to get annoyed by parents bragging about their kids on FB

[Neffertitty]

I know FB is a place where you should be able to say whatever you want to but there are a couple of parents at my DS's school who have to do a long braggy monologue about their kids acheivements and what treat they will be buying them and how proud they are.

This is not for the kids, it's to brag to other parents "Oh I am so clever producing such supremely talented and clever beings".

My DS does ok but at times struggles and it's a constant battle trying to get him through the school year. He never wins any prizes at school, is never top of the class. He feels it at prizegivings and it affects his confidence. I know there are clever kids out there and good for them but it's really tough having it shoved down your throat on FB.

I realise the answer is to block them but I just needed a rant before I do that!!

My DD is top of her year group, exceptional bright and leaps and bounds above her classmates.
I never ever boast about her on Facebook with regards to academic achievements.
Some of my friends children have learning difficulties, autism and some are simply trying their best at school but not that bright. I’m aware I’m blessed with a very academically gifted child and I praise her at home, but it’s nice to be humble. People don’t need it pointing out that “my kid does this better than yours”.
There’s so much more that is praise worthy, I’m more likely to share a story about her doing something kind because everyone is capable of that IYSWIM.

Being proud is fine... what i hate is parents bragging and posting just for the reflected glory, likes and attention for themselves also those attempting to show a perfect family children on fb,in my experience being “good on fb” means things probably arent good at all...
One fb friend posted how lovely her dc was buying her some chocolate from the shop...during that week i know her dc had fucking terrorised children in his class, saying truly horrible things and making kids lives a misery. But on fb, dc is “kind, sweet, lovely”... cue lots of “well done hun he’s a credit to you”
“Well done babe”

and a big pat on the back to her for raising such a boy terrorist
This is an ongoing issue with her dc btw... 5 years and the school stil havent got to grips with it... he has no SN, just a wee bully it seems.

*exceptionally

To be clear, I'm not jealous or bitter - I am happy to comment and say "well done" to any of my friends' children for their achievements and successes.

Yes, maybe the fact that my DS's report was less than glowing didn't help when I saw her post yesterday. It's just the constant stream of them - always about how talented they are - the odd one here and there and I'd be clicking the like button or whatever but its too much.

We love our son, we praise him, he knows we are proud of him and we tell our family (and very close friends) about his acheivements - sometimes in front of him.

Disclaimer - only my opinion I've never been keen on bragging and think people who are constantly doing it are not very self-aware. Yes, celebrate successes but all means but not bloody constantly - it's boring and annoying....

YANBU it's extremely boring. And as children get older they hate it. It wasn't too bad when Facebook was just close friends and family but now you end up being friends with pretty much everyone you meet it's basically turned into bragbook. Report week is the worst. With the majority not realising that these days it would be pretty hard for a teacher to write a negative report and one of my daughter's was clearly copied and pasted as it had another child's name repeatedly

Just unfollow the braggers or deactivate Facebook. I do both frequently.

I am reminded of the famous quote "whenever a friend succeeds a little something in me dies"

I am realistic and I know the only people who are truly delighted if my children do amazingly well are me, their father and their grandparents.
We are a selfish species.

I don't go on about my DS and DSS because I think it's an invasion of their privacy and if they achieve something it's their achievement not mine. I will tell them it's proud of them and that means more to them than me telling a bunch of people they don't know.

I don't go on Fb much but when I do I notice it's always the same people posting about their wonderful lives, holidays or children all the time. I can't help wondering if their lives are so great why do the spend so much time on their phones rather than living it?

I agree with PP that it's often the most 'perfect' Facebook showcase that hides a multitude of happiness.

Not quite about children per se, but a good friend of mine refuses to put anything negative on FB. That's great you think, and it is all nice an cheery and smiley. She post endless happy pics of her and her daughter, her and her friends on numerous weekends away, always in the sun, always happy and laughing.
In reality, she's been having a terrible time for about 8 years. She divorced her DH after he went to prison. Nearly lost her life to sudden pneumonia, was in a coma for 2 weeks, has had endless failed, crap relationships.....now her ex dh is in prison for a second time and somehow she may loose her home because of it. Only me and few close friends know any of this.
However, endless mutual aquaintences moan at me that she's always on holiday or always partying.

Also, I know many completely seemingly loved-up couples who post sickly status's and selfies about how in love they are etc.....have car crash relationships and split up.

I try and tell myself that none of it is really real. However OP, I do get where you're coming from. I'm having a few career mopes at the moment and it cuts my mood when I scroll past colleagues on my news feed who endlessly announced all their successes, awards and achievements. I feel simple jealousy. Not that I'm inherently unhappy for them, but when I'm not feeling right and I see a quick one if these, it's just a little 'jab' in my my own head and the the little voice that tells me I'm not good enough.
All my problem I know, but it grates none the less.

Its all about the likes, and the ego brushing isen't it.

I am glad that NatalieO post, it brought the more sensible posters out of the woodwork, who probably were afraid to comment just in case they were seen as jealous or miserable.

No, not at all for me.

I was sharing something with the people who matter to me. They are spread to the 4 corners of the world, and even in the UK many are too far away (2hrs plus) for me to see them to tell them face to face.

Sorry that was in response to "it's all about the likes and the ego brushing"

I may be a horrible person but I don’t think there are 80+ people whose piano exams or egg and spoon races I care about. Close family only. Even my friends’ children I am glad they are happy and well but no, I don’t need to see them doing well in Maths or getting amazing reports.

The only people who should have to be bored with my DC’s successes are grandparents, aunts and uncles, godparents, and me and DP. Completely agree with cant here.

Ohdear, I am sure you will have people you are not close to on Facebook. There is an option to select people who yiu want to see yiur posts, before posting, those that will matter to you. Not some work colleague, or school friend you haven't seen in 20 years.

I don't have a work colleague from 20 years ago on my facebook or a friend who doesn't matter to me that I never see. The people I have are people who matter to me and who I matter to in return.

If you don't like what I post on facebook you can delete and block me.

I have 87 people on my facebook. 6 of those are my kids, then there's my family - by which I mean as far out as cousins. Then there's friends, and those are people who if they phoned today and said they were stuck I would go out of my way to help.

I do have some people I've not seen in a few years, but I am hardly going to go to Australia or America at the drop of a hat.

At the end of the day, I am not making anyone read it and if they can't be glad for the child who had tumours, who was mocked and bullied, that he has achieved a great thing, then I don't want them on my facebook and I heartily wish they would fuck off and delete block me.

I think it's a bit cringe, if I'm honest. I'll show DM, MIL and possibly Dsis my children's school reports and tell them how proud I am if they've done well, but I wouldn't stop all my friends in the street and say what my children got, which is what posting it on facebook is the equivalent of, imo. It's not really celebrating their achievements, or at least not in a way that's visible to my children as they aren't on facebook. On the other hand facebook is a stream of consciousness really - a lot of people just use it to splurge an inner monologue and really if I'm spending time reading it I only have myself to blame if I find it brash - I could always stop. And there are certainly worse things to post!

And you know what? Getting a degree is a big achievement. I've never posted about him before - I'm only on facebook this last 3 years and I don't generally post about my kids, other than to tag DD in love island crap.

Honestly after this thread I think I'll just delete it since it's upsetting so many people that I've done what I did it's not worth it.

one of my daughter's was clearly copied and pasted as it had another child's name repeatedly
Ha ha. That happened to us. Apparently Matthew was a joy to teach. Shame my dc is called Sarah.

I never post anything on FB about ds

I am just as pround as other parents most importantly HE knows that

What others think of that really has no impact on our lives

Ironic how so many posters are bragging here about how very modest they are on FB. Hilarious. Anonymity does not diminish the ego boost by much.

I think "so proud of ds getting his degree" is acceptable ohdear! Bit different to posting a whole school report or even key quotes.

@Ithinkthatsenough I knew a school mum like that too. She posted about how kind her son was but i happened to know he had been bullying two boys in his class. It made me wonder if he was a bully because his mum thought he could do no wrong so had never pulled him up on bullying behaviour.

I@ve never posted a school report for any of mine.