What's happened to having a bit of pride in yourself?

[daffodil10]

I am genuinely asking this question out of curiosity not being inflammatory but I will no doubt be accused of this in typical mnet style! Anyway here goes-

I don't understand why some women are so proud of the fact that the first thing they do when they get home is to take their bra off and put pjs on.

A) I don't have time as when I get in from work there's stuff to do.
B) why would you want to sit there with everything dangling about

I think it is much better for your state of mind to have a bit of pride In Yourself, to wear a bit of makeup, clean clothes, brush your hair etc. On another note if your bra is so uncomfortable you're wearing the wrong bra!

It is complex. For some being able to not give a shit is entirely down to a healthy self esteem and confodence.

For others not giving a shiot is becasue they are unable to and for others "making an effort" helps them to feel better about themselves and lots and lots of other things.

I suppose all other things being equal, the main thing for me not getting changed into clothes I couldn't wear outside is that it would be a rare evening when I didn't have to go out again in the evening to take/collect DC from things, pick up shopping etc etc. So, by the time you've done all that it's close to bedtime and I sleep naked so seems little point. I also happen to be perfectly comfy in jeans and my bra so it's never been an issue.

It doesn't fucking matter.

What's happened to using capital letters properly? It makes me want to slap my own makeup free face (I haven't used makeup in years. Don't own any now). So many misuse capital letters these days and write phrases like 'pride In Yourself'. Stop applying makeup and spend more time studying grammar. Gah! I once dumped a man who misused capital letters. He was also a cunt. Hmm, come to think of it, is there a common link there?

OP, I think you are bonkers for wearing makeup at home to relax. You say what's happened to pride, I say what happened to being comfortable with yourself? I hate the idea of makeup being equated with taking pride in yourself. It wouldn't be said to a man and you can be well groomed without it. If you feel that you need and want it, wear it as often and as much as you want but don't judge others who only wear for occasions or none at all.

When I'm working from home I will always get properly dressed and put on a bit of make up, to get me in the right frame of mind.

But when I get in from work and no I'm not going out again I will happily slouch around in my pjs with no make up. Apart from anything else, why would you want to cook food or curl up on the couch in good work clothes?

I get where you are coming from OP, nothing wrong with either tbh. Some people go home and spend time alone/ with immediate family and enjoy downtime.

In other cases you might want to look half descent when you answer the door etc. I have been off work on leave in the holidays and some days I love getting up, getting dressed and putting on a bit of make up. It cheers me up and sets me up for a positive day. Other days like today I've been busy cleaning and cooking so still sat in my pjs waiting for the luxury of a shower in which case it's a fresh pair of trackies!

My mum always said 'get up, dress up and show up.' Even know she cringes at me changing into pjs before bedtime (even though I do!). It's nice to have a bit of pride in yourself, what bothers me more is pjs in tescos!!

It doesn't fucking matter

This

Aside from the sexism in expecting a woman to be made-up and brassiered at all times, I'm very sensitive to fabrics. My clothes need to be soft and comfortable, not clinging or tight or constricting. Jeans and a bra at home would make me miserable.

OP, do you have similar exacting standards for men?

why would you want to cook food or curl up on the couch in good work clothes?

I wouldn't want to be cooking in my Pjs, especially if I was wearing them to bed. But then I'm a bit of a messy cook. I wouldn't be wearing my work clothes usually but I'd change into actual clothes rather than Pjs.

Antigon if they are exacting standards ? Yes I would expect the same male or female.

Yup, I think I've got it. OP has spent lots on having clothing specially tailored to acomodate the large stick up her a**e, and is trying to get her money's worth, by keeping it on as long as possible

I agree with you, OP, 100%, but I can’t seem to articulate an explanation without sounding like a 1950s housewife.

Then don't arealnamechanger or you will sound just like a 1950s housewife, rather like op.

Why would anyone both what people do in the privacy of their own home. It just comes across as incredibly judgey and sanctimonious.

I equate wearing pjs during the day with being either physically ill or depressed, so it is not something I would do. Plus, I am too darn lazy to change my clothes during the day, unless I am going out to something requiring smart clothes in the evening.

But, I never wear make up and can't abide the school of thought that a woman needs make up to be well presented.

And I have, once in a while, taken my bra off ìn the evening when it is digging in.

Live and let live OP.

So, can I ask, all the folk that change into Pjs, do you never need to go out again after you've come in from work? DC all grown up? no DC?, no-one does after school stuff?, don't need extra shopping? have no hobbies? Or is it just that you would do this some nights when you don't have any of those things on? I didn't have any evenings, apart from weekends, when someone didn't need ferrying somewhere and DH worked shifts or if he was about, sometimes we split the pick up's and drop offs or sometimes DC needed to be in different places. We also went through 5-6 pints of milk and the best part of a loaf of bread every day.

Not judging, just realising that I probably did far too much and considering that DC do no hobbies at all now as almost adults, maybe it was all a waste of time! :o

I can change from PJs into outdoor stuff in 30 seconds flat. Including a bra. And vice versa.

What are your exacting standards for men, OP?

Thank you @EmpressOfSpartacus - what a lovely compliment.

So, can I ask, all the folk that change into Pjs, do you never need to go out again after you've come in from work?

Nope. I'm childfree so no problems there, and I work in Central London which is also where I do most of my socialising. If I have something planned or need to shop, 95% of the time I'll be going straight from work. Once I'm home, I'm home.

I guess people change into their pjs or loungewear, when they know they are in for the night, or morning or whatever. Then get changed, if they need to go somewhere.

I suppose to me it might feel like I make an effort to look nice all day, but oh, hello, husband - here I am looking like I just got out of bed. See, I knew it would sound bad

SDTG Aroooooooooo!

So, can I ask, all the folk that change into Pjs, do you never need to go out again after you've come in from work?

Never

DC all grown up? no DC?, no-one does after school stuff?

Yes but all classes are straight from school so once they’re done, we’re in.

don't need extra shopping?

Nope - meal plan and shop once a week.

have no hobbies?

Inside ones!

So, can I ask, all the folk that change into Pjs, do you never need to go out again after you've come in from work?

Can't have DC
Do any socialising or hobbies (eg gym, yoga) straight from work
Weekly Ocado and then top up shop as needed on the way home
Once I'm in, I'm in. There's no reason to come home first then go out again.
Comfy clothes go on, and then change into clean PJs when I get into bed