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Original poster

Share passive aggressive comments you've received from your MIL

217 replies

oxymomon · 09/08/2018 08:49

My MIL is a cow to me. But she is also cunning enough to be able to veil her comments so they go over the head of my husband and father in law. E.g. when I put on weight recently and she kept saying "you look healthy". I knew it was a dig but I couldn't say anything. I said it to my husband after and he thought she was just being nice.

I thought it would be helpful to hear what other passive aggressive comments others have received from your in-laws. But feel free to just share any out and out insults too. I'd also love to hear your responses, or do you all just grin and bear the comments?

I'll finish with one of her worst: when we first got engaged, she said "I was glad you didn't put it in the paper in case it doesn't work out"...

OP posts:
londonfever · 09/08/2018 11:32

6 weeks after giving birth to my twins, MIL comes to visit and 'help out' for a few days...On her last night, she gives me a 'present' of a Slimming World Magazine...DP was horrified and asked if she needed to be talked to. It is just one of the many examples I deal with on a regular basis. For the most part I can ignore her but every so often she gets right under my skin...

TattyCat · 09/08/2018 11:37

And my personal favourite though not PA; with hand on DH’s thigh, looking into his eyes “ooh, if you weren’t my son”

WTF!

I can believe this. My MIL is similar with DH - he hates it and constantly tells her to get off him when she's trying to play footsie with him whilst sitting next to him. It's weird.

Brownieb · 09/08/2018 11:44

Not so passive- “you don’t need to feed baby brownie he is not crying, I have four children so I know”.... Later that day. “Breast feeding makes you feel like a big cow doesn’t it?, let’s hope you don’t get foot and mouth”... Hmm

SadTrombone · 09/08/2018 11:50

"Yes, I'm sure you'd look somewhat ropey had you pushed out a 10lb rottweiler from your front arse 3 hours earlier, you ashen-faced shite."

Cannot stop laughing at this.

cholka · 09/08/2018 11:54

[Midway through a meal] "You like your food, don't you cholka?"

[Eyes me up and down] "You like colourful clothes, don't you?"

I'm sure she was glad to see the back of me when I split from her son.

MrsMWA · 09/08/2018 11:55

“It’s so bland” knowing I’d spent 6 months project managing the refurb of our house.

MrsMWA · 09/08/2018 11:56

Oh and she also does the creepy “ooh I love a man in a suit” at DH. Shudder.

sparkling123 · 09/08/2018 12:00

When me and DH first got together, the third time I visited their house my (now) MIL had put up lots of painting my husbands ex girlfriend had made him when they were together in his bedroom. She also added me as a friend on FB and within a week was commenting on DH's exes photos saying she looked gorgeous, etc. I was very Hmm and mentioned it to husband, in a 'am I being paranoid?' way. Needless to say he was pretty embarrassed by her behaviour and the pictures came down. I just keep telling myself to not be paranoid, there have been things since then. Like when we first visited after getting engaged. DH was upstairs on loo so I started telling her details about our engagement, she interrupted me after about 2 minutes and completely changed the subject to what she had bought from the shops that week. I just let this stuff go over my head now, maybe I'm paranoid, maybe not. I'm still married to her son, not her and that's the main thing!

Melanippe · 09/08/2018 12:04

My MiL invited DH's ex to our wedding a couple of days before the wedding. So I ran round sorting out favours/meal/seating because I was a mug so this woman wouldn't feel left out only to be told on the day that she was only coming to witness DH "throwing his life away" and wouldn't want to celebrate that. DH's ex looked utterly bewildered by the whole thing, poor woman.

