dogs with owners that are too selfish/lazy.

bigsighall · 23/08/2018 10:57

I feel for you. Some dogs are just twats. We had one. No amount of exercise (out 4 hours a day), behaviourists (ok he got marginally better), training etc etc did anything. I’ve always had dogs and this one nearly broke me and my relationship.
People will be quick to judge but have prob never experienced the years of owning such a dog. Brew

PenelopeFlintstone · 23/08/2018 11:03

Bark collar. Petsafe brand worked for us - Maltese shihtsu driving the neighbours, and consequently me, mad.
Barked once with it on. Looked confused. Never barked again with it on. Stopped barking and sulked if I waved it at her.
Life-changing. Sold on ebay.
Citronella is different because they still smell it after they've stopped barking, which some feel is a bit unfair/confusing for the dog.
Remote bark collars can indeed be cruel but not the Petsafe vibrating ones.
Do it, OP. Hopefully it works for you too.

TheFaerieQueene · 23/08/2018 11:03

Thunder vests work very well for stressed dogs. My DDog can have periods when she is anxious and putting on the vest and gently reassuring her works wonders and she settles to sleep.

RavenLG · 23/08/2018 11:09

You say you’re answering questions but you’re not.
People are suggesting very good suggestions and you’re automatically shooting them down (dog won’t go with the dog walker, won’t be quiet upstairs) you don’t know if you don’t try. But it seems like you’re not wanting to try at all.

Give the dog to a rescue, the poor thing needs help you’re not willing to give it and avoid getting animals in future.

lola212121 · 23/08/2018 11:12

This is a troll .comedy gold

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 23/08/2018 11:20

Dogs don't do things for attention. They do things when they're in pain, distressed, bored or neglected etc.

llangennith · 23/08/2018 11:22

Haven't rtft but I get the gist of it.
Get a big crate. When you go to bed put dog in and cover the crate with a large dark sheet or blanket.
Once he's in the crate do not acknowledge him when you go downstairs unless it's time to let him out. Ignore any barking while he's in crate.
Try for 5 days then rehome him.

RumerGodden · 23/08/2018 11:23

The one question (asked 20 times!) that you have failed to answer is how much and what type of training he has had, especially when young?

Is he generally a well trained dog, good recall, good on the lead etc etc, or not?

Was it a struggle to train him or easy?

Singlenotsingle · 23/08/2018 11:31

muttsnutts I don't think so. I've seen worse on here, and some very rude comments as well. I have got a dog tbh, a small barky dog, but she's ok at night as she sleeps on our bed.

MuttsNutts · 23/08/2018 11:35

@Singlenotsingle

Muzzles should never be used to stop barking, You may have a dog but have not a clue about dog behaviour or training if you believe differently.

CSIblonde · 23/08/2018 11:42

Rehome poor thing. You're not willing to put any real effort into sorting it & on top of that you're back to work soon. So if it's anxiety related he'll get worse.

Nesssie · 23/08/2018 11:52
  1. Plug in calming device
  2. Last thing at night take the dog for a calm walk, ensuring they go to the toilet.
  3. Create a dark safe space for the dog downstairs, not necessarily a crate but a 'den' that the dog can go in, cover the top and a few of the sides.
  4. Put something of yours that smells of you in the den, along with his bed.
  5. Close all windows/curtains downstairs, put some music on low to drown out any external stimuli.
  6. If he barks, go down, let him in the garden on a lead to see if he need to go to the toilet, if not, back in, and back to bed. No playing, no talking.
  7. Vet check to rule out any illness or dementia etc
  8. Look for a certified, force free behaviourist in the area.
SilverySurfer · 23/08/2018 12:09

bigsighall
I feel for you. Some dogs are just twats.

So are some dog owners.

CheshireChat · 23/08/2018 12:25

Of course dogs do things for attention, it doesn't mean they're neglected, just means they'd like to be fussed over right now as opposed to when the owner has a moment.

OP, are you ignoring the behaviourist suggestion because it's not financially possible right now? There's loads of videos online and libraries often have books on the subject so you could try that way.

MN can be very extreme regarding pets, particularly dogs- ranging from unless you dedicate your life to your dog and treat it better than your child then you should rehome it to dogs should be shot on sight.

Also, the OP's kids have a right to sleep as well so something has to be worked out.

Just thought- are you on maternity leave? Is the dog simply jealous of the new arrival?