AIBU to be really irritated by women who give up good careers to sell tat on the internet?

[itsgoodtobehome]

Right, I know this one might be a bit controversial, but I am generally interested to see if other people are also irritated by this.

So, I have several friends/acquaintances who have had good careers (teachers, lawyers, accountants, music execs, investment bankers) who have had children and given up work. This is not by AIBU, as that's entirely up to them, and lucky them if that's what they choose to do.

They have then gone on to set up their own home-made businesses, mostly selling via the internet. Again, not my AIBU, as being entrepreneurial is great, and good that they are not solely relying on their partners for income.

However, (and here is the AIBU), what they are making and selling, seems to me like utter crap. Here are some examples:

1. One is making homemade lampshades and matching wallpaper for children's bedrooms. Nice idea in theory, but I saw one 'rugby/football' design which basically looked like some kid had stuck all of their panini football stickers on their bedroom wall!

1. Another is making stuffed toys, bags, bunting etc out of children's old clothes and blankets. Again, a nice idea (and the stuffed toys made out of old baby-grows are quite cute!!). However, she has recently been touting these PE/Sports/Beach bags, which quite frankly, look like the sort of drawstring bag I remember making in sewing lessons in primary school!

1. A third has started making this pearl jewelry. Unfortunately, the pearls look as though they came out of a Christmas cracker, and then they are (very badly) glued onto the back of an earring stud, or onto some manky bit of leather strap like the sort of thing A-Ha used to wear on their wrists in the '80s!!

1. Finally, another one is selling very expensive designer children's clothes that she buys at a ridiculous amount, and then charges an even more ridiculous amount on her website.

I'm probably sounding very mean spirited, but it just annoys me that these highly capable women are selling such tat on the internet (and it's not cheap either) to try and replace their previous careers, when they have so much talent, experience in other areas.

AIBU, or do others get this too?

If it's buy a piece of tatty furniture, spray it with crackle glaze and claim it's upcycled, then it's ridiculous
You obviously haven’t seen how much money Sarah Moore makes for doing not much more than that
I’m sure Orla Kiely, Cath Kidston and Emma Bridgewater did some crap stuff before they actually hit the pay load. Maybe Jo Malone’s first ever fragrance smelt like poo, who knows? Anyway, what difference does it make to you, surely if it’s rubbish no one will buy it, and if it isn’t they will. Can’t see why you’re so bothered.

I do see your point op. Women who used to be an accountant who now spend time making crap. It does seem a waste of potential and infantilising.

You sound jealous, bitter, unhappy, and angry.

Maybe you should think about making your own life better, if you're that unhappy, instead of pissing all over everyone else's bonfire.

LOL at you peeing your pants with excitement at one poster agreeing with you. 'See MAISY agrees!!!' Yeah but no-one else does.

What does that tell you?

@StealthPolarBear

I do see your point op. Women who used to be an accountant who now spend time making crap. It does seem a waste of potential and infantilising.

WTAF?

Infantalising?!

What a spiteful and bitchy thing to say.

lindalee3
I'm more stunned that round here 'be good or at least vaguely competent in something before trying to do a business' is a controversial view.

Want to be a photographer? Great, make sure you can take great photos (don't charge people for events when you can only point, shoot and hope for the best. Make sure you know a bit about what makes a good photo)

Want to turn your card making and scrapbooking into a business doing personalised items? Great. Make sure your craftsmanship is good and you have a good eye for detail.

Want to refurb furniture? Make sure you know the tiniest bit about furniture and can reupholster to a reasonable standard.

I'm not saying people shouldn't learn new skills, just that learning new skills abd it being a viable product and business are 2 different things.

If my DH came home tonight and said 'Maisy, I'm going to make personalised mosaic art to bring in some spendies for holiday', the first thing I'd ask him is can he even do mosaic? Now if he wants to learn mosaic and try a new skill, great. He can get himself to classes and learn a new skill. Maybe in time he'll be quite talented at it. But what I wouldn't do is say 'great, let's go to hobbycraft and spend £75 on materials to make mockups and samples and then we'll see who else wants one making on facebook. You do that, I'll create a business page and find the buy and sell groups'. Bottom line is as someone new to mosaic, whilst it'll be good for him and I'd be really pleased with what he's achieved, the first few months won't be a product of reasonable quality to build a business on.

judas Many products are probably a bit rubbish in early design, but the person deisgning them and working on them has enough knowledge of their area to reflect and improve on it.
Pretty hard to reflect and improve when you're flogging cheap tat in an area you know barely anything about. That's precisely why I'm of the view that people should have a skill and/or grounding in an area before trying to make money from it.

I get what you mean OP.

There’s a vast difference between turning a hobby you’re skilled at into a business, and, say, randomly deciding to try and build a business out of poorly and patchily covering some boring household item in glitter.

To use someone else’s cookie example, I expect that woman could actually bake extremely well, and wasn’t trying to make money selling burnt cookies or floury cookies or cookies she’d mistakenly put salt in rather than sugar.

Wow lindalee you think I’m the bitter, angry and unhappy one? I was merely sharing my opinion on something and asking others what they thought. I’m interested in the views that others are sharing. Your post is just aggressive, presumptuous about my life, and a bit nasty really. As is your following post to stealthpolarbear who was also agreeing with me, which makes your comment about only one poster agreeing with me irrelevant and incorrect.

Don't worry OP. Most people know the difference between someone who is talented launching a business and people who sell tat on facebook (it's why there's some hilarious threads on 'things people sell on facebook'. There's some total shite on those threads).

