To think my boyfriend charging me for decorating is a bit crazy?

[lucyloo345]

I've been seeing him 9 months and he is a professional painter and decorator.
I need my stairs and hall doing so asked him on his day off if he wouldn't mind helping.
I got quoted £350 from a guy a couple of years ago but couldn't afford it at the time.
My boyfriend says he will do it next Sunday ...tells me to get the paper and paste.
Then he says shall we say £285 ?
Ok ..so I was going to give him something but the fact he is making it like a official job has annoyed me a bit.
Would you be a bit taken back?

@DontDrinkDontSmoke - Love it!

@PeanuttyButter - My DP agrees too.

postcodejack where do I start on this one. Dont your dh or partner do things to you because they love you. What about everything g op has done to help her boyfriend, cook, do his washing and ironing, give his sister lifts. Maybe she should charge him then, if that's the way to go. He is a cheeky fecker charging his girlfriend as if he would a client. He's only doing the stairs, she's doing the rest of it herself and providing g materials! Get rid op!

Get these signs up n tell him to piss off

@shumpalumpa I wrote above what I think. I think he’s either selfish or not wanting to fully invest in the relationship. I mentioned my Dh point of view because he’s forever getting asked ‘favours’ related to his work from others and it’s usually 50:50 if he does it

Op he lives at home with his mum and does do his share of washomg, cooling or cleaning.

HE IS MOT FUTURE PARTNER MATERIAL.

Not. Not mot. This is the downside of having beautiful nails for two months a year. Typos.

But Peanutty, OP asked him to help her do it, not for him to do it himself. I think that makes all the difference. Plus she sounds like she does plenty for him without asking for payment.

A friend of a friend changed my locks for me, put a bolt on my door and fixed my bike recently, for free. He wouldn't accept any money, I tried to pay him, but he kept on insisting. Lots of people have done things for me for free in the past. And I have done lots of things for people for free. I think that's the way it should be.

I don't think your boyfriend is a very nice person.

If you do decide to pay him for decorating, insist all the money goes through the books and he pays tax on it. Get a proper receipt.

What a knob!

How does he “not have time” for washing his clothes? How long does it take to push them into the machine, ass powder and press the button?

• Add powder rather than ass powder!!

LOL@ass powder

9 months isn't a long time and it's your home. I think it's fair.

"DH" is very different to short term boy friend.

Nope, you ask a price, agree a price, don't ever hint you want it done for free, and if he the. Offers free you after wrangling, you accept.

Never ever ever become beholden reliant on someone. Always pay out way, fight to and relent if they seem serious. No other way until married or with children. Sorry.

To all people upthread wanting, having and expecting freebies. Bollox. It breeds a shit relationship. Always look after yourself, know you can, don't except help. You'll never end up in a stupid row over shit like this if you do, though you'll still row.

I know loads of freeloaders.... looks shit, is shit, known as it. Not on.

@walkerbean I think the clue is in the fact they are your inlaws. I.e. Family. Not the same as a 9 month relationship.

Give always. Don't expect it back.

Today 04:28 offupop

@walkerbean16 I think the clue is in the fact they are your inlaws. I.e. Family. Not the same as a 9 month relationship.

Give always. Don't expect it back.

I think he's being really mean.

My bf babysits my kids, does diy, helps with the garden. I'd be really pissed off if he ever charged me for his services. In return for his help now and again I cook his meals, do most of his washing, get him his favourite treats in. I'm not loaded money wise but these are things I can do for him that hopefully show him that I care. We also go 50/50 on everything when we go out.

I've happily used my work skills to help friends and family out, it's never occurred to me to charge. There are times when it takes me a bit longer because I have to fit it round my job but I've never asked anyone for money for a favour, and equally people have been happy to help me out for free in the past.

@pacer142

It's completely different to someone helping out - decorating is his business. It's not like someone who's good at IT helping with your computer problem. It's also presumably a full days job, not just a quick hour or so.

So, I'm "good at IT" - it's my business.
Could you please explain how exactly me helping my partner with their computer problem is not like someone good at wallpapering helping with my wallpaper problem? Completely different, because I'd be doing it sitting down? Or what?
Especially as that might just as well be a full day's job, not just a quick hour or so.

@heartsease68
The only thing I can think of is that he hasn't considered the fact that you wash and cook for him. It just might not have occurred to him.

"Might not have occured to him"?! WTAF?

Yeah people can be crazy unreasonable in only seeing their own deal.

@tildaMa I love it when people assume my job is easy. I'm a designer and people often ask me for things like 'just a flyer, should only take you 30 minutes'. If it's so easy and quick do it your bloody self!

Having said that, if my partner asked me for design services I'd never dream of charging him!

I wouldn't want him to do the job - I'd hire someone else.

He is going to turn out to be one of those obnoxious bastards who expect their wife who is a SAHM to three kids under five to pay for 50% of everything

Agreed

@annastasiabeaverhausen because we just sit "playing with a computer" all day, drinking coffee, right?