Horrid texts about me on MILs phone, should I say something

[Raspberryberetthekindyoufind]

DH, DS (five) are on holiday abroad with inlaws and I have no signal on my phone so I borrowed MILs phone to ring my mum as it’s her birthday today. As I was about to make the phone call a message from SIL (we hate each other) came through saying “I am glad the stupid bitch is not spoiling it this year for you all”
So wanting to know what this was about I did check MILs messages only to find many messages to SIL saying “thank gods the fits have “stayed away” this year” and “the lazy cow is pulling her weight this year” then messages back from SIL saying “it’s his fault he knew when he marriages her she had them” and “don’t know how he puts up with her”
Back story last year we went away and I had quite a few seizures (I am epileptic) and for two days I was completely floored and was told by DH to either sleep inside or just stay on the sunbed. I did have about five other seizures which knocked me out for a hour or so.
There is also a message on the phone to MILs best friend saying the same things she has messaged to SIL with best friend replying back “glad your holiday is not ruined this year”
I just feel like shit now and dont know what to do. If the message had not popped up from SIL I would never have checked MILs phone. I don’t know what to do I felt so guilty last year and MIL and FIL kept saying “it’s ok” and “don’t worry you cant help it”.
I now know MIL was prob slagging me off to all in sundry about her wrecked holiday. I know for a fact DH stayed with them the whole time last year with DS and left them in peace by the pool one of the days I was out of it and took DS to the beach
Feel like total shit I don’t know if I should say something now, tell DH, wait till we get home or just leave it

I would not do anything else now - you currently have the high ground in that she thinks you have only seen one message. And if you do anything else they will twist it round so that you are in the wrong.
But if I knew my MIL and SIL referred to me as a lazy cow/stupid bitch and implied my illness was ruining a holiday, I would just end all voluntary contact and let my DH deal with them. I'd turn up to mandatory family stuff (weddings, major birthdays etc) and keep out of the way, but that's it.
Life is just too short to put up with crap like this.
It's time to move on and spend you time and energy with people who actually like you.

*but not by your dh!

I think in your position I would tell your DH when you get home not while you are on holiday.

I'm scarlet for your MiL.
You are handling it well OP.

Don't let her ruin your holiday but by all means let her ruin hers!

I'd tell her that her headache is ruining the holiday!

Well done for rising above it. I would definitely tell your DH. You are a good person OP and you don't deserve this!

No good can ever come from putting these things in writing. There is a lesson in there somewhere.

What cunts your MIL and SIL are! Its not as if you can help when/where you have a seizure ffs

Beautifully handled, OP! Immensely dignified.

She will know you've seen it so I would be icy with her for the rest of the holiday. Tell DH what you saw so he can decide if he's done with them now as you should be. What a delightful pair they are.

Op has every right to tell her dh, why should she carry the burden herself for something that is not her fault. Good thing she saw what they really think of her. Everything happens for a reason.

I'd tell her that her headache is ruining the holiday!

Yes yes!!!!

I hope that your MIL is squirming with embarrassment! Have you told your DH yet?
Your MIL’s demeanour when she reappears from her room will be interesting.

Well I would be going very low/no contact with them after this.

When mil reappears say “oh I hope your headache isn’t ruining your holiday”

Personally I would confront MIL now. I would tell her that I'd read all the messages too. Let her dig herself out of that hole.

Did she know you used her phone?

Yes I couldn't resist it when mil surfaces please do enquire after her headache and slip in I DO hope it doesn't ruin your holiday.

Making light of a horrible situation op but you have handled it brilliantly.

Sorry @NotARegularPenguin super slow WiFi here.

*When mil reappears say “oh I hope your headache isn’t ruining your holiday”

Well handled! You do have to tell your dh - you should have his support, and a good dh deserves to know why you’re not keen on his mother anymore , plus he can’t possibly spend the weekend helping sil now ! And if he doesn’t know sounds like sil if not both of them could spin him some lies...

She'll be up there texting frantically bitching about you to SIL.

Well played OP. But please do tell your dh.

Excellent!

I think I will be in the minority here but I believe we are all entitled to our own private thoughts (we may share them with people we trust) you had no right to snoop in her private messages

No. Calling someone with a disability a lazy cow is prejudice. This kind of 'private thought' when expressed needs calling out for exactly what it is.

There are so many replies, I can't get through them all. OP, you must tell your hubby what has been said. I'm so sorry that what should be a relaxing time has been spoiled for you by nasty, thoughtless people. I'm so angry that people still treat others with illnesses and disabilities in such a cruel and disdainful manner and I know it must hurt. If I were you, I'd never want to set eyes on those 2 women ever again.

Last holiday you have with MIL and if she asks why next time you come to arrange it then you can tell her exactly why. However, be careful - people like your M and SIL are good at turning this back on other people.