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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU - wasteful husband in holiday

157 replies

trinity0097 · 18/07/2018 06:29

We are in holiday, only DH has got drinks. At breakfast everything is a buffet, other than hot drinks, which they take an order for at the table. He always just asks for coffee. They bring a flask of coffee and a jug of milk. He only ever has black coffee. The milk goes to waste. He gets annoyed if I asked him to only ask for black coffee so that they don’t waste the jug of milk.

Am I being unreasonable, after 9 days to be able to expect him to do this, rather than me having to intervene and ask for black coffee only? He only has to say ‘black coffee please’ rather than ‘coffee please’ - it’s not onerous!

OP posts:
Storm4star · 18/07/2018 08:04

What would drive me nuts on a family is my OH slinking off to their phone and bitching about me over a complete non issue

^ This!
I agree with a pp. This should definitely win pettiest thread award. Just enjoy your holiday for goodness sake.

BadLad · 18/07/2018 08:06

Am I being unreasonable, after 9 days to be able to expect him to do this, rather than me having to intervene and ask for black coffee only? He only has to say ‘black coffee please’ rather than ‘coffee please’ - it’s not onerous!

What has happened in the previous eight days? Did you intervene, or sit there and seethe?

GreatDuckCookery6211 · 18/07/2018 08:08

Good lord OP.

If you're there when he orders his coffee just butt in and say " no milk please " if it bothers you that much.

ravenmum · 18/07/2018 08:10

Make a big show of getting up, fetching a bowl of cereal and pouring the milk over it, sighing and saying "Well, I didn't want cereal, but we can't let that go to waste, can we?" then eat it very slowly in front of your husband while he Googles divorce lawyers.

Balibabe1 · 18/07/2018 08:10

Why not just spill it?

Your upset is now justified

lrh3891 · 18/07/2018 08:11

ravenmum Grin

CherryPavlova · 18/07/2018 08:15

When did you start being this angry? Do you always get to angry about nothingness? Do you have one of those toothpaste tube winders to enable you to use every last drop?
There’s is no internishortage of milk. You’re overthinking.

Ansumpasty · 18/07/2018 08:16

*happypoobum

You hate him don't you? grin

Have a nice holiday.*

My thoughts exactly Grin

I bet his loud breathing is irritating you and let’s not get started on the way he chews. He even walks funny. Bastard

LEELULUMPKIN · 18/07/2018 08:16

Way more to this story than milk. Come on OP spill. Not the milk obviously.

Bluelady · 18/07/2018 08:17

LTB

aperolspritzplease · 18/07/2018 08:20

Doesn't sound like he makings for a great holiday.

I am dreading my kids hitting the AI buffet next week, they always think they want more than they can physically eat.

MarianneAgain · 18/07/2018 08:22

I notice the OP hasn't been back.....

I understand where she's coming from as far as not wasting food is concerned. people who have the attitude "I've paid for it so it's my own business if I want to waste it" really annoy me - natural ressources, cost to the environment, starving children in Africa and all that. Wasting food is a really selfish thing to do and I think it probably does show a difference in core values - I don't think I'd have married a bloke with this character trait - DH and I come from the same kind of family background so have similar values.
In the OP's position I would probably jump in as soon as the waiter / waitress came to take the order and say "black coffee for my husband please - don't bring milk, thank you" if he can't be bothered to remember to say it himself.

QueenoftheNights · 18/07/2018 08:27

It won't be hot milk.

The jug will be taken back to the kitchen and brought out for another person.

Simples.

UneMoonit · 18/07/2018 08:30

YABU.

I would get annoyed if I was trying to enjoy morning coffee on holiday (a moment of carefree relaxation, no work day ahead etc.) and someone started policing me.

Loopytiles · 18/07/2018 08:31

YABU. If you are genuinely worried about “waste” don’t fly or stay in hotels!

edwinbear don’t be a martyr. Not good for you, your relationship or your DC.

Iamtryingtobenicehere · 18/07/2018 08:32

Pick your battles op. A jug of milk on the breakfast table really isn’t a drama!

CrabappleBiscuit · 18/07/2018 08:36

If you are worried about waste what do you think happens to all th3 food left over.?.

Also surely you’d take it in turns to take kids up to supervise/help with breakfast buffet...or one kid each.

Treacletoots · 18/07/2018 08:36

And I thought posting about my bins was a non issue...

Just get a divorce. You obviously don't really like him any more and it will save you years of milk related angst.

MsHomeSlice · 18/07/2018 08:36

I expect the OP is far too busy going the whole nine yards like Michael Douglas in Falling Down to come back an update

The waste of a half cup of milk is the trigger!

strawberrisc · 18/07/2018 08:45

YANBU. I was raised to not waste food and all inclusive holidays are the worst. People pile their plates then leave so much waste or fill their bags with extras.

My Granddad was starved in the Second World War. He was overly generous with food but his motto was always 'take what you want, but eat what you take'.

OuchLegoHurts · 18/07/2018 08:49

Give the poor man a break

MrsJayy · 18/07/2018 08:51

Maybe go for a week next holiiday seems 9 days is too long and you have reached your limit Grin

BarbaraofSevillle · 18/07/2018 08:52

Yes, a bit of milk in an AI hotel is probably a drop in the ocean as far as waste is concerned. Loads of food will probably get thrown away and people will also probably eat far more than they would normally, which is also wasteful if you think about it, but it's the way things are, I'm not sure how things will change while AI hotels and the concept of choice and plentifulness exists.

It would annoy me too, but I'd probably just let it go, for the sake of my blood pressure.

I was annoyed in a hotel (not AI) when I asked for some brown sauce to go on my breakfast and the waiter squirted quite a large amount into a ramekin to give to me. Most of what he gave me would probably have got wasted and I would have been perfectly happy with the bottle but obviously that is not the done thing in a naice place where they do things properly.

Whatsforu · 18/07/2018 08:54

I would be happy that I was on holiday!!!! As many pp have indicated don't sweat the small stuff, get off your phone and enjoy the fact you are on holiday.

Shortstuff08 · 18/07/2018 08:57

really annoy me - natural ressources, cost to the environment, starving children in Africa and all that. Wasting food is a really selfish thing to do and I think it probably does show a difference in core values -

Except the OP is happily on an all inclusive holiday where there is tons of waste and the attitude you describe.

So there isn't a difference in the ops core values and her dhs.

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