What MNisms irrationally annoy you?

[wellBeehivedWoman]

I know IABU to complain about something so petty but I don't care. Come and share your trivial mumsnet annoyances! What phrases / abbreviations / MN colloquialisms drive you crazy? I'll start:

1. Any time anyone uses the phrases 'boobing', 'boobed' etc when referring breastfeeding. Not only does this give me a mental image of a clown squirting milk from a comedy flower in their lapel, it also has a kind of juvenile, jolly-hockeysticks false cheer that makes me want to die.

1. Pg as an abbreviation of pregnant. No idea why I hate this. Maybe because it doesn't really resemble the full word? Irrationally despise it.

1. 'Little one' instead of baby or child. Too twee to be allowed. V similar to the phrase 'our little family', usually used when someone has a new baby and wants the equivalent of a papal enclave to keep friends and family at arms length. Absolutely loathesome because I am a grumpy and unreasonable cow

Any others that really wind you up?

@SalemBlackCat

The thing with the English language is that so many words are regional and slang expressions are also age related so older people and younger people often don't get phrases that other people use.

Regarding the grammar aspect that you refer to 'I was sat/stood' , again, there are many local variances of how people speak so although we may all know correct written English for business use, if we are telling a story it might be written down as we would tell it verbally.

There are occasionally threads on here where regional expressions/ pronunciations are discussed and they do vary depending on where people live.

I've just spotted the word smellies on another thread. It's fucking awful. Tbf though I've heard it in real life too so it's not just an MNism!

Virtue signalling disguised as an aibu.

You just know they are a massive pain up the arse in RL

All the abbreviations for family members, ALL of them, and gratuitous swearing, and all the little pat phrases that get repeated over and over. Actually all the abbreviations for anything

When people start a phrase and then trail off, with a “Mumsnetters will understand” and a wink or smug smiley face.

So gloaty, exclusive and cliquey. Makes my blood boil.

To reiterate: darked on.

It never was funny. Ever.

Just seen another thread with “Ddad”, please stop with this madness!

Oh, another one, "it doesn't sit right with me". GRAARRGH!

Famalam or My little famalam
Making Memories (more FB than MN though)
Worst still: Making memories with my little famalam

Lush

Hun

Of an evening? Really? Have never come across this expression before.

Someone posting scene-setting directions on a thread, eg 'waves to XYZ, makes room on bench, proffers some digestives'.

Anything described as 'lush', or worse still 'twas/tis lush'.

And I know it's been said previously, but 'food of the gods' - usually to describe some vile concoction like a bean, cheese and marmalade sandwich.

I dislike the casual diagnosing by random posters of various mental health problems & personality disorders!

Famalam makes me want to vomit.

Hands I remember getting almost violent with people on the school run who would tell me to ‘put my feet up’ and ‘don’t work too hard’ when I had been running around all day whilst pregnant. Never was such a passive aggressive way of saying ‘everything you do is worthless’ seriously unless you’re offering to help. Shut up

I find these threads really tedious. Same old same old being moaned about. There must be one every month at least.

I find these threads really tedious. Same old same old being moaned about
I find 'but i have the right to peaceful enjoyment of my garden and by that i mean silence' threads dull.
I find 'can my neighbour claim this part of the road even though they chose to get a property without parking")' threads tedious.
I find 'DH spoke to a woman at work and they've been seen in a group of a dozen colleagues together. He's totes having an emotional affair OP. LTB before it turns physical. Get your ducks in a row and LTB.' threads ridiculous.

But you know what, I don't turn up and go 'omg what a stupud thread. People always ask the same things'

Touched a nerve?

No. Just questioning why anyone would go onto a thread they think is pointless and take the time to write a goady reply expressing how pointless they think a thread is.

“Didn’t want to read and run”

Honestly, just fucking read and run. You are offering nothing. Nothing.at.all.

Jesus it could be someone whose just had the shit beaten out of her by cunt of a boyfriend, and people come on saying “I’ve nothing useful or constructive to say but didn’t want to read and run ..” such a fucking flippant attitude to a poster in serious difficulties.
From the tone/lack of seriousness of the responses you’d think she’d just complained of her cat having fleas or something.

ok this is definitely a post about a specific and current thread

Seriously, feel free to piss off - or do you just want to see your name up there at the top of the thread?
A thread which will obviously run and run?

I second that ^ who gives a shit if you read and run? You don't need to say. It's not like your name is highlighted on the thread saying that you opened it and left.

Babywearing
Makes me feel sick every time I hear it or read it.
You can’t wear a baby!!! You simply can’t, you wear a top or coat or trousers
A baby?! NO

LO for little one
actually most of these acronymns DD DF etc
"are you on glue" is just rude

the way that on MN white people can never be victims of racism

"give your head a wobble" where did that experession originate from?? just odd.

the way so many things are appropriation these days- eg cultural appropriation, men appropriating things from women etc...there is a thread on how men are appropriating PND from women!!!

cocklodger- what is a cocklodger?