To Not Make An Effort on DP and DSC holiday return

[IceColdCiderPlease]

My partner of 3 years is taking his 2 children on holiday next week for 2 weeks.
The children stay with us EOW and during the holidays.
I’m not invited. It has never been discussed he just booked it.
They all arrive back on a Thursday evening and the DCs (15 & 17) will be here until the Monday.
The expectation is that I will have food shopped, made beds etc for their return.
AIBU to just leave it & let them order take away ?

Do it then. From the way you've been talking over the course of the thread, it sounds like the rot set in quite a while ago...

Also sounds like you'd be WAY better off!

Lidl do a good lasagne, jog on, sunshine!

I would seriously turn my phone off and just enjoy the holiday without giving him a second thought. GO back home via a friend's so you're not there on his return. Once you're back think over what you actually want to do but I bet you'll feel amazing after a few days without getting texts from him to worry about.

Yes - run. Run a million miles from this arsehole.

He's worried he's lost his skivvy - cook, cleaner, childminder etc etc.

Get out of this dreadful relationship.

He's using you.

He has no respect for you.

He really is a prize sack of shit.

Please tell us you won’t be sticking around for long once you get back?!

Run next week, this week you are on holiday. I would do some radio silence, minimal responses. He’s not your problem right now.

Also brilliant work! Please don’t get sucked back in to this user. Remember there’s a family do coming up that you’re not good enough to go on, and he’s organised holiday for his dc but will (now he’s scared of losing the unpaid skivvy) ‘treat’ you only if you do all the work. Remember he’s on holiday and didn’t want you there.

Well done for not backing down OP

He's making himself look even more like a twat

Wtf are you doing op? Stay strong and do not let him treat you like this. Lasagne my arse..he better get practicing.

Please for the love of god leave this arsehole. Do not believe what he says! And also swtich off your phone and enjoy your holiday. Or at least do not message him

Sounds like in his head he had this fantastic holiday with his children and how lovely it will be with family. Then they went on holiday and the dc keep mentioning how much you would like this, like that at whatever they are doing and he hates the fact they not all over him.

And then you drop the bombshell that instead of you moping around at home missing him, and looking forward to him coming home and worshipping at their arrival you went off on holiday by yourself and shock horror enjoying yourself.

I would make it very clear that you will not be cooking, cleaning when you get home and that he is responsible to washing all their holiday stuff.

I would also tell him that you do not anymore of the crappy text he sending you now he found out you are on holiday, as before he knew he was gloating about being holiday, and you will speak to him when you get home as you are to busy enjoying yourself in Croatia. Then ignore all messages from him.

Where ever you run in the world op your shit always goes with you.

Can I suggest before your next jaunt, you drop the shit you live with permanently, your mental suitcase will be soooo much lighter.

Send him a picture of a cold beer in response to his shitty night text

😂😂😂 at your "fuck off"

He is panicking that his slave is going to bugger off permanently so he thinks a weekend away will fix it. Sod him. Too little too late tbh. The home cooking and his night ruined again has shown he has learned the sum total of Fuck All.

I agree that you should switch your phone off and enjoy the rest of your fabulous holiday. Don't let the situation spoil your time there. You can spend some time on the return flight weighing up your options.

Very best wishes!

Stop messaging him back. Turn your phone off now till you are back and bloody enjoy your time away

Well done OP. Revenge is like a beer - served cold.

Your mum is missing you. Get over there ASAP and don’t rush back.

He is a total wankbadger isn’t he. If he wants a lasagne then he can make one because you won’t be there to do it.

Like others keep saying you can sort it out when you get home.

Enjoy your much deserved holiday.

So glad you've taken back control but a tinsy bit disappointed you aren't leaving as he gets back. Make sure you don't do all of their holiday washing and if you decide to LTB, make sure it's after your car has been replaced.

I agree, stop messaging him back, he still has the control. Switch your phone off. Remember the reason you went away.

Stop responding to his texts; it will drive him bonkers and absolutely ruin his holiday. And leave your phone in your room so you're not tempted to keep checking it while you're off enjoying yourself.

What a fantastic response! Have a wonderful holiday 😁

Totally agree with the last few posters.
It was a strong move to go on holiday but continuously messaging him and indulging his petulance, rubbing your face in it, pathetic attempt to placate you and attempts to put you right back in your box are a bad move.
I would text once “I’m not prepared to have you ruin my holiday, we’ll speak when I get home.”

Just tell him to enjoy his time with the kids and you speak when you get back - do not let him ruin this