Think friend fancies my Husband

[Anonymumm]

Sorry, just have to get it off my chest.

A friend (not close, whom I see rarely) definitely fancies my Husband, she doesn't flirt but it's soooo obvious that she fancies him.

My DH is really handsome, and I dont think you'd put us together, but we've been together forever, married a long time, and two lovely DC.

This friend is also extremely attractive, a lot younger and a lot prettier than me.

I don't know why, but it unsettles me - I'm being silly aren't I? Insecure and silly? I guess it's because it's so bloody obvious to me (thankfully, DH oblivious and I'm not mentioning it to him or anyone else, just need to vent and get it off my chest)

Anyone else had similar?

I think we’re going to need a picture of him OP!

If you getting a vibe from her you’re probably right. My DH is normal looking but I previously was in a relationship for 4 years with a very conventionally attractive man and several of our mutual friends hit on him while we were together, a couple even blantantly said “if you ever split up with Lois I’m available”.

It pissed me off but I trusted him, we talked about it and he did everything to ensure me that he was with me and that wasn’t going to change. If your DH is oblivious he obviously isn’t on the lookout for anybody else and unless it becomes really blantant I’d just laugh it off.

"but when you get to the level you're on line telling randoms he's a sex god and model material you lose a little credibility op."

Tbf I think op is just trying to make her point in the face of some pretty sceptical scoffing.
I doubt she'd say it in rl but it's ok to be honest on an anonymous forum I think.

OP, you're there watching them both together and I'm not, so on balance if you think that your friend fancies him then she probably does
By the OP's admission this friend hasn't actually done anything though. No making a play for him. No flirting with him. Nothing. Just that the OP has decided this friend must fancy her husband because he's some sort of gorgeous sex God and the rest of us mere mortal women must be gagging for it with him.

Well she's never felt like that about anyone else, do I choose to believe that whilst the friend isn't actively flirting, there are probably some nuanced signals there to observe.

I don't think the friend has done anything wrong btw. I don't think we can help it if we fancy someone. Some of the earlier replies about cutting her off were ridiculous. But a little anonymous moan on mn because you feel a bit rubbish about it? Why not.

rainy
Is that not because the Op Has said the friend is young and attractive aka she has decided the friend must be after her husband because her friend is attractive and that makes her feel insecure.

It's like 'i have no issue with my partner having female friends... But I don't like Helen because she's friendly and attractive but Suzy and Lynne are fine because in my head I think I'm hotter than they are so they aren't a threat'

Not all women find that type of man attractive, op. Well, objectively so perhaps, but it takes a certain type of chemistry to give one the fanny gallops. Trust me I’d be more attracted to David Mitchell than David Beckham. I’m a pretty conventionally attractive woman too op, if that means anything. There’s a v good chance your dh is boring her to death and she’s just being bubbly and smiley because she’s being friendly.

Just sayin’

I don't think YABU as your feelings are real. You clearly have insecuritites around your own image and self worth and I think you should focus on some self love as corny as it sounds. I'd keep your distance from this friend for the time being. Anything that triggers these feelings and instills insecurity in your relationship can do more damage than good......and seeing as she isn't a close friend I'd say no harm in reducing contact time and living more contently without the stress of having her around you and your husband.

my Husband could be a model

For Horse & Hound?

Too far, QueenDoris, that just makes you look like you're being unkind for the sake of it.

"Is that not because the Op Has said the friend is young and attractive aka she has decided the friend must be after her husband"

Well no not really because op also said :

'I am not a jealous person..I was merely stating a fact when I said she was younger and prettier.'

And :

'Extremely attractive women have been in the presence of DH before, and will be in the future, it doesn't bother me.'

She has also acknowledged that friend has a partner and child, hasn't flirted, hasn't done anything wrong, that she herself is being silly, that her dh has reassured her and been lovely about it.

Why not have a little moan on mn about feeling a bit rubbish, it's what we're here for isn't it.