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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To Not Make An Effort on DP and DSC holiday return

683 replies

IceColdCiderPlease · 27/07/2018 22:18

My partner of 3 years is taking his 2 children on holiday next week for 2 weeks.
The children stay with us EOW and during the holidays.
I’m not invited. It has never been discussed he just booked it.
They all arrive back on a Thursday evening and the DCs (15 & 17) will be here until the Monday.
The expectation is that I will have food shopped, made beds etc for their return.
AIBU to just leave it & let them order take away ?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
mikeyssister · 30/07/2018 15:51

So thrilled for you. Have you told DP? You can never have too many bikinis.

ineedwine99 · 30/07/2018 15:52

If you haven't, don't tell him about the hol, send a pic message instead when there of a glass of wine by the pool or something :-D

Sommelierrrr · 30/07/2018 15:56

Go for it op. Fab. Two fingers to the wanker!!!

Doingreat · 30/07/2018 15:56

Yes, don't tell him about your holiday plans. He will come home and fire off an angry message asking about your whereabouts... then you can take great pleasure in sending him a holiday selfie...

sexnotgender · 30/07/2018 16:01

I hope you have an AMAZING holiday.

GabriellaMontez · 30/07/2018 16:01
Grin
Flexoset · 30/07/2018 16:05

Wow, that man is an arse. Sorry to be rude, but why are you with him?

Leaving for a week will feel good. Just think how much better it would feel to leave forever!

Original poster
IceColdCiderPlease · 30/07/2018 16:14

Oh no I’m not telling him anything.

It will be an artful, foot trailing in the pool with a strategically placed bottle of chilled wine photo.

It’s going to be a reflective week - I’m bloody 47 & I need to own myself!

He’s literally just sent a text saying ‘ drinking rose with xxxxxxx 🍾’ (his sister) whilst I’m sat on my Jack Jones !

OP posts:
Aprilshowersinjuly · 30/07/2018 16:18

Wrong op, you are sat chilling without your usual millstone around your neck.....

LatteAndLettuce · 30/07/2018 16:21

Yay!!! Fantastic. Pls update when he sulks!

BlackWatchBelle · 30/07/2018 16:31

You are awesome. He is an arsehole. I would be tempted to pack any thing you hold dear or of value and shove it in storage before you go away. Then when he comes home and wants to strop theres nothing of yours he could damahe that would upset you. I am a very suspicious person

FilledSoda · 30/07/2018 16:38

Haha good for you OP.
I love a thread like this.
Have a super time .

IDontEatFriedTurtle · 30/07/2018 16:45

I don't think there's anything wrong with him taking the kids on his own on holiday especially as you've only been together 3 years and at the age they are he won't have much time left with them for family holidays.

But why on earth would he not discuss it and leave you car-less? And why on earth would make a teenager's bed and be responsible for cooking everyone dinner? What did he do before he met you?

Enjoy your holiday OP :)

Bibesia · 30/07/2018 16:47

"you’re ruining & will ruin my holiday because you haven’t been arsed to sort yourself out for the week"

What are supposed to have sorted out for the week, and how on earth does it affect his holiday?

abbey44 · 30/07/2018 16:49

That text he's sent....you'd almost think he's rubbing your nose in it, wouldn't you?

Or am I just a bit too cynical?

Enjoy your holiday, OP, and I agree with the PP who said to put your precious stuff into storage before you go. Smile

MrsElijahMikaelson · 30/07/2018 16:51

Woohoo!!Wine

You go girl. I would not tell him either, he didnt discuss with you about his holiday so I wouldnt with him.

I'd strip the beds and leave the clean sheets next to the beds for him to make the beds Grin no bread, no milk unless it's already there.

Have a good holiday and have a good think about your relationship. At 47, do you really want to put up with this piss taker?
Can you afford to live on your own? Or rent a room with a live in landlord?

I'd rather be on my own and free than being treat like a doormat.

TemptressofWaikiki · 30/07/2018 16:51

Yay! And am glad you're not shopping, washing or making beds. He can do that for his kids. Hope you will have a fab time!

agentdaisy · 30/07/2018 16:54

Enjoy your holiday op. Love the sound of the pool selfie.

I second BlackWatchBelle. While he's away put anything you value in storage/at a friend's house or move out. He's made it perfectly clear how much he doesn't value you and I wouldn't trust him to damage/chuck your things or lock you out while you're away.

MadeForThis · 30/07/2018 16:55

Have fun and keep us updated. Grin

Hissy · 30/07/2018 17:02

Go buy yourself a new phone and contract, leave the old one behind
And don’t you dare answer his calls while he’s away

Fuck him and his eow job

prettywhiteguitar · 30/07/2018 17:07

Have a lovely holiday, but don’t put up with anymore of his shit when you get back. It’s better to be single than deal with that kind of bs !

New start after the holidays !

pilates · 30/07/2018 17:15

Op, I would seriously be re-evaluating your relationship while you’re away. Have a great time.

Jaxhog · 30/07/2018 17:16

I'm not sure why you want to come back to him tbh. He doesn't sound like a partner, more a employer who doesn't pay you. Does he pay most of the bills, or could you just leave and go somewhere nicer?

CharltonLido73 · 30/07/2018 17:21

Well done! You've been (and are being) treated abysmally.

Out of curiosity, when was the last time you and your partner had a holiday together?

And why is he drinking wine with his sister right now, and not invited you? What is his rationale for this way of being?

NotNachoing · 30/07/2018 17:25

I've just rtft and love LOVE that you've booked a fab trip away! SmileSmile