To think most men past the age of 30 suffer from ED?

[NCLady]

Hi all, I NCed for this as it is a bit of an embarrassing topic, but I am a regular poster.

I'll go straight to the point: is it just me being incredibly unlucky, or is ED really really frequent in men over the age of 30?

I am 29 and until a couple of years ago I never slept with a man who had issues with getting it up/ keeping it up/ finishing. I pretty much took it for granted! But in the last few years I dated 4 different men around the age of 30/35 and all of them had some sort of ED issues!

Mostly they could never finish, which I am sure must be really frustrating for a man. Manual or oral stimulation didn't fix the problem either.

I stopped dating all 4 of them partially because of this issue, because it felt like our sexual life wasn't working (on top of other things I was not happy with). None of these flings made it to a proper relationship level, so I never felt like we had the intimacy and trust to talk about the problem openly. With two of them I tried to approach the subject very tactfully, I mostly got defensive reactions and random excuses, so I just dropped it.

Now I started going out with lovely New Guy a few weeks ago, all was well, great attraction and chemistry, awesome compatibility, we went back to his and... SAME PROBLEM! At this stage we slept together 5 times, and he did not manage to finish once. I think I can safely assume there is a regular issue there, and it wasn't a one-off. I feel so disheartened.

Is it me being incredibly unlucky or do I just have to accept that most men past the age of 30 have these issues?

My former FWB never got rock-hard either, which was something I'd not encountered before. He didn't appear to think that was out of the ordinary.

Not rtft but My DP is 51 and in 11 years has never had this problem. (I've probably jinxed it now though!)
He isn't a big porn user.

Only ever had this once with a v nervous 20something year old. Never with multiple other partners in their 30s. Sorry you’ve had a run of bad luck. Could be alcohol, ADs or just too much porn. What else is common to these guys? Are they all gamers for instance, or are you meeting men who’ve not been in relationships before? Just trying to tease out what you could change to diversify dating pool.

DH is 36, he's never had a problem.

TBF though he doesn't watch porn and hardly masturbates. It seems like porn and excessive wanking/death grip could be the culprit!

Yep, I’ve experienced this too. Extremely frustrating on both parts (especially when you’re TTC)

My husband is 53 and everything works just fine

I think you've been unlucky. I've only seen it in a 40 year old man. He had problems getting hard and then staying hard, occasionally coming too soon.

My husband is 41 and definitely has no issues! Maybe just bad luck or like others say aggressive masturbated. I know before I met my husband 10 years ago he masturbated a lot, it didn’t affect him but I can see how it could affect some men.

Aggressive masturbation cause ED? Never in all my born days have I heard such poppycock.
Everyman you ever met has been spanking his monkey since age 13....multiple times a day. Death grip? WTAF is that....No man grips himself so hard as to inflict pain....Unless he has a peculiar fetish in which case explore that.
The more likely reason are:
Drug use
Alchol use
Stress
Eliminate these three factors and you will have any man whatever his age rigid!

ED is a problem for men who watch porn.

It might be for some, but certainly isn't for others!

Ive has sex with multiple men over the age of 40 and I’m assuming all masturbated and watched porn. Never ever known this to be a problem. Very odd that you’ve encountered it a few times. Maybe you make men nervous with your experience and expectation? Are they suffering performance anxiety?

www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/320265.php

There you go. Masturbation does not cause ED.
although it may cause loss of sensitivity.

No issues with current DP or previous over the age of 30 - only probably once when blind drunk.

You've been unlucky . My dp is over 40 and has never had that issue. Only thing I can think of is do they all have drink/ drug issues?

I'm a single guy in my late 30s, had a few short term relationships and a couple one night stands etc etc. Never had this issue, often the direct opposite actually but that's a different matter. I don't really use porn much though.

How useful my post is I'll let you decide. Lok

My dh is in his his 60's. Prior to our marriage the previous partners I've had were 40, 41 and 36. No problems with any of them.

My DH is 40 and has no issues with or without a condom. The only time he had problems was when he was taking anxiety meds and they removed his libido - he could still get it up, keep it up and finish he just wasn't interested very often!

Wrong man.

Never had this problem. My current partner is 52 and I joke with him i’ll have to start putting bromide in his tea!

It's NEVER been my experience with men past 30.

Perhaps it is a combination of factors: antidepressants, porn, obesity, alcohol, drugs etc....
Friends dh was smoking weed and his sperm apparently swam around in circles...according to the fertility clinic!
Maybe humanity is just going to die out!

Maybe humanity is just going to die out!

One can only hope.

Mine is 34 has no problems at all :)
I think porn use too
My ex was 36 and a heavy porn user and struggled to keep it up and finish. I don't miss his crap shagging/lying next to me wanking at all.

My husband is 39 never noticed any sort of ED , early 30s are the internet porn generation though so that may be the problem .

Darth Gosh that sounds grim

This is so interesting. I’m also married so prob not relevant to the discussion but would 100% guess it was porn related. Makes you wonder about the potential sexual dysfunction of a whole generation.