Naked DH/neighbour complaint

[How2Support]

So - DH spent overnight yesterday alone. (Me and DC away for night). It is very warm where we are and he has no inhibitions about being naked. He spent most of the day either naked or in shorts, had a couple of showers to cool himself off. Slept with windows and curtains open.

A neighbour from across the road has just approached me to say that DH was 'deliberately' walking around naked. I said I wan't surprised he was naked and was she sure it was 'deliberate' (I thought she meant making eye contact with her/touching himself for e.g. but didn't ask for details - I was thrown by the approach). She thought it was deliberate/exhibitionist (can't remember wording). I said I would speak to him.

I asked DH if anything happened. He was confused, insisted he didn't do anything inappropriate and he was just hot and was enjoying the freedom to wander around "free and easy" . He is really upset and embarrassed. I think he was daft to wander around naked at front with curtains open (we have full height floor to ceiling windows) but don't believe he did anything sinister.

AIBU to think he should apologise to neighbour?

Or should he just quietly suffer in his own embarrassment (and draw the fucking curtains next time).

For wider context I have quite bad anxiety (on medication and awaiting CBT for it) so have difficulty gauging when something is a big deal or it is my thoughts spinning out of control (I was upset when I spoke to him and am finding it really difficult that the neighbours are thinking DH is a creep the minute me and DC are away). DH has been struggling with depression over the last couple of years and is very introverted.

The neighbour does seem to have put some serious effort in.

She saw and was offended by the 'cock and balls' in question and then continued to check throughout the day to make sure she remained offended.

Might I suggest if she was traumatised she might have decided to look away at some point during the day?

I'd tell the woman to mind her own business and stop looking in other people's windows. Nothing wrong with being unclothed in your own house.

Yes, that’s exactly right. “I wouldn’t bat an eyelid” does indeed translate to “I love staring at cock and balls all day

Ha! Touché made me laugh. 🤣

Cmon seriously, spending All day naked in your room with floor to ceiling windows that a row of terrace houses face and everyone can see into. If anyone says that's ok or normal then it's fine they like it, but it doesn't mean the rest of us are prudish because we don't want to see our neighbours genitalia when we look out our windows or their bare arses.

And as for those blaming the neighbour, it's always the woman's fault eh?

"Why exactly was she looking?"

They have floor to ceiling windows, sounds like it would be hard for her not to look. Are you saying people should live with their backs to the windows because their neighbours want to be naked with the curtains open?

There is a difference between looking at the 'cock and balls' with sufficient intent to be offended and just glancing up.

Is this is about sex, I walk round naked, would the neighbour complain about me? Is it her sexism assuming men are all sexual predators?

Perhaps he should open the window and let his cock rest on the windowsill to catch a nice breeze? Yes, yes, the street may be full of playing children, but it's his own home after all.......

What a point-missing, stupid thing to say.

Yeah. See I found the cock on the window sill comment funny and very to the point. If he can be in front of the window with it out, why can't he lean it on the ledge? What's the big difference?

I walk round naked, would the neighbour complain about me? Is it her sexism assuming men are all sexual predators?

If you were walking about in front of your full length windows butt naked all day I'd probably complain about you. I would not wish to have to avoid looking out my window and if I did, be treated to a view of your bare ass or bush every time. So yeah I'd complain and want you to cover it up.

I am sorry but walking around naked when other people can see you is not ok. Especially with floor to ceiling windows.

Bluntness100 my butt would offend you, but would you assume that I was a sexual predator?

Naked does not mean sexual.

Regardless of our views on nudity, as the law stands, if someone complained, especially after mentioning it to a family member previously, a prosecution could happen. So the OPs husband needs to have a towel around him or wear shorts, or close the curtains.

Interesting... a friend of mine complained to local police that she saw a man standing naked in his front window as she went past. The police said that as he was inside his own home & just standing there, he had every right to do it and she shouldn’t be looking into people’s windows.

Unless your DH has severe learning difficulties, then by chosing to leave the curtains open and standing naked by floor to ceiling windows he is making the deliberate choice to expose his genetalia. Presumably he must enjoy doing so, but it is unacceptable and antisocial behaviour. I'd be reporting it to the police if it happens again, especially since he now knows it causes offence, so no excuses. A quick naked dash to the loo or to find some pants is very, very different to a man parading all day and all night naked in front of an uncurtained floor to ceiling window. I can't believe anyone is actually trying to justify this behaviour.

I'm not sure I'd think you were a sexual predator I'd assume exhibitionist.

And jimmers, that's total bs and we all know it. 🤣

Op do you live in a flat? Opposite a row of terraced houses?

Not only are posters justifying this behaviour..... we do it too.

Yes in our own homes we walk around naked. We sit naked on chairs and, perverts that we are, watch TV naked.

I don't cook naked though.

It's not about the law, it's about consideration for other people.

In fact I'm naked now.......

You shouldn't be involved in any apology or policing your DH's future behaviour. You are not his mum and he is an adult with free will. Don't make him do anything. Pass the complaint on to him and let him decide what to do.

If you entirely ignore the part of my post that said no he wouldn't risk it if there were children anywhere near....but hey you read what you want to and make up assertions in accordance

Moose, no one has an issue with nudity, it's full Nudity for a prolonged period where people can see you that's under discussion. Plenty of folks are nakedin their own homes, we all are at some point or another, so what, the issue is if you're naked in front of floor to ceiling windows all day long.

Unless you're saying your naked in front of full length windows right now, and you've a row of terraced houses oppposite who can all see in, and you have made eye contact with them, then really no one gives a shit.

Op dh must be endowed to freak show levels (or at least a show-er more than a grow-er ).

Any naked men I’ve ever seen* would have to be, at a distance, doing the windmill, or at least having a fiddle for me to identify, see and be offended by their ‘cock and balls’.

It all just kind of hangs there quite innocent unless it is aroused. I just don’t get why anyone is going to be offended by that.

*no that doesn’t mean that all my partners have had micro-dicks.

@bluntness... nope it happened.
I’m a natural ‘looker’ nosy cow when walking past houses & that cured me

“and you have made eye contact with them“

Say what now? Where was that little drip that I missed?

Are people really that offended at seeing a naked person? It's just a body! Why all the pearl clutching about children glimpsing a body? Why would that be bad?