To say I’m not using Nap Time to do housework?

[QueenofmyPrinces]

I have a 4 year old and a 10 month old and currently on Maternity Leave.

For three days a week my 4 year old is in childcare all day so I only have both children at home two days a week. On those two days trying to do any form of housework beyond washing up and sorting out laundry is near impossible.

My 10 month old is good with his naps, sleeping an hour in the morning and then 1.5 hours in the afternoon.

During this time I probably should do some of the housework that can’t be done when he’s awake like cleaning the kitchen floors, cleaning the bathrooms, cleaning windows, polishing etc etc but I have no inclination to do so.

I’m usually knackered from a bad night with the baby and I see Nap Time as my only down time. I also use it to pursue my own interest which is writing.

There are lots of things that need doing around the house that I could do whilst my 10 month sleeps but then when would I have me time?

I’m actually considering getting a cleaner even on Maternity Leave which must be lazy of me? I don’t know?

How does everyone else balance doing housework and having down time?

Eden - he’s a teacher.

He even takes our 4 year old abroad twice a year just the two of them. He said he can’t wait until the 10 month is older so he can take both boys.

I told him that neither could I

My youngest is nearly 2.5 and I still use naptime to chill out, or nap. Obviously any urgent and non-child compatible jobs get done then too - not cleaning, but stuff like sorting car insurance. It's my only child-free time (apart from the evening). It only happens a couple of times a week now so I'm enjoying it while it lasts. TBH even once the older ones dropped their naps, I enforced an hour or so of "quiet time" (ie: TV or independent play) so I could do what needs doing and then Mumsnet.

I'd never nap when they're awake in the house but I think it's good for them all to see me chill out with a book or chat to my mates on the phone. I'm a person too.

also get ur little one to do little chores for mummy.start them early on seeing it as a good thing.nice thing helpful things not a chore forced on them later.
just simple things like "ooh can you take that over there for me.
or this is what we use to wipe away all those mucky bits.
will you spray here whilst I wipe.
play in the washing up foam etc etc
it can really help

My 4 year old love helping me load the washing machine and putting the powder and conditioner in, bless him. He also likes helping to sweep the kitchen floor. In fact, that last time I cleaned the bathroom he was there helping me wearing his rubber gloves

I haven’t RTFT but have you tried The Organised Mum method. You clean 45 mins a day no more, and it focuses on one room per day. It’s really good. My eldest is currently off school so have 4 children 5 and under home and my house is spotless because of this method.

sounds fantastic and what a lovely little boy.

I don’t clean at nap time. I slept or netflixed at nap time (although with one I had to be walking around in the fresh air with the pram to get nap time)

However my house was cleaner then ever because we were in it so much. I just put baby in the sling/ bouncer/ play mat/ coy whatever and leave the older one watching films/ playing if they’re around and get on with it. It never seemed a big deal, doesn’t take long. We usually have a cleaner but wanted to save the cash during mat leave.

The problem I gave is that the youngest started walking when he was 9 months old so now he wants to be on the go all the time. I spend my day chasing after him, literally

There’s nowhere I could leave him so I could get some cleaning done because unless he’s walking he’s screaming

Mine did too but I just ignored them 😭 I found it more stressful to be at their beck and call every second then to listen to them screaming for 10 mins whilst I unloaded the dishwasher.

God I would love a dishwasher - maybe money would be better spent on one of those instead of a cleaner

@QueenofmyPrinces

Lazy or not lazy? Who cares! :) if you can afford a cleaner get a cleaner and enjoy the rest! :)

Jesus don't beat yourself up. Nap times ARE your down times. Does your husband spend his breaks at work trying to 'get stuff done'? I don't think so.

Where is this anxiety coming from ? Are you just putting pressure on yourself or is your partner hassling you?

Those are your relaxation times so don't feel guilty about relaxing. And if you can afford a cleaner, DO IT. It's not lazy, it's the best money you'll ever spend.

I got hugely addicted to Criminal Minds during my DDs naptime when I was on maternity. Best 7 months ever. :)

I could have written your post. I have a 4yo and a 11mo who doesn't sleep. I am back at work now but before I went back I used nap time for me unashamedly. Reading, sitting in the (rare) sun, having an bath, watching tv - whatever helped me feel human.
I didn't completely neglect the house as I always did little chunks throughout the night and day in terms of laundry, tidying, washing up, keeping kitchen and bathroom clean. Literally in 5-10 min chunks so I'd wipe down bathroom while cleaning teeth, do washing up while waiting for kettle to boil etc. I left hoovering to the husband and had a cleaner do a once round weekly. Only thing I was good at was cooking evening meal from scratch every day. Do whatever makes you feel good and happy and don't feel guilty for that

I had a cleaner during my maternity leave. If you can afford it, then go for it. Don't sweat the small stuff and use your time for rest or to do other things (writing)!

If you love writing and are good at it then you should be being paid for it. May as well use that 1.5 hour productively instead of wasting it.

YA Definitely NBU!!

Sometimes I use baby's naps to crack on with something if I'm feeling energetic or productive and sometimes I'll just sit and go online, Facebook etc. Depends how tired I am.

You just have to do what you feel like. I wouldn't judge you for it. And yes to the cleaner. I would get one if we could afford it and my house had no clutter.

Was also supposed to say that I sometimes do housework if baby is happy in her little seat watching me. Also, what writing do you do? I'd love to do something creative in my own time.

I write novels. I’ve wrote two so far but just for my own pleasure.

Month or so ago though my husband paid for me to enrol on an online novel writing course (it was a surprise for me) so I’m working through that whilst writing my third novel alongside it with the intention of sending this one off to publishers.

The course is amazing but involves working through modules and taking examinations so I can only do it when the children aren’t around. Hence why I do it during nap time as usually by the end of the day when they’re in bed my brain is too frazzled to concentrate on it.

I used to write during nap times and later introduced ‘quiet time’ when they stopped having naps so I could still have an hour to write. Have completed whole novels though and writing was an essential part of my life. Cleaning always needs doing.

I think there has to be a balance. Recently I’ve been working during nap times on my non-working days and it’s made me miserable and the house a tip. I finally made the decision to stop doing it and it felt like I had time to relax and do a few jobs which made a massive difference. I do need a cleaner though.

If you're resting with your feet up, even if you're not sleeping, it's still a rest. Do it!

Totally reasonable!
Why my LO was that age I used to use the morning nap to do useful stuff, like putting a wash on and tidying up etc. Then the afternoon nap was MINE. I used to do some colouring, or play a game on the computer. Or when I got pregnant again, I slept the whole time he slept!
And I got a cleaner. I bloody hate cleaning and we could afford it. Now we really can't afford it, but it's the last luxury I'd consider dropping - the telly would go first!!!

I couldn't agree more!!!! Never ever ask mumsnet. Do what you want.

Nap time = me time. Use it to do whatever you want.