To think you shouldn’t shame consenting adults for having sex?

[ChunkyMonkey4321]

I recently moved to a new build estate and joined a Facebook group for it. Usually it’s just ‘did anybody else’s bins not get taken today?’ ‘Has anyone seen my cat’ etc etc. Today there was a post from a man saying: ‘did anybody else hear a woman making certain noises last night? (frowny face) If I could hear then children could have heard, hardly appropriate is it? Close the window love’

AIBU to think:
1: he’s shaming a woman, she probably wasn’t alone. He could have also told her partner to close the window!
2: she may well have had children of her own in the house. Or does nobody with children have sex?? (Sarcasm)

I’m going to spend the rest of the day wondering ‘who IS Brenda’s daddy?’

Ah, barbarianmum I agree I don’t like hearing people taking a dump

YABU.

It sounds like the woman was the one making noises that carried out the open window, not the man. And no, kids shouldn't hear you having sex, there's no need for "noises".

Is it about you OP?

YABU. Same goes for loud music when windows are open, massive arguments, etc etc.
No one wants to what that stuff.
And if my 11 year old walked past he would know exactly what it was. “I don’t know.” Wouldn’t wash. And he shouldn’t have to hear it.

So, genuine question - what do you do here? I mean aside from doing a rain dance in the hope that rain will come and they'll keep their windows shut, or at least we could shut ours.

he’s shaming a woman, she probably wasn’t alone. He could have also told her partner to close the window!

Presumably he's mentioned the woman, because that's who he can hear.

What is all this talk of 'shaming'? I hate silly nonsensical newfangled terms. If something makes a person feel ashamed maybe that's because they are doing something they know they shouldn't be doing. Or else they care too much about what other people think. If you're happy with your actions and choices the opinions of others should be like water off a duck's back.

No one even knows if it was sex noises. Some people wail and howl when they are having nightmares; someone having some uncomfortable physical procedure done (IDK, cleaning a wound, physio exercises etc) or even someone who has just stubbed a toe on a table leg might make loud moaning sounds.
This person sounds like a childish, spiteful dick.

'take it Brenda, who's your Daddy'

Justvent if someone had a massive argument with the windows open, would you go on Facebook and say ‘did anyone else hear that couple having a domestic last night?’

there's no need for "noises"

Silent sex? How dull.

People should learn that their noise can be heard by others and to have some.considerstion.

Not just sex but music, laughter, chattering, doors closing, cars starting, bikes starting, kids screaming etc..
Come 10.30pm ish these noises should be kept to a minimum. But people are cunts and they couldn't give a fuck about their impact on others.

Haha bombardier

YABU. There is no reason to force other people to listen to your sex noises. Either be quiet or close the window. This isn't about shaming people for having sex, this is shaming people for being inconsiderate.

Silent sex? How dull.

When there's a possibility kids could hear you, yeah. There's no need for loud moaning etc.

@bombardier have you actually had sex? Quiet or even silent sex is pretty normal and can be lovely. Absolutely no need for noises.

Adults should not need to be told to close their windows and have a bit of self respect and consideration for their neighbours. If you want to have sex porn-style, move to a place in the middle of nowhere with no close neighbours.

If the guilty woman is ashamed by the post, then she should be ashamed for making the noise.

The usual solution is to loudly encourage the woman, or the couple if she wasn't alone, and cheer and clap their performance.

"take it Brenda, who's your Daddy"

Why am I thinking of Victoria Wood all of a sudden?

Honestly? There's absolutely no need to be so loud having sex that your neighbours can hear you. It's exhibitionism.
People who think it's ok for children to hear them having sex are disgusting.

Do you know who the woman is?

YANBU I would be leaving or un-following this facebook group. You can debate the rights and wrongs of having loud sex in a built up area until the cows come home but to me the issue here is someone referring to it on a social platform like this and shaming the person because I am sure the neighbour and other neighbours knows who he is talking about. That is where my issue would be not with the person who got a bit carried away in the moment

This.

Unfollow. Tell people why if they ask.

Why am I thinking of Victoria Wood all of a sudden?

Snap

What kind of unsatisfactory sex are y’all having if you can remain silent?!

If they’re exhibitionists then they’d probably love people cheering them on. Maybe they got caught up in the moment, didn’t plan on it happening to didn’t get chance to close the window and I don’t know if it was porn style or just ‘uh uh uh’ noises.

It’s the going on Facebook that’s the issue. If I’d come on here saying ‘aibu to think people should have sex as loudly as they like with no regard for anybody else?’ Then yes I’d be unreasonable but going on Facebook, honestly. I doubt he was a stallion

It is pretty rude and antisocial. Plenty of people manage to have enjoyable sex without alerting the entire neighbour, there is absolutely no need. I'm not a prude and don't care what people get up to in their homes, but that sort of thing is just showing off and if they are going to behave like that and inflict it on their neighbours then I don't have a problem with someone having a Facebook rant.
I've seen people Facebook rant about dogs barking, garden equipment, arguing, driving, if someone is knowingly loudly sharing that they are having sex why is that any different?