To steer DH away from this woman?

[Incywincyquincy]

So dh became facebook friends with a woman from school whose child is in dd's class. All innocent - I know her too and chat regularly. However, he seems to have a bit of a crush on her and I think she's noticed. It is noticeable that every picture she posts and every question she asks, he responds to instantly. Some might say he is being helpful, but she has started to notice and has mentioned in a jokey way that she feels a bit awkward about it.

How do I gently steer him away from doing this without embarrassing him or telling him what she has said?

Are you man in question?

That thought crossed my mind too Clubcuts!

Ask her to delete him as a friend and then tell him why yourself.

I'd start the conversation with, "I'm telling you this because I love you..." and end it with, "you Bell end"!

If you really don't feel like you can tell him that it bothers her, (for whatever reason) then can you say that her husband/partner noticed and is pissed?

@Storm4star great minds think alike! 😆

If you really don't feel like you can tell him that it bothers her, (for whatever reason) then can you say that her husband/partner noticed and is pissed?

Further fuelling the misogynistic dicks belief that women are just there to be leached over and silly girlie can't think for herself! She is after all just her mans possession and if he's unhappy then I'll stop!

He has every right to be mortified. Don't pussy foot around, tell him to stop it as he is embarrassing not only the woman but also you and is making himself look a tit.

No you don’t need to do anything. He is the pest he needs to stop and be responsible

Have you no pride?! I would be LIVID if my husband made me - and himself - look a fool like this!

Time to get angry 😡

It is not the op responsibility to sanction him gently,mindful of his feelings
Quite simply tell him he makes the other parent feel uncomfortable

Surely the obvious answer is for her to unfollow him? He won't even know.

Or maybe that's too easy and would avoid the drama everyone seems to love.

I don't understand why you need to come up with a story. If it caused a massive row when you tried to joke him out of it, then the way to avoid a repeat is to tell him, unemotionally and factually, what the woman said to you. He can't blame you for what she said, or that you are exaggerating if it's a straightforward factual report of what she said. I guess you could soften it a bit by saying that she may have got the wrong end of the stick, but obviously the way to avoid further misunderstandings is just to ignore her in future.

Are you scared of your husband, OP?

Love the victim blaming. And the expert input 😂

OP - are you frightened of your dp?

If you aren't and there isn't a chance of him being abusive - bloody tell him straight to pack his behaviour in!! Who cares if he feels mortified - he's embarrassing himself and you with how he's behaving.

people ignore things for so long.so for her to be passed that and at the level of it becoming too uncomfortable she has to speak out.its gone too far and need stopping now.

I'm an expert in human behaviour and rarely wrong

Only someone with zero expertise in human behaviour could post that.

Don't diss the expert Bibesia.

Heaven save us from "experts"

I would just say, 'btw, Susan mentioned you're creeping her out on FB' casually while you're making a brew. No fuss & if he's embarrassed, he doesn't need to get defensive & arsey if he doesn't feel you're attacking him. Good luck, sounds like he may be a bit high maintenance, reading between the lines...

Well.

There may be a chance that she also received weird private messages from him, but does not want to say it straight.

Every "follower" on social networks like that (liking every photo, commenting under every post) I've ever had also sent some mildly flirtatious private messages as well. Some of them were married to women I know socially.

I'd just say "Well that was embarrassing. X has just had a chat with me and told me she's feeling awkward and embarrassed by you Facebook stalking her. I told you you were being a prat".

Are we sure the friend is actually uncomfortable and approached op? I've re-read the op and i can imagine it going down like:
friend looks at phone 'oh wow, John's answered first crack out of the bag again! Haha it's like he's stalking me - that'll look a bit suspicious to all the gossips at school - bit awkward, haha!'

I mean, clearly the op is bothered by it but not clear that the friend is.

I think you need to think very hard why you don't want to confront this with him OP. He is humiliating you and harassing another woman. Why will you not stop him? If it's because you are scared he will leave the relationship is not worth being in, if it is because you are scared of his reaction you need to leave. Now.

OP said her fiend said "she feels a bit awkward about it." Thats all that matters, not whether its a huge deal to anyone else, nor ops dh but the fact that her friend feels awkward. She obviously doesnt want to upset OP or spoil their friendship by saying "Tell your dh to stop stalking me on fb and replying within seconds to everthing I post, its pissing me off and its creepy" does she?