She is absolutely convinced I am the wrong woman for DH and regularly tells him about women she's met who would make better wives because they keep their houses immaculate

I no longer have anything to do with her and this is used as yet more reasons why I am a shit wife. Well, fuck her.

itsBritneyBeach · 09/08/2018 12:04

My MIL isn't awful but she's very passive aggressive and hides it well as mentioned in the OP Hmm

Things like asking if me and DP want a cup of tea, we both say yes, only one cup gets brought out. "Oooh I forgot you were here haha!" In the space of 5 minutes.. every time I come round? Hmm and this is not followed by an offer to make me one, so I've started doing the same back Grin

When I had to quit my job in Project Management at a very good engineering company because of depression it was "oh what a shame, someone else could have had that job.. you really should have thought of this before you applied" Sad

My Christmas present was a pair of men's size 8-16 socks with a cartoon turkey on themGrin after asking what I'd like and I asked for a scented candle. Bloody brilliant!!

Melanippe · 09/08/2018 12:06

My mother is the one for telling my DH that he's a bit of a looker. She has form for doing this with my friends/exes. It freaked the hell out of DH when she first started on him.

ryanne · 09/08/2018 12:06

DP in hospital for a few days. Family huddled around bedside.

Mil "don't go discharging yourself before you're better"
DP " don't be silly, of course I won't"
Mil "well, someone's got to look after you"
Me "Shock"

SheSnapsThenSheFarts · 09/08/2018 12:09

Our wedding photo didn't go up on the wall (or get displayed anywhere in her house) until my sister in laws was taken down when she split from her husband.

I have other petty little wedding related PA tales but I fear they may out me......

KipperTheFrog · 09/08/2018 12:10

A favorite of my MIL is "well, it's hard to keep the house clean when you work". Sounds ok, but she says it when the house is perfectly clean!
It's more PA actions than words from MIL though.

ThreadKillerMonster · 09/08/2018 12:13

When DH told his father what we had decided to call our DS, he was silent for ages then looked daggers at me before turning to DH and saying "and you're OK with that are you?" Obviously he hated the name and was ever willing to lay any shit at my door........

Whipsmart · 09/08/2018 12:13

I love these! I think “what does your postman look like?” is my favourite so far Grin

Atchiclees · 09/08/2018 12:18

On noting I had a new watch “It’s gold?! Looks like brass”.

Pywife2 · 09/08/2018 12:19

My MIL was vile to everyone, not just me. It was a family joke between DH and SIL, recounting the nasty behaviour. SIL got the worst of it, DH very much the blue-eyed boy.

She regularly made snide comments, not at all subtle, e.g. when staying with us 'Isn't she spoilt? Look at our poor son doing all the cooking! She's so spoilt isn't she?' All to FIL while I was in the room.

FIL was bullied relentlessly by her, but was also not a very nice person. His comment to me, when I was handing round nibbles, all dressed up on Xmas Eve at our house: 'You used to be a slim little thing when you married my son'.

Needless to say, all their grand daughters are very very thin.

Maelstrop · 09/08/2018 12:20

Shes now not speaking to me because we rent and renting is beneath her.

Jesus Christ, the woman is an idiot! Has the sheer lack of logic escaped her entirely?

Chartreuseveil · 09/08/2018 12:21

I love "ashen-faced shite" as a general insult. I'm aiming to use that asap, not with current MIL though, she's a diamond who always tells her son how lucky he is to have me Smile

DowntownDallas · 09/08/2018 12:24

Mine bought me size 5 slippers (I have never worn a slipper my life) for 3 years as my feet could not possibly be a size 7 as ladies don't have feet that large.

MenaMecca · 09/08/2018 12:29

"What's your waistline now, 24 inches?"

To me, visibly a size 14.

:D :D :D

a2inthehouse · 09/08/2018 12:30

@ZaphodBeeblerox that is awful! I really hope you are no contact with that witch. Sorry for your loss Thanks

BeachCrow · 09/08/2018 12:31

Mil regularly mentions how we must have great soil because our plants are so big but my favourite comment was, "Your garden is lovely but I'd be afraid to have mine like this in case it offended the neighbours."

Metoodear · 09/08/2018 12:32

Your people have very interesting hair

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