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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To treat my dog like one of the family?

159 replies

Everydayimsnugglin · 20/07/2018 15:09

My husband and I have a 2 year old son and a 3 year old dog. Growing up with dogs, they've always been treated like part of the family.

We're planning on a summer holiday to Southend and I was looking for dog friendly accommodations. My in laws (not dog people) feel that taking our dog on holiday with us is ridiculous and think he's a 'burden'. They've said today that he should be put in boarding kennels. I've NEVER used kennels and I feel that given my dog has always had company at home, it would be cruel to leave him in kennels. My husband and I have used at-home boarding when we got married. As my in laws are coming on holiday too so they do have a say.

Hubby and I are on the same page. We've said Were more than happy that they go off in the evening for dinners/ drinks etc if they'd like and leave us in as well have our son so wouldn't be doing late nights anyway. They've said it's unfair on our child that we're restricting his holiday enjoyment by bringing the dog.

Just after other people's opinions...

Thanks

OP posts:
Twooter · 22/07/2018 08:14

WW used to take our dog on holiday but got caught out on our honeymoon where we weren’t allowed to leave him in the house by unattended, and it was too hot to leave him in the car. We were restricted with which beach to go to, and could only let him off the lead high up in the mountains due to all the sheep around. With our current dog we looked round kennels, did lots of research and always put him in the same one which we’re comfortable with, and he knows and likes the people. When your dc gets older, you may find it harder to keep your holidays dog friendly as your dc will want more say over what you do.

NutElla5x · 22/07/2018 11:03

as your dc will want more say over what you do.
Then there's your chance to teach them about responsibility and what being a good dog owner is all about then.People should learn that there are drawbacks to having a dog as well as the benefits,just like there is in having children.Nobody forces you to have them, but if you do your duty is to put them first,it's as simple as that.

TooTrueToBeGood · 22/07/2018 11:08

You need to know who loves you more, the dog or the ILs. I suggest you lock them all in a dark cupboard for an hour and see who's pleased to see you when you let them out. Whoever that is, goes on the holiday.

mydogisthebest · 22/07/2018 11:20

NutElla5x, totally agree. I love my dogs to bits and no way would I be without a dog but of course there are drawbacks to having them. We can't just go away for a weekend unless we can either take the dogs or our lovely dog sitter is free.

We have a rule that our dogs are not left at home alone for more than 4 hours (5 absolute tops in some circumstances). That means a day out, trip to the theatre and meal etc all need planning. We have a couple of people who will sit in our house with the dogs but, obviously, we have to check they are free to do so.

When we take them on holiday we know our plans have to work round the dogs. We can't visit shops, National Trust properties, museums etc. Eating out is much easier nowadays but you are still restricted to somewhere that will either allow a dog inside or let you sit outside with them and not everywhere does.

We have had some holidays that have not been that great because we had a dog with us. One year a cottage in Wales in late September. They had a heatwave! We had a long haired dog who hated the heat.

No way would we leave our dog in a strange cottage so we stayed in all day every day with him for a week. The only times we ventured out was 6am and 11pm when we took him for a run on the beach.

Another holiday in July in Cornwall. Poured, and I mean poured, with rain every day. Should have been there for 7 days but gave up after 5. We got soaked every day, literally looked like us and the dog had stepped out of the shower. So each time after a walk, drying off, complete change of clothes and drying the dog which took about 2 hours.

We couldn't visit museums or art galleries or even shops to keep out of the rain but that is all part and parcel of having a dog.

InDubiousBattle · 22/07/2018 17:07

Tootrue I'm assuming you're being sarcastic! You're not seriously comparing the love parents have for their child and grandchild is even remotely comparable to that a pet has for its owner!

TopShagger · 22/07/2018 18:25

Haven't read everything, so this may well have been said already but here's my take on it -

If you voluntarily elect to have a dog, that dog IS part of your family. It will be every bit as attached to you as a child, in many (not ALL) ways it's like having a child. And likewise, you will, or SHOULD have the same attachment to the dog as it has to you. If you aren't capable of having such a connection with a dog, you should not have one, Having a dog is not compulsory.

I really see no point in having a pet of any kind, much less a social one like a dog, and not really giving a hoot as to how the dog feels about situations.

Your in laws will be aware of why you want to take the dog, because you can communicate with them on that level (provided they're human) - the dog will have no idea why you would leave it behind, won't be aware that you'll return and will likely be miserable. With dog comes much responsibility, people who aren't prepared to shoulder that much responsibility should, quite simply, not have dogs.

With all that in mind, take the dog, if your inlaws don't like it that'll be their problem.

He is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog. You are his life, his love, his leader. He will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart. You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion.

Sadly, I'm unable to find the original author of the above quote, I saw it on a calendar once. Dog people will understand this, not-dog-people will not. And there's little we can do about that unfortunately.

TooTrueToBeGood · 22/07/2018 21:39

InDubiousBattle Get a grip. If you can't spot such an obvious joke you really do have a serious problem.

InDubiousBattle · 22/07/2018 22:23

Grip got! Apologies all round

TooTrueToBeGood · 23/07/2018 17:30

Sorry for my tone InDubious, i could have made the point without being so caustic. Apologies back at you.

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