to use the gents' toilets?

[Hadalifeonce]

On arriving at Gatwick after our holiday, I was desperate for the loo; the queue for the ladies was almost to the baggage reclaim belt, being of a 'certain age' I was busting.
I told DH of my problem, he said he would go into the gents to see if there was a free cubicle, he called me in, I dashed into the 1st cubicle (one of many free) had my wee and dashed out again. I was getting my cleansing gel out of my handbag when a man, who had obviously been in the toilets at the time, made a pointed comment about some women not being prepared to wait their turn and to feeling free to go into the gents.
I turned round and stated that as a middle aged woman with no pelvic floor, I couldn't wait. This seemed to take the wind from his sails.
But was I being unreasonable to use the gents?

Total eye roll, let's hope those who are saying yabu don't have to rely on the kindness of others sometimes. Mumsnet is funny at times. We know it's the men's toilet, it's a one off emergency. Don't think op goes round using the men's fgs!

Total eye roll, let's hope those who are saying yabu don't have to rely on the kindness of others sometimes. Mumsnet is funny at times. We know it's the men's toilet, it's a one off emergency. Don't think op goes round using the men's fgs

You’re missing the point. She didn’t rely on the kindness of others, she presumed it was ok. As I said quickly sorted by “really sorry, absolute emergency do you mind if I pop in”.

But the chap who objected wasn’t being unreasonable in any way.

What if he had objected, would it be ok for somebody to soil themselves! It is, relying on people being kind. Really this is a non issue, don't know why op posted it.

What if he had objected, would it be ok for somebody to soil themselves! It is, relying on people being kind. Really this is a non issue, don't know why op posted it

Then she would have had to wait. Just like if all cubicles were in use.

You know the sign that says "men's" is merely a sign and not a police officer, right? If this were the same situation but with a disabled toilet or children's only toilet, no one would say it were unreasonable but this has become about men's rights for some reason like everything else in life

but this has become about men's rights for some reason like everything else in life

if the OP were a man I would have said exactly the same - unreasonable to use the ladies without exercising the courtesy to ask, why not use the accessible/baby room which are close by

YWBU

MrsRed I don't think you get it, some people cannot wait! I am sure being a teacher, if you had a sudden attack of IBS or runs, you would not stand in front of the class and shart yourself.

I don't think you get it, some people cannot wait!

Of course. But we don’t actually know whether the OP truly couldn’t wait, or rather couldn’t be bothered to queue and indeed neither does the chap who objected.

If a genuine need I think the OP getting a “can’t wait” card for future instances would be a good idea and probably mean the situation doesn’t arise again.

So you would poo yourself in front of a class then?

From what op has said, she coulden't or she would have waited or found an accessible toilet.

Yes she needed a wee Mrsred, but one that she was not able to wait for. Hadli the moral of the story is, if you are going on a plane wear a Tena just in case, you might need to use the toilet quickly.

I've been bursting and can't wait, thankfully I just about made it home. It was her call to decide whether she could wait or not, and she found that she could not, so used a toilet.

MrsRed totally irrelevant, she is not a teacher, and she did not just need a wee, it sounds as though she was going to wet herself soon if she did not get to the toilet, hence using the men's. I recall her saying in another post, that her pelvic floor was weak, so she could not hold it in for long.

I am sure MrsRed that if you had a medical condition that meant you were partially incontinant and had to use the toilet quickly, the school would devise a system so that you did not get to the position of soiling yourself.

I am not talking about op here, if you had medical conditions like IBS, bowel or bladder conditions the school would have to accommodate your disability.

I turned round and stated that as a middle aged woman with no pelvic floor, I couldn't wait. This seemed to take the wind from his sails.

Well said! Needs must.
Your husband acted effectively to support you in an emergency situation.
Not ideal, but not the end of the world for the man coming out, either.