What MNisms irrationally annoy you?

[wellBeehivedWoman]

I know IABU to complain about something so petty but I don't care. Come and share your trivial mumsnet annoyances! What phrases / abbreviations / MN colloquialisms drive you crazy? I'll start:

1. Any time anyone uses the phrases 'boobing', 'boobed' etc when referring breastfeeding. Not only does this give me a mental image of a clown squirting milk from a comedy flower in their lapel, it also has a kind of juvenile, jolly-hockeysticks false cheer that makes me want to die.

1. Pg as an abbreviation of pregnant. No idea why I hate this. Maybe because it doesn't really resemble the full word? Irrationally despise it.

1. 'Little one' instead of baby or child. Too twee to be allowed. V similar to the phrase 'our little family', usually used when someone has a new baby and wants the equivalent of a papal enclave to keep friends and family at arms length. Absolutely loathesome because I am a grumpy and unreasonable cow

Any others that really wind you up?

"Go and educate yourself" along with "it's not my job to educate you" seemingly from the same sort of people who demand "link?" and "source?" whenever anyone mentions anything they don't want to listen to. You can bet your ass any source you do provide will be decried as inferior, irrelevant or just stupid.

The thing that really makes me grit my teeth are long, long, looooong semi-legalese text messages that posters take it upon themselves to compose on behalf of the OP, regardless of whether the dispute is to do with parking, failure to respond to a child's birthday invitation, perceived slights or attempted manslaughter. They often end 'Regards', even if the recipient is the OP's mother.

For some reason 'boobing the baby' always makes me picture the poster geting her breasts out and repeatedly slapping the baby over the head with them. Like elbowing, but with boobs.

😂

It's official, no good can come of this phrase.

“Wait, what.” It’s so contrived.

My husband has a hobby, think cycling. I have a job, think retail. I usually have dinner on Tuesday, think pasta. I like sunny holidays, think Spain. I have a vulva, think vagina.

Just fucking tell us! This whole 'think' nonsense is tedious

Chinny reckon is surely a 80s/90s childhood thing! Not a MN thing.

Shamelessly placemarking 🤢🤢🤢 (vom)

Chinny reckon was a 70’s thing in London linked to former Match Of The Day host, Jimmy Hill

Chinny reckon!

My husband has a hobby, think cycling

Nooo!! It's "My husband has a hobby, can't say what as it's too outing"

Though saying that, I'm completely in agreement about the 'think' oddity.

That fucking biscuit thing when someone doesn’t agree with the post.

I understand the hobby thing. If people have shared their area, job, DC ages, their hobby and DH's hobby then I can imagine it would be easy to out them.

I used to work with someone who did LARPing with real swords and owned their own machete. If their DH was a Mumsnetter then sharing their DH's hobby could have been outing. Or maybe it's common, but I've never met or heard of a grown man who does dress up sword battles since working with him.

So old and boring now.
Overuse of 'livid'.
Picky tea.
And I'd tried to forget I'd ever heard 'tinned toms' but unfortunately someone mentioned it up thread and now I feel all unsettled.

I never thought I'd see the day, but have spotted a distressing number of lols recently

T'would never have been tolerated Back In The Day, I tell you

MaisyPops, I'd understand if it were a hobby like that, but 99% of the outing hobbies are cycling or golf. Neither of which is particularly unusual.

True stripy but I suppose we never know.
LARPing was a new one on me. I always associated it with socially awkward weirdos, not vaguely normal colleagues (yes that makes me sound awful. I'm not really )

Haaaa! Chinny reckon

This accompanied by a playground stroke of the chin when you suspected someone of telling porkies.
still use it occasionally now along with Gordon Bennett

Chinny reckon is still a good one.

I recognised someone because she talked about playing tennis. I've never told her I know it's her and I read through her posts

If she had just written "hobby", I don't think I would have clicked.

Most of mine have been covered.

‘to the woman in asda who was horrible to me’ threads
picky bits to munch on
drop them a note/text saying ‘insert ridiculous bollocks nobody would ever say’
The ‘outing’ hobby which is always cycling
What’s for tea threads should be renamed Come and post the ponciest food you can think of

Don't forget Redcrayons there's bonus points for mentioning it is homemade poncy food. The more food items you put homemade in front of, the better.

Or my particular favourite ‘from scratch’

Not an mnism but the recent trend for open letters is very irritating

@StealthPolarBear yes they are SO naff.