Partner doesn't like sharing a bed

[camberskank]

AIBU to feel a bit sad about this? I completely get it. He likes space, he doesn't sleep well, he's 6ft3 and sleeps better on his own. He tells me he sleeps better on his own. I've been away with work all week and I know it has been bliss for him. He likely will be dreading having to share a bed again.

I don't snore, barely move at night and he simply finds it annoying not having much space. We don't have room for a bed bigger than a double.

I guess I just don't like that he doesn't like me being in bed with him. I'm 6 months pregnant and like knowing he's there next to me, he just lays there frustrated wishing I wasn't there. He's now resorted to sleeping on the sofa all the time.

AIBU to let this bother me? Can you still have a good relationship and sleep in separate rooms? Is this a normal way to feel?

Not sure if my hormones are getting to me or I'm feeling upset for good reason...

TBH I hate sharia bed dp does snore... I start in our bed then move once’s hes asleep as I wake to pee. In the morning I’m up before everyone anyway.
I love him but lack of sleep is s killer
In this heat sharing is also hell

I HATE sharing a bed (to sleep in ;) ) with my partner. I have difficult sleep hygiene and need to be on my own. I can see why you’d be upset but unless there’s something else to this, I’d suggest that this is just your DP attempting to maintain good sleep hygiene.

Also once’s babies here it might be easier for everyone for s whole Amy way... I found a lot of couples did this.

Get a bigger bed.

I am the same with my DH. Our marriage is a much happy place now we don't sleep together. It is hard to get your head round at first but once you get past the worry about what other people might think, it's fab. As you get older, you find more and more people have their own rooms.

I wouldn't be too offended at this OP. He feels the way he feels. I also really really hate sharing a bed and haven't for many years. Marriage is fine - we're both happy, sleep well in our own rooms - it's really not a problem

There's nothing else to it, he just hates sharing a bed and I hate the fact that I just lay there feeling guilty that he can't sleep. I don't think he sleeps as badly as he tells me though as I have been awake most of the night listening to him snore away so I do think he's exaggerating when he says he hasn't slept a wink (when I know he's fast asleep 5 mins after his head hitting the pillow!)

@WarPigeon read my post.

YES you can! Me and DH have this arrangement! He works shift and we used to wake teach other up... we had separate rooms for years till DS came along. Now we have a super king size bed with separate covers... Not ideal but still better than a double with one quilt.

Around 4 months into my pregnancy my husband started sleeping in our spare bedroom because I started snoring and was getting up during the night, I was quite upset by this at first but towards the end of my pregnancy I loved it! I could get up and move about as much as I wanted without worrying about waking him up.

Now that our daughter is here we sleep in separate rooms during the week when he has worked due to night feeds and he's back in our bed on the weekends.

I appreciate this isn't for everyone but it worked for us. We're the type of people that get grumpy with lack of sleep.

You do have to ensure that you put more effort in during the day/evening like a quick cuddle or just a kiss when your cooking dinner etc

I think it's just because he's so big and tall. We sadly don't have a spare room but I'm considering putting a small single in the nursery...

I have a king size and I want to get a super kind because I hate sharing too. I often end up on the sofa. I don’t sleep straight, I like to roll round a lot and star fish. Besides, my husband snores and no size bed can stop me hearing that.
Don’t be sad OP. I love my DH very much but I hate sharing my bed.

Separate rooms here too- we each have a double bed.

Bliss.

We have a brilliant relationship.

@RubyWho can you explain 'sleep hygiene'? I'm honestly baffled by what this means (and internally wondering if my own sleep hygiene is bad 😨).

I hate sharing a bed with anyone too. I think many marriages would be happier if people slept separately, because I actually think what your DH feels is common.

Also, OP, separate beds can be the saving of some marriages! (I'm thinking of my very loud snoring ex...he's not an ex because of 'good sleep hygiene' 😂)

A 6 months pregnant woman and a 6’3” man in a standard size double? In this heat?? Honestly, that sounds like torture.

I use to share a double with someone 6'4 and generally just a big person and it never bothered him. I'm 5'2 and slim (before getting knocked up and having a baby 3 months back).

We have a superking and each have our own duvets. Now the kids don't live here fulltime I sometimes sleep in DD1s room as ours is so hot and I'm going through the menopause. I like having DH there as he sleeps closest to the door so is designated waker-upper for water pouring through kitchen ceiling/intruders/the cat yowling to be fed

Oh God. Please listen to him. I absolutely hate sharing a bed with a partner, in fact I abjectly hope I never will again. I don't sleep too badly with a partner but it is NOTHING to the real depth of proper sleep I get on my own. You're already snippily saying you're lying awake listening to him snoring, grasp the fact that he doesn't regard bedsharing as essential with joy! I feel a bit panicky and breathless at the thought of losing my bed space ever again. Embrace your own bed, it may not be your first choice but surely you can find ways to make it enjoyable?

Could you get rid of your double bed and get 2 queen size beds beside each other? That way you'd still be sleeping beside each other but in your own beds.

Also by month 8 you'll be glad he's not there so you can use a gigantic pregnancy pillow. Js...

I like sleeping on my own at times, especially now due to the heat.
My DP is also 6'3 and we sleep together on weekends but separately in the week. It's done our relationship a world of good. I fidget a lot in the night, and so does he! So in the week when we have work, we sleep separately so one doesn't wake the other up! I wouldn't be too upset, as long as you're still intimate, I think it's okay to sleep separately x

DH and I had this arrangement when I was pregnant and before obviously. It was torturous. We have a super king now. Problem solved.

We would not be able to manage in a double bed. We have a king size and there’s still not enough acreage.