Ungrateful kid-gutted

[Miladamermalada]

Todays my sons birthday hes 14
Am single mum he had a party got loads of presents.
Wanted an xbox earphones and games. I skint myself to get thes and i mean skint. Ive no food bin bags nothing.
Hes just opened the xbox before anything else and thrown the wrapper on the floor in a strop and refused to speak. Apparently its the wrong one.
I usually take photos as they open presents but im so disgusted Ive come to bed crying.
I must have spent 500 quid.
Never again.
Ive raised entitled little bastards. His brother-also barged in my bedroom demanding to know where his tie was at 06 00. I have chronic illness and said he cant come in but he can knock after 7.
Aibu to ask where i have gone wrong.

Take it back to the shop and don’t spend 500 quid on him. Buy him a book and then go food shopping. Honestly

I didn't know there were different types of x boxes

How many teenagers have a paper round to buy an Xbox?

I work with teenagers and it is the norm for them to have this stuff and it is important to them.

I agree the prices for technology are extortionate and in some families something has to give but in this case op has saved up so obviously thinks it’s worth it. Just change it for the one he wants.

I'm sorry you're having a she day.

That's meant to say shit day 🙄

Why do you think you chose to go without food in order to buy him this op? That in itself is a problem. Just because it sounds a bit like you're prioritising his needs over everything else. It is lovely to want to buy him a gift he really wants for his birthday, but is this your own attitude that his desires are a priority over everything else that he is showing you now?

20 quid max for birthdays, the kids know we can't spend loads on presents, Christmas they get more but I doubt we spend 500 on presents in total including family and friends.

Sadly for you this post just proves the more you give the more people expect and the more ungrateful they are.
Let him see you cry, how much he has hurt you and make sure he knows what you sacrificed for him and don't put yourself in this position again.

Sorry but £500 you can’t afford on a birthday. That’s just wrong.

I’d take it back. Maybe he could get a Saturday job and learn how hard it is to earn £500 pounds.

We only spend around £30-40 on our kids birthday present. And we have a reasonable income. My two DDs have an Xbox but they bought it themselves out of money they earnt and it was second hand.

Similar if they want branded clothes or iPhones they have to buy themselves. Surprising how much better looked after stuff is if they have to wash a shit load of pots to purchase. For reference they are 17 & 16 and both work in a loca cafe since 13

£500?
Why? When this left you short?
I bought ds's an almost new/used for only a week - x box off local Facebook for £200. Headsets so they can play fort nite etc with their friends don't cost that much.

Take it back! It’s ludicrous that you spend so much!!

Hi it wasnt the wrong game it was that it came with the wrong game. Id wrapped the desired game separately but he didnt wait to see that just went mardy.
I need to nip it in the bud youre right.
Yes i didnt speak with respect in my post but right now i dont respect him AT ALL.
And no he isnt the autistic one.
I did post a thread about them having a bedroom each and should i swap as i share with my 2 daughters.
This has confirmed that they will be sharing again by this time next week. Im done.

£500 and now you have no food? This can’t be for real and if it is, I’m afraid I think you’ve made an extremely poor judgement. An x box won’t keep your dc fed.

I have tremendous sympathy for you. I think as parents, and particuarly single parents, we sometimes think its our duty to give them everything that their hearts desire - especially at Christmas and birthdays.
As PPs have said, it was a fooish thing to do, but I have done it (more than once)
I think that we have to stop trying to fulfil their every demand and start explaining the facts of life to them. If he wants more than you can give him, he needs to get a paper round or something and earn the money and get it himself. If he had saved that money he wouldn't have been throwing it on the floor in a strop.
After my divorce, I somehow felt that I had to 'make it up' to my kids. I went completely nuts at Christmas and on their birthdays so that they wouldn't notice that their dad barely bothers. I have to say that they haven't really appreciated it and their expectations became ludicrous. I have stopped it now and started to spend the money on myself.
And no one died.

And i get paid saturday. So will have foid etc then.
He didnt have to pretend to like it but thats manners. As a kid id have plastered a smile on and said thank you.
Yesterday he was moaning that his tv wasnt big enough for it and he wanted a new one.
No fucking way

Awful for you, Mame. Hope the day gets better.

500 was with the party etc everything.

Return the games console.

Tell your son from now on birthday gifts will be minimal.

500 quid is a lot to spend when you're skint.

Agree with the others. Take it back. He doesn't deserve it.

Definitely lock the xbox away for a few days. I get that what everyone else is saying is the sensible option but you have really gone out of your way to get it for him and clearly wanted him to have it and selling it is the bit he will remember in the long run not his behaviour or the reasons behind it.

My main worry here is if you have become skint to spend £500 on one child and you have 4 will they all get the same spend for their birthdays?

You do need to lower their expectations and prioritise household essentials a little more.

Take it back and get a full refund. Don't replace it.

Get your priorities in order and learn to say no to him. Leaving a family without food to appease the biggest, shoutiest member is not on.

Sorry, Milada even!

500 even for party and everything is far too much. Ours mostly past parties but even in their prime we only spent more than £100 once and that was split between two families as birthdays only a day a part and did a joint laserquest party.

Maybe next year when DD1 is 18 we might spend more but I doubt it.

Are you going to return the console or enable his behaviour? He doesn’t give a fuck if you’re crying in bed.

Op what did you feed your four children and how did you dispose of your waste without bin liners?
This gift was irresponsible regardless of his response.

I'd take the console back and get a refund but tell your son you'll pay for half a new console when he has earned enough to pay for the other half.