Whilst it's noble to pretend that some of the tat is amazing and calling it tat is pissing on someone's dreams, the vast majority of people won't tend to part with their cash for something a random woman in town has made. (But they probably would buy from small independent craft people who produce lovely items)

@gendercritter I make nursery and home decor and personalised gifts. I doubt my abilities everyday but I have many returning customers so I guess that's a good sign!

This is a little touchy subject for me as I'm fairly sure most of my friends think I just tinker a bit at home but they don't realise how many orders I get as well as everything else that goes into this tat business. Planning and creating new products, photographing them, writing descriptions, sourcing materials, streamlining packaging, post-office runs, book-keeping and so on. And constantly trying to up one's game.

But I do agree on the point that for instance Etsy is full of tat too. There are some amazing artists but for every talented artisan, there is 10 sellers selling Ikea frames with scrabble tiles. Most of them give up after a while but then another 10 new ones pop up .

I agree with you OP. I'm a massive supporter of people becoming self-employed or starting a business but I just wish these intelligent, capable women would push themselves to do something bigger and more meaningful, that would have the potential to earn them decent money and make a proper contribution to society (ie by solving a big problem, creating jobs for others, generating tax etc). I think it must be really quite depressing to "start a business" selling tat and eventually come to realise nobody wants it and you can't make a living from it.

Planning and creating new products, photographing them, writing descriptions, sourcing materials, streamlining packaging, post-office runs, book-keeping and so on. And constantly trying to up one's game

It sounds like you're doing really well. I wouldn't look at you in real life and think you were just 'tinkering at home.' There will be a huge difference between your business and the plastic glasses covered in glitter, I am sure. You should feel proud of your successes. So many people couldn't replicate what you're doing because as you say, you have to be good at so many areas to make it work (and put the hours in)

Helipad your stuff sounds really nice, and there is clearly a lot of demand for it, so you must be good at what you do. I think you get what I’m talking about though. I LOLed at your example of the scrabble tiles in an Ikea frame. That’s exactly the sort of thing I’m talking about!!

Actually, now I come to think about it.....rushes off to dig out some spare frames, an old scrabble set and some glue.... sets up new website

It sounds like you're doing really well. I wouldn't look at you in real life and think you were just 'tinkering at home.' There will be a huge difference between your business and the plastic glasses covered in glitter, I am sure. You should feel proud of your successes. So many people couldn't replicate what you're doing because as you say, you have to be good at so many areas to make it work (and put the hours in)
I agree.
We got some lovely things for our wedding from a similar type of seller. You can totally tell the difference between someone who is skilled and knows what they're doing vs someone who's dunked household items in glitter / bought knock off kilner jars and filled them with cheap battery powered fairy lights.

WTA? Pin money seriously? Pin money!
Do the posters that have used this term actually know what it means? Probably not.

Why are posters so judgy about others' choices in life?

Maybe enjoying what they do brings happiness.

What a sexist opinionated comment, what makes one happy is good enough for me. It's not all about money don't you know?

Yeah YABU. I think any parent who tries to carry on any form of career alongside child rearing is to be respected.

monty what is your understanding of the term?

To use someone else’s cookie example, I expect that woman could actually bake extremely well, and wasn’t trying to make money selling burnt cookies or floury cookies or cookies she’d mistakenly put salt in rather than sugar.

She didn't bake particularly well at all, but she did put the cookies in nice boxes...

But then the ones selling "tat" won't last will they? Online fees, poor feedback will mean that they are unlikely to have long term success unlessthey learn and up their game.

But at least they have tried.

I gave up a good career and now make and sell craft items online. 30% of my orders are repeat business. I supply shops and other outlets.
I make more profit annually than my OH earns,- and he has a good full time job.

Maybe these people making "tat" are learning, exploring.
Women should be encouraging each other- this is a shameful thread.

In my experience speakout most people who try to start a business in an area they know bugger all about (often tatty crafts) tend to jump from one 'easy money around the kids' idea to another and are often people who find themselves walking into MLMs and MLM hopping.

The only successful flexible businesses I knwo set up by parents to fit around home are where the people running them actually know what they are doing content wise/skill wise. They've made mistakes as they've ran their business (understandably), but they know what they're talking about with regards to product.

Some people are competent in an area, have the skills and knowledge to build a business abd learn and understand the hours and hours of work that goes into it.

Some people are always looking for what they see to be a quick and easy way to make money and to be a #bossbabe. They find themselves doing lots of tat selling and at some point find themselves being an MLM bot.
Not all business plans are equal.

gendercritter Thank you, that was lovely to read

TBH, I think my stuff was bit shite at first Not so bad that it'll make the shite FB tat thread but I slightly cringe when I think of my first creations. I don't know what made me to carry on. I'm glad I did though, I am thousands times better now .

OP - where do your friends sell their stuff?

Actually, now I come to think about it.....rushes off to dig out some spare frames, an old scrabble set and some glue.... sets up new website

Ok Let us know when your riches flood in!

ZibbidooZibbidooZibbidoo do you have Google or shall I do that for you?

Actually, I know what it means, I was just wondering if you did because your outrage suggested otherwise.

Women should be encouraging each other- this is a shameful thread

By that measure we should be supporting friends doing Forever Living or Juice Plus. There's being supportive and there's patronising someone who is producing tat. We can't all be good at everything.

I would rather be supportive of artists and craftsmen who are really skilled and experienced than someone dunking a bottle of alcohol in glitter or wrapping packets of sweets in lots of plastic.

Note that I asked what your understanding of it was. Not Google’s.