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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Anyone on mumsnet actually like their MIL..?

191 replies

Tutulafromage · 27/07/2018 20:21

I do Grin
I have noticed that MIL’s get a bad rep on MN...anyone got any positives about their other half’s mother...?

OP posts:
DubaiismyBlackpool · 27/07/2018 21:39

Mines fabulous!
My flight today keeps on being delayed, but she's insisting on still coming to pick me up. My own mum doesn't treat me even half as nice as my lovely MIL.

schmoozypoo · 27/07/2018 21:40

My Mum is quite a good MIL, she respects boundrys, is helpful where she can be, loves my partner and treats her like a daughter, makes me so proud she is My Mum but My MIL is just distanced and that is hurtful but we get on well and she just doesn't see a problem.

butlerswharf · 27/07/2018 21:42

Not me

livelyredjellybean · 27/07/2018 21:42

Mine is amazing. We live in a caravan in their garden and both her and my FIL have been saints. They don’t interfere but offer plenty of support and help. MIL never judges and is genuinely amazing!

OliveOrTwist · 27/07/2018 21:44

Mines great! I see and confide in her more than my own mum. I do wish she'd call before visiting .....but we can't have it all Grin

ItsalmostSummer · 27/07/2018 21:44

From a distance yes.

EvaHarknessRose · 27/07/2018 21:44

Yes, but she has a good line in cutting comments if I do cross her.

TheCag · 27/07/2018 21:45

Yep, mine is lovely. We chose to move house to her village a few years ago to be close and I’m glad we did.

WineGummyBear · 27/07/2018 21:47

I love my MIL.

She's wonderful and kind and very natural and talented homemaker. She's so intuitive when it comes to children especially babies and preschoolers. I have learnt so much from her.

There are some things we don't see eye to eye and that's fine.

I enjoy her company and love her dearly. She takes such good care of us when she visits I've been know to cry when she leaves.

gabsdot · 27/07/2018 21:48

I love my MIL. She has always liked me and was very happy when DH and I decided to get married.
She's a great nana to my kids and has been an enormous help with baby sitting over the years.
When my first baby came along I was a bit clingy with him and didn't want her, or anyone to have too much of him but then I realised that my children can't have too many people who love them and they have strong relationships with all their grandparents which is great.
My own mother once told me that she would love to have the kind of relationships I have with my MIL with her own DILs. She gets of well with them all, (she has 3) but it's not the easy pally friendship that I have with my MIL.

TheFormidableMrsC · 27/07/2018 21:49

I've had 3 amazing MILS! I had a marriage when I was very young that I ended but my MIL was amazing and I was closer to her than my own mum. I bump into her occasionally and still miss her more than 25 years on. I had two MILS in my second marriage as ex-H had a stepmother from early childhood. His mum was lovely and I had a great relationship with her, she sadly died far too young. His stepmum and I took a while to grow our relationship but when we did, we were very close and she was my No 1 support when ex-h left me. I was so grateful to have her. Unfortunately, several years later, she decided that she wanted no further contact which took me a very long time to come to terms with. I still don't know why that was and it was exceptionally cruel in the way she did it. So, despite that, I feel that largely I have been very lucky and I read some of the stories on here and wonder how on earth anybody copes with an evil MIL!

ICJump · 27/07/2018 21:51

I do. She’s kind. Loved her son, loves me, loves her grandkids. She’s do anything she could to help without interfering. She also never points out my inconsistencies. Which I think is lovely quality in a mother in law.

Mammalamb · 27/07/2018 21:52

I do! She’s a lovely lady.
We lived with mil and fil for a while when we were saving for our first flat and I just moved to the area. They always gave us a lot of space

sar501 · 27/07/2018 21:53

Oh here we go - let’s all have a pop at the nasty dils who come on here to bitch about their mil’s and brag about how lovely our MIL’s are. Honestly if you had a mil like mine you wouldn’t be so smug...

AtomicGlitterBomb · 27/07/2018 21:54

I love my MIL, she is the reason DH is such a brilliant human.
She’s a wonderful mum and an amazing grandmother and we wouldn’t be without her.

Nannyplumshairstyle · 27/07/2018 21:56

I do like mine a lot in a kind of 'you're a flawed human just like the rest of us' way but I don't connect with her brilliantly well because her extreme snobbery is quite unappealing.

Belmo · 27/07/2018 22:07

Mine is fab, I love her :)

Aintnothingbutaheartache · 27/07/2018 22:10

I believe mine has sold her soul to the Devil and will outlive us all in an attempt to be as unpleasant as possible to as many people as possible.
She looks well on it tbf

purpleorchidwhite · 27/07/2018 22:12

I loved mine, she was my second mum and I saw her 2-3 times a week.
She died and I miss her terribly.

Not all MILs are awful.

OnlyTheWelshCanCwtch · 27/07/2018 22:12

Nope, went NC 3 years ago, and life is so much nicer

ThePrioryGhost · 27/07/2018 22:13

Mine is great. Sweet, unobtrusive, caring, brilliant with the kids, always happy to have them - i’m v lucky!

QOD · 27/07/2018 22:13

Yeah!! In fairness she’s dead.

ThePrioryGhost · 27/07/2018 22:15

FIL, however, is a massive prick and I’ve never met him because he was such a massive prick to DH that they’ve been NC for 20 years :(

mybumpisonlypudding · 27/07/2018 22:15

I always comment on these, but yes, mine is fab. I want to be her when I grow up Wink

PomBearWithoutHerOFRS · 27/07/2018 22:16

I've had three. The first was (and is) a bitch of the highest quality, her interference contributed in no small part to the break up.
My second was, and is, lovely. I wish her son ( and the rest of her children) had turned out better because she doesn't deserve the years of hurt they have brought her.
My third, my now DH's late mother, well, we were more or less indifferent to each other. She hated the fact that I had children before I got with DH, and made damn sure they (and me) were never ever considered part of the large extended family, but she was kind to my children with DH. Meh, I outlived her, I won Wink