To ask whether I should pay these teenagers?

[Puzzledandpissedoff]

One for the Mumsnet jury - I'd very much welcome others' input before deciding

Yesterday I hosted a large garden party and had three 17 year olds to help with serving; everything was prepared, so all this involved was pouring and handing round food and drinks and helping to clear up. The party lasted three hours and I'd offered them £40 each

Unfortunately all three spent practically every moment playing with their phones, leaving me - with the help of two very kind invited friends - to do most of it myself. All reminders were met with "yeah, in a minute", "I'm just ..." and so on, but no actual help

Once the last guest left they refused to do any clearing up; apparently all three had something "really urgent" they had to leave for, but were quick to demand their money. I explained very calmly that I'd have to think about it since they'd done so little, to be met with a chorus of "yeah buts ..." and "it's not faaaiiirrr", followed by numerous texts today asking for their money

So what does everyone think, please ... should I pay?

Next time, don’t coerce teenