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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Complaints when eating out due to other customers?

168 replies

sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 17:59

AIBU to complain to a sandwich/bar place for the fact another customer was IMO very rude and arrogant towards us, and the staff handled it badly? And by badly I mean they just ignored us at walked off with our a word when pipped up?

I understand you can't do anything about the customer, ( that's not really my complaint, but pissed me off)
I'm local, he clearly wasn't, so I know it's not like he's going to be there again

This place was where I went for drinks the night before my wedding. It was the place I first ventured to with my 5 week old baby, and another lovely member of staff kindly pushed her round in the pram when I was near to tears because I couldn't calm her and my food was getting cold.

I suffer PND and it was one of the few places I felt okay going with DD and regularly go there with her to meet other mums or lunch with family.

I requested some doors to be pulled to as the weather had taken a sudden turn and went cold, his comments were along the lines of I shouldn't have a baby there anyway and had used to his chair to block us and the staff from closing them. When the staff tried he said no I like the fresh air and it was my own fault. The staff member just walked off without a word at that point, so I called him back over and asked if we could be moved in that case. What wound me up was the other children on the table next to us ended up wrapped in blankets because of one guy!

Would I be out of order to email explaining this?

I might be way over reacting, but it was somewhere I felt safe going with my 6mo either on my own or with people, because I knew the staff were understanding

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 30/07/2018 18:35

When you say 'We' and 'Us', who do you mean OP?

Original poster
sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 18:35

And baby wasn't in any way screaming btw she sat nicely the whole time

OP posts:
Original poster
sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 18:36

We were myself daughter parents and brother

OP posts:
Lemontart25 · 30/07/2018 18:36

I think you need to just let it go. Maybe as he was not from your town as you have stated the staff thought the arguement was not worth it for the sake of a short visit.

He was a dick, you seem alittle precious aswell tbh but if he was the closest to the door then surely he also should have the say if it's open or closed? It surely cannot have dropped that much in temperature to go from comfortably wearing shorts to needing blankets inside?! Hmm

Girlfrommars77 · 30/07/2018 18:37

I like fresh air and open doors and tend to feel the heat, I’d be annoyed if I was sitting by the doors for that reason and someone felt their desire to have them closed trumped mine to have them open.

I’m sorry you were upset, but you were both paying customers. YABU and should have just moved to another table if you were no longer happy where you were sitting.

BoxsetsAndPopcorn · 30/07/2018 18:37

Where do you live where it's the only cafe you feel safe going to?

It's been very warm today even when raining, I'm not surprised the doors were open. Neither of you were in the wrong, you having a baby doesn't trump everything else.

Thatssomebadhatharry · 30/07/2018 18:39

I’m sorry op I know you are having a tough time but I think you were over reacting. He has every right to want the door open and he may have a particular need. Your wishes don’t trump his. There is no way the temp dropped more than another layer for your baby could have fixed.

WorraLiberty · 30/07/2018 18:39

But he does have a point surely?

Why would you sit in front of an open door with a baby?

I don't blame the member of staff for walking off. All you needed to do was move if you were too cold.

No need to inconvenience anyone else by expecting the door to be closed.

HelloEllo · 30/07/2018 18:40

Weren't there hailstones too, OP?

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 30/07/2018 18:41

Yes OP. The squeaky wheel gets the oil I'm afraid. I think the customer was unreasonable, but it sounds like the staff member felt intimidated. What he should have done was take a moment, come back, and then said 'Sorry about that, would you like to move to another table'. Sounds like youth/lack of experience. I am remembering the time a young waiter abroad splilt an entire iced coffee down my pale blue linen trousers. Off he went, I assumed to get a cloth....This was about 14 yrs ago now, so I assume he isn't coming back anytime soon Grin

Loopytiles · 30/07/2018 18:41

He was rude, but you sound oversensitive, and emailing the cafe would be well OTT.

ShirleyPhallus · 30/07/2018 18:42

another lovely member of staff kindly pushed her round in the pram when I was near to tears because I couldn't calm her and my food was getting cold.

If she wasn’t crying how was she not calm? Why couldn’t your family walk around with the baby?

Sounds like they went over and above to help you when you actually weren’t on your own and your family could have pitched in

mimibunz · 30/07/2018 18:43

Don’t you have a baby to take care of? Let this go.

Original poster
sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 18:43

@ShirleyPhallus that was when I went when she was 5 weeks old, she is now six months

OP posts:
Original poster
sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 18:44

@ShirleyPhallus and that time I was venturing out for the first time on my own and near to tears because I couldn't calm her and I have no family within 3 hours

OP posts:
itswinetime · 30/07/2018 18:45

It was only while the rain was falling on our table that I was after the door being pulled to

That's a bit of a drip feed on being cold if you have a complaint it's that staff didn't help you move. As you have always had good experiences there before though I would let it drop personally.

viques · 30/07/2018 18:46

The staff were there so saw what happened, they don't need to read it as well. You were unlucky, met an idiot, don't brood on it, no one got hurt.

fixingabrokenhesrt · 30/07/2018 18:46

And your STILL thinking about it!? Seriously it's been 5 months- get over it

Original poster
sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 18:47

@SpongeBobJudgeyPants Thankyou, that was the kind of response I was hoping, I understand I might BU but I do feel very attacked by some of these comments, it's knocked my confidence about going out with her

It took me months to get comfortable being out in public so yes I might be being precious and I won't email them, but I'm aloud to be upset

There table wasn't next to the door and was actually in the corner away from the breeze and rain

OP posts:
Original poster
sweatingcobs · 30/07/2018 18:47

@fixingabrokenhesrt no, that was one time I went and how helpful they were, this is was today now she's 6 months,

OP posts:
sonlypuppyfat · 30/07/2018 18:48

I'm a menopausal woman if anyone had shut the doors I'd have melted into the floor

SD1978 · 30/07/2018 18:49

I'm sorry you had a
Bad experience. But it's a bit of a drip feed to add rain, directly into your table into the mix. But no rain on his table, even though he was directly in front of the door you wanted closed and was blocking access to it? You asked, he was an arse, the staff left it. You moved to a new table, and I hope that you all got to enjoy the rest of your lunch x

fezzesarecool · 30/07/2018 18:49

sweatingcobs What’s did your family say? Did they want to complain about this too?

fezzesarecool · 30/07/2018 18:49

*what

DailyMailReadersAreThick · 30/07/2018 18:50

So you've been at this cafe with your baby crying for so long a staff member had to step in, and now you're ordering staff to close the doors because you sat in front of open doors.

Yeah, I don't think the other guy is the problem customer.

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