About Nanny spending money?

[Bubbinsmakesthree]

We employ a nanny to look after 2 DC. She's really great but it's a massive expense for us (we pay her more than I earn). We are cutting back massively to afford it and going without day to day treats (always take a packed lunch to work, never buy takeaway coffee etc). I leave the nanny a kitty to spend as she sees fit but she's easily spending £20 a week on meals out etc - they'll have lunch in a cafe when they could easily have had a picnic, or stop in Starbucks whilst the younger one is napping in the buggy. It grates a bit for her to be indulging in what I'm sacrificing.

Am I being petty or a soft touch?

I think it’s probably a bit too late to set the law down now. Maybe replace the nanny with a cheaper one and then give them a strict budget

Why do you employ a nanny if you earn less than whatever you pay her?

Well did you say that you'd prefer her to take lunches rather than buy them out? She might not know it's a problem! I do plenty of pack lunches and picnics but stopping for the odd cafe or Starbucks drink is pretty standard unless I've been told otherwise. We spend a lot of time out and about.

Ive always been very clear with our nannies when employing them about the kind of activities we can afford as we don’t have lots of disposable income at the moment.
Eg playgroups, swimming, parks etc rather than lunches out and play farms regularly. She’s been very good and budgets well and uses my car so doesnt spend extra cash on mileage.
Just speak to her about food and ensure there’s sufficient for packed lunches or ask her to let you know what else she may need to cook meals at home.
Our nanny leaves me a note if she needs ingredients I may not have and freezes leftovers.
Just have an honest talk, don’t quiet seethe.

You need to use words to verbalise it.

explain to the nanny you have a tight budget. There is a £20 (or whatever) in the kitty and once it’s gone it’s gone.

I'm a nanny and I agree with you. Visits to cafes and meals out should be occasional treats, that I try to leave for parents! I try to limit what I spend on outings etc as it does add up, especially over the school holidays but if you look around there is quite a bit of cheap or free stuff to do. We always take a picnic and drinks and snacks, but I do buy an ice cream or hot chocolate as a special treat maybe once every few weeks.

Maybe replace the nanny with a cheaper one

Ah yes because it's that easy. It's not like switching to a different brand of washing powder is it?

Why do you employ a nanny if you earn less than whatever you pay her?

Because 2 DC in full time childcare will cost a fortune whatever we do, she is brilliant, and I value my career.

Er you just go back to the agency you hired this nanny from and get a new one? Hiring a nanny isn’t rocket science.

Jesus Duchy. I do t even know where to start to be honest, you sound so ignorant on the subject, but I'll just point out that a) not all nannies come from agencies, and b) they're not a disposable commodity.

Everyone else - thank you for the helpful replies. First time we've employed a nanny so just trying to get a feel for what is normal.

Hahahahahaha at the people who think it's easy to jist replace a nanny with another one. Yes, because that's less hassle than speaking to the existing nanny about what to spend £20 on.

It is if you value their bond with your children.

I would just talk to her tbh. Say unless totally necessary you'd rather they took pack ups etc.

Tbh should she be buying herself coffees etc on your money?

I would tell her due to hmrc rules you're not allowed to leave a kitty and if she has any out of pocket expenses to produce a receipt and you'll reimburse reasonable expenses eg transport, toddler groups etc

Don't replace your nanny over this. Tell her there is a small budget for stuff like that, and you expect her to take sandwiches etc. To be honest, with £20 a week for her and two kids, she can't be having many 'meals out'.

Er you just go back to the agency you hired this nanny from and get a new one? Hiring a nanny isn’t rocket science.

Do you have children?

You don't pick up a nanny like you pick up a packet of tampax.

That's rubbish kaytee, nannies aren't stupid. And there's no way she should be out of pocket. All it takes is a simple chat on what the money should be spent on 🙄

Is that true kaytee or are you making that up?

Of course it isn't true.

"Sorry DC you are not going to see your adored nanny again because she spent too much on frappachinos, it's OK there's a new rentananny from the agency coming today". Yes this is a great idea

You leave her a kitty though so just reduce the amount??

Talk to her, agree a weekly budget and only leave that. You can always reevaluate if need be

I’m a nanny and it’s so important to make clear what you expect to be spent and what on.ove worked in jobs with A very limited budget and jobs with endless supplies of money 🤷🏻‍♀️

If we have no choice but to go out for lunch (and a packed lunch won’t work) then I buy myself lunch with the money but always something cheap or I find a voucher code.

If I choose to take them out for dinner (eg last week the cleaner came in the afternoon and instead of having to reclean a kitchen that had just been Cleaned, I took them out) then I pay for us all

I never buy my coffee out of the kitty. If I’m buying the kids an ice cream then occasionally I’ll buy myself one but not often

Making it up pretty much although I'm sure there will be something to do with expenses rules that you could research and use to your advantage.
In my previous work places we always had to claim back expenses, were never given cash floats so there may be a reason.

I do not think circa £20 pw is unreasonable tbh. You do need to make sure you have the ingredients in for lunches, snacks, drinks to take. Ours used to take the little ones on trains and buses, those fares cost a bit. It was their school holidays so I felt they were entitled to treats because I would have taken them if I had been there.

We ask our nanny to write all expenditure down in a notebook just so we can keep track of it, that might help her keep an eye on it too.

I agree with other posters that you just need to have a word with her. We give our nanny a daily budget of £20 including mileage so we’re all clear on where we stand. You don’t have to do it as a ‘you’re spending too much’ conversation, more a ‘we’ve been looking at the family budget and have set a daily budget of £X for you as part of that’. I’ve had to have a word like this a few times when the spending has crept up and it’s always fine.

I think you should just explain that you cannot afford the meals out and ask her to make packed lunches and take drinks from now on. Ask her to limit the spends to an ice cream or something. I also don’t see anything wrong in planning activities she will be doing with your children and deciding budgets with her and some trips out will cost £20 even with a packed lunch. She probably has no idea of your situation right now and you will feel tons better once you’ve told her. It’s not as though your expecting her to take a pay cut.