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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

my sil is awful

233 replies

RioTheParrott · 17/06/2018 23:29

God give me strength. I'm due to get married next month and although I don't get on with sil have asked her to be bridesmaid to include her. We had a dress fitting yesterday and she went on and on about how huge I'll be on the day (I'll be 21 weeks pregnant). I laughed it off but I wanted to tell her where to go.

We went for lunch afterwards and obviously I wasn't drinking but she got wasted. I had to get her into a taxi and back to her parents. She sat on the couch and told me I'm a tart and she's disappointed her brother is marrying me. I couldn't be arsed with her so I've told her to grow up and left. I haven't told my fiancé yet as he's away with work.

OP posts:
ThistleAmore · 18/06/2018 21:16

So she's been flooding you with text messages telling you what a terrible person you are (at 21 weeks pregnant, no less) and your fiance is 'sitting on his hands'?

Fuck that. If anybody, family member or no, was harassing my OH, I'd be doing something about it.

You don't have a SIL problem so much as a DH problem, here.

SalemBlackCat · 18/06/2018 21:17

Wow. At least your DF has actual evidence in the form of those texts. I'd suggest your DF text her back something.

ohfourfoxache · 18/06/2018 21:20

Holy fuck what a bitch

Now is probably the time to rescind the invite

SalemBlackCat · 18/06/2018 21:21

ThistleAmore She isn't 21 weeks now, she will be 21 weeks in 6 weeks time at the wedding. And he already phoned his sister and chewed her out. She hung up on him.

LineRunners · 18/06/2018 21:21

Angry texting solves nothing, though.

Original poster
RioTheParrott · 18/06/2018 21:24

I didn't meet my fiancé when my son was 3 weeks old. I've known him for years through my family and got together when my son was 6 months. I'll be 21 weeks pregnant on the wedding day.

OP posts:
MadMags · 18/06/2018 21:26

Sorry, I don’t know why I thought I read three weeks!

But still, my point remains. She seems to be focusing on that and I have to wonder why she has such a problem with him taking on that role with your son!

Original poster
RioTheParrott · 18/06/2018 21:28

It's none of her business what her 30 year old brother does though. It's up to us how we decide to raise him and our new baby

OP posts:
Ginosaji · 18/06/2018 21:29

So he told her she was welcome at the wedding, but that if she caused trouble that would be it? Well judging by the angry texts and the content of them id say she has caused trouble, if this was my sil/dsis she would most definitely be uninvited now!

Even if she did come to the wedding and managed to keep her gob shut (unlikely) she would jut sit there and glare the while time and cause an atmosphere and make you feel uncomfortable, uninvite her asap, you will enjoy your wedding much more without her!

treesforesthappy · 18/06/2018 21:41

is it only me that thinks a woman so obviously demented and nasty will get eye-rolls when she says this stuff about the op?

In reality, I'd probably do what all the others have suggested about banning her or at least bin her as bridesmaid as she doesn't wish you well, but, she is so obviously potty and mean spirited op, she's her own reward with a personality like that. And nasty narcs like that love the drama of pushing people into a response so they can play the victim.

PoodlesOfFund · 18/06/2018 21:42

It's up to us how we decide to raise him and our new baby

That's the point MadMags is making, that's why it's so weird that she's so overly invested.

Weezol · 18/06/2018 21:45

Pass my compliments to DF for not buying into her drama - his hands must be going numb! Give it 24 hrs and then decide whether or not to fully exclude her.

Just on the texts tonight I would want to ban her and I'd go NC with her. I wouldn't expect DF to go NC unless he wants to, but I'd hope he would respect my choice and see her away from you and your children.

WhiteWalkerWife · 18/06/2018 21:54

What a lovely person, not. I suggest your fiance call his parents to update them before she ropes them in.

Thehop · 18/06/2018 22:02

I’m glad your dd has backed you up. What a bitch. Try to enjoy your wedding xx

TheBigFatMermaid · 18/06/2018 22:37

Well, it seems you have a good one there, his family-not so much!

GreenTulips · 18/06/2018 22:41

DOnt block her - keep the messages

Screen shot themfor future reference

Yes to DP sitting in his hands - best wait til things are calm and not aodnon anger - that way she knows he means it

C2205 · 18/06/2018 22:52

High praise for your fiance..... Just make sure he sees every text she sends and when she send it too! Maybe she is actually stupid enough to think you wouldn't show him... Trekking him it's all a mistake then texting more insults to you?
Once he and you are calm, let him ring or text her from your phone so it's another show to her of a united front.
Has he spoken with his parents about it?
Maybe if he asks them to get their 26yr old brat in line or she's banned from the wedding and your lives for good it may help? At least to relieve all this stress before your wedding and for your pregnancy.
Above all else, you and DF stay strong together. End of the day you're marrying because you love each other and are a family unit.... Something I think your SIL to be send extremely jealous of (not to mention unhinged!)
X

C2205 · 18/06/2018 22:52

seems extremely jealous of

fontofnoknowledge · 19/06/2018 05:55

How long have you and DP been together OP ? (How long has she been like this ? )

kaytee87 · 19/06/2018 06:21

I vaguely remember your last thread about her.
I'd let your fiancé deal with her, but make sure he does it properly.

Snappedandfarted2018 · 19/06/2018 08:01

Oh now I think I know who this is! You introduced your dp very quickly and was immediately calling him dad after a short time. A lot of people agreed with her that it was far too soon and confusing.

BigfluffybearBum · 19/06/2018 09:17

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

BigfluffybearBum · 19/06/2018 09:18

oops wrong post

crispysausagerolls · 19/06/2018 09:20

After her latest I would be disinviting her. Why would you want someone at your wedding who thinks that way about you? And why would she want to attend?!

Twinkletoes90 · 19/06/2018 09:21

Oh OP - she does sound like a complete dick! - even if he was introduced quickly or anything what the hell has it to do with her? YOUR child not hers!!!! she sounds jealous as ur having a baby and lights on you and not her...
does she have her own children? is she getting married??

has snapped got the right person?