School and DD's hair

[upsideup]

Uniform policy says long hair must be tied up out of the way and no extreme or fashion hairstyles. There are no examples or descriptions of what is considered an extreme/fashion hairstyle.

DD is year 6, has long, curly hair. For most of school so far it was just tied in a ponytail which by Y6 meant still had loose down to her bum, other girls complained that their hair down was still shorter than dd's up, teacher told us it was too long to just be put in a ponytail so we put it in 2 plaits, still went down to her bum but was secured tightly down her head and back out of the way. This was fine for 8+ months until another child purposely (but claimed accidentally) pulled her by her plaits on the playground and when the same child claimed she spun around a whipped him with her hair which apparently really hurt, teacher said they were still too long and getting in the way at school so we needed to change it. Other girls with longish hair(mid back) are still allowed their hair in plaits.

So for 3ish weeks we have been putting it in space buns (2 buns either side of her head), today we have been told that space buns are considered a fashion/extreme hairstyle and are not suitable for school. There really is too much hair to go into one bun and apart from cutting dd's hair which she is not prepared to do, we cant think of any other options. For secondary school her hair only needs to be up for sports and science and there are no rules on how its tied.

So AIBU to just keep sending her in with a a mixture of plaits and space buns for next few weeks with a note saying this is are only option until we get it cut but never actually get it cut? Or does anyone have any other suggestions?

The school is being ridiculous! Ask them exactly what hairstyles they’d suggest?!
And exactly how long is too long for hair, perhaps they could provide you with a precise measurement? And a styling workshop!

Most schools have much more important things to worry about than the length of their pupils hair!! Bonkers!

What kind of wussy teacher is allowing 11 year old girls to dictate the acceptable length of hair...coz that's what she is doing.

I would be very firm with her. Say DD is niot going to have her hair cut to satisfy jealous little girls and it is up to the teacher to manage their expectations take no fucking notice of any whinging.

Meant to say to the OP, I think the school's being ridiculous, since when have buns been viewed as extreme hairstyles??!

your not vain claire2313 your grown back hair is beautiful and more so as it shows the battle you've fought and won

As a teacher I can say that the school need to get a fucking grip. Our chn struggle to manage to have their hair tied up. I can just imagine the verbal I'd get if I told them how to. Ask them how her hair is affecting anyone's progress.

Two plaits down into a low bun, then she can do the French plaits along her scalp over night which then needs to be put into a bun in the morning?

A crown braid, you would need help with this one.

Two fish tail braids? I don't know if the way the braid is would make the hair shorter at the end at all

A French plant that wraps round the back of her head and comes at the front

A slightly more long term would be to put it all in little plaits which can then be tied into a pony tail or put into a bun. Would save time in mornings and evenings ( I did it when younger as had long hair although not as long as your DCs) and my mum would spend an hour putting my hair into plaits in front of the TV after it was freshly washed and still damp. Then it would stay like that for a few days

Failing that ask them what they would do with her hair - write to the head , maybe an email where you can attach photo evidence

Xox

Ffs if this was an employer telling a grown woman to cut their hair there would be murder;but because it's a school kid, just cut.

We had to tie hair back in science in the '80s - I still managed to burn my fringe looking into a test-tube too closely. It's a memorable smell.

My DD has bum length hair too. It always had to be tied back at primary but a pony tail was fine, we did plait it sometimes. Her teachers always commented on it, in a positive way, and when they went on trips away, must have spent hours doing complicated plaits (i’ve No idea how!) judging by the photos and DD’s descriptions. How ridiculously uptight the OP’s school is being, it’s just hair, not a weapon.

I realise it is not the point of this thread, but what is wrong with being vain, or looking like you are vain (if others choose this viewpoint)?

Milkmaid braids. And no way to cutting it. School have no jurisdiction to tell her to cut it.

Does the school seriously have nothing better to do then this? 🤨

"Dixiechickonhols

Plait and then Loop it up so no whipping around."

That's a good idea, I use to do mine like that.

Pleats at sides and bun or a French plait. I don't think space buns would be extreme hairstyle. However, it all seems a lot of hassle. Would you consider cutting her hair a bit? If it touches her bum that is extremely long.

Space buns are not a new hairstyle. This was worn in 1900-1930 ish. Folk just think the style was created for Star Wars films, which weren't yesterday either.

These rules really anger me. Schools shouldn't get to dictate hair length or style.

But in this instance you have done what they asked, tied it up. You've tried various methods of keeping it tied out of the way. If a child pulled her hair and got hit by her hair it's the childs fault.

I would send a letter stating how you have complied with their rules and ask what they expect your dd to do from this point forward making it clear cutting it is not an option at this time.

Other children's hair length has nothing to do with your child's. Worn up or down!

How about milkmaid braid? Fastened on the top of the head a la Heidi.

Or plaits, but loop them and fasten them at the top. Like this... does the pic work?

I have waist length hair. It's so much less of a faff than when I had it shorter. Plus my hairdresser bill is £0.
I have sometimes put it in a high ponytail and then put it in lots of tiny plaits before putting it in a bun. That did take ages though!
I hope your daughter hasn't been given a hard time today.

Not read the whole thread, as tea break isn't long enough, but my daughter (who has waist length hair) does 2 French plaits, then rolls them up into buns at the nape of her neck, or folds then and bands them. She's year 8 and thankfully does her own, but it only takes me 5 mins to do it for her if I need to. I also do a plait that goes round the crown - easier than it looks, and uses up all of her hair. She has quite a variety of styles - school not fussy as long as relatively neat, but she likes to get it up when the weather's hot or she's doing sport

I put my hair up today to keep it off my neck in the heat. I undid the elastic from yesterday's plait, combed in out, twisted it round and pinned it up with a sparkly claw grip. All of a minute to do. SUCH a long time and SO much fuss.

Then I contemplated my vanity in daring to have long hair.

Clairetree1 Honestly that sounds absolutely fine and completely different- you ask if they can keep braids tucked in in a situation where it's a bit unsafe otherwise.

You don't walk around heavily implying they should cut it off.

Absolutely none of the schools business if the hair is tied back out of the way as per the rules.

At the other end of the scale we had a ballet teacher who told my daughter off for having her hair cut in an inverse bob because it meant she couldn't do a ballet bun. I pointed out the boys in the class didn't wear a bun and she had no right to dictate my daughter's hair style. She was a 10 year old doing an hour of ballet a week not a professional prima ballerina!

So what did you do in the end, @upsideup? Have the school let it go?