Scalded for drinking alcohol by a stranger

[Boilin]

Went to Wetherspoons (I'm still there) with DP. I'm 28 weeks pregnant at the moment and had half a pint of cider with my meal. The woman who served it to me had no issue with it whatsoever, but the man stood next to me (not sure if he was slightly drunk) felt it appropriate to tell my DP that 'that won't be good for her or the baby' (hello I'm stood right here ). DP told him, 'it's fine' and told me to ignore him and the bloke then continued to discuss under his breath with his partner/friend my choice to have a drink.

AIBU to think he had no right? To think that it's fine that I had half a pint once in a blue moon? To feel pissed off with the constant judgement of my ever move since I've been pregnant?

Ugh. I've just had enough of today! Sorry for moaning...

So many people being shown up here. Disgusting creatures. Selfish, self-centred and probably sozzled.

Great argument. Brilliant. Total winner.

Good to know that even ‘probably sozzled’ several of us can out-logic you

@WeightorWhite where can I get some crack?

@Boilin you didn't really expect to post that you'd had half a pint of cider and not get lambasted did you?! This is the most judgy place there is.

FWIW I don't think there's any harm in the odd drink. Fgs how many of us have drunk before we knew we were pregnant.

Flatpack you know, I did drink an entire 330ml bottle of lager with dinner. I'm clearly completely plastered. And in charge of my toddler too!

If I could roll my eyes any harder they'd fall out.

@imnotreally I know I'm so bloody stupid. AIBU as well just glad I name changed!

@skunkatanka
Women can, of course, do as they wish whilst pregnant. It's entirely up to the individual person. It's just sad that some people choose to drink.

Aw yeah - faux-sympathy to mask your judgmental tendencies. That’s nice. So, so sad 😢

It doesn't take a lot of alcohol for a child to be born with a multitude of problems, including FAS.

Isn't the point that actually it does take a lot of alcohol for a child to be born with problems? At least, that was what a very well respected gynaecologist/obstetrician told me when I went to see him in a panic having unexpectedly found out I was pregnant after a boozy holiday!

All the advice in pregnancy caters to the lowest common denominator, in my experience. Enjoy your half of cider, OP.....

Where are you I can arrange a delivery! You're pregnant you don't want to be walking!

@Flatpackjackie I find it hilarious that I clearly care more about any form of risk on my baby than these ladies who are older than me, its mind boggling, and ever so sorry that I'm younger than you @ASatisfyingThump knowledge doesn't come with age, it comes with experience, you might think I have non, because "I've barely finished school" but I think you'll find if you knew me, you'd also know ive raised my bother and sister since I was 12, been through shit as a child, got kicked out at 16, have lived with my partner ever since, and suffered 2 MMC's and one lead to me having sepsis to where I nearly died. but nooooo, I know absolutely zilch so excuse me if I'm trying to pass on information through my experiences, and I shouldn't have to defend my opinion, you could of ignored my message, but you didn't, so somewhere in there you must know I'm right, and you're really trying to just convince yourself that its ok.

SavanahXx

You seem rather preoccupied with being younger than other people. Perhaps you think being young makes it less likely that people will challenge you?

Oh well. Certainty is the province of the young, isn't it? Give yourself twenty years and you'll hardly know anything.

Ok in support of @Flatpackjackie

Who is drinking tonight?
Who is sozzled tonight?

Me on my second glass of red! @Flatpackjackie, cone shoot me for it! I can't do without my weekend drink so I've got a MASSIVE issue!

excuse me if I'm trying to pass on information through my experiences, and I shouldn't have to defend my opinion, you could of ignored my message, but you didn't, so somewhere in there you must know I'm right, and you're really trying to just convince yourself that its ok.

You’re experiences sounds tough, but totally fucking irrelevant to drinking half a cider whilst pregnant!?!

And no, just because someone is ignoring your idiocy it doesn’t mean they think you’re right, you’ve ignored all of my posts... and I’m Pretty sure you’re still clinging to your ignorance

@SavanahXx Sorry but having those experiences doesn't mean you know anything about the risks of alcohol to a foetus.

just had a thought I am a tea addict - consider how much caffeine my poor dc were swamped with & I bf - that's a worry!

[https://www.nhs.uk/news/pregnancy-and-child/drinking-in-pregnancy-guidance/ NHS Guidance].

"Pregnant women and women planning a pregnancy should be advised to avoid drinking alcohol in the first three months of pregnancy if possible because it may be associated with an increased risk of miscarriage.

If women choose to drink alcohol during pregnancy they should be advised to drink no more than one to two UK units once or twice a week (one unit equals half a pint of ordinary strength lager or beer, or one shot [25 ml] of spirits. One small [125 ml] glass of wine is equal to 1.5 UK units). Although there is uncertainty regarding a safe level of alcohol consumption in pregnancy, at this low level there is no evidence of harm to the unborn baby."

I clearly care more about any form of risk on my baby

You are hilariously judgemental. With that sort of attitude I sure hope you are going to make every parenting decision perfectly to minimise the ‘risks’ to your baby, including breastfeeding exclusively for 6 months, and only feeding them organic vegetables thereafter.

NHS Guidance

Link fail, also I'm not pregnant and drink about three units a year in case someone thinks I'm justifying my own pregnant boozing.

Scrap all of that, I've just noticed it's older advice.

Wait until the baby arrives..... the judgement police will treble!

Savannah for what it's worth, the reason why there are so many alcohol related deaths is not necessarily because it's so much worse than cocoaine and ecstasy, it's because it's so very much widely used. Alcohol is legal after all.

Think about it. Guns cause way more death rates in America than in England. This doesn't mean that American firearms are more dangerous, it just means that way way more people use them.

That argument is absolutely moot.
And whilst Ecstacy May contain a flower extract or whatever you managed to Google up, MDMA (the main part of E's that gets you wasted) is very much manmade.

But that's all by the by. The point has been totally lost on you unfortunately.
You've been like a red bull to a flag and missed the point entirely. You've taken a far to extreme approach to a minor situation that never was and never will be an issue.
A mountain out of not even a mole hill, some might say.

I remember getting told off by a stranger for drinking a mocktail while I was pregnant. When I pointed out it didn't have any alcohol in it they actually said "still though..." as if the association alone was enough to somehow cause harm. A shop assistant also refused to sell me alcohol free beer in Sainsbury's, despite the fact it had "alcohol free, 0.0%" in large letters on it. The same woman lectured me on having a bag of crisps in my shopping basket, and not enough vegetables. Another friend used to tut and scowl every time I had a cup of coffee. The rudeness and sense of entitlement from some people towards pregnant women is astonishing! Funnily enough, as soon as the child is born, people seem to stop giving a shit. A pregnant woman drinking a half of cider sets the whole world frothing with rage - a child having insults screamed at them by their parent and we're all supposed to mind our own business.

I thought that maybe you would all know better as to even putting any form of risk on an unborn baby

Savanah, I put loads of risks on my unborn baby, as I said upthread. I made judgements about the size of the risk. Now, it might be because you're young, or there might be other reasons, including what you have been through in your life, but the reality here is that you are coming across as someone who can't differentiate risks very well.

Red bull to a flag 😂😂😂😂

Don't drink Red Bull when preggers, although caffeine is plant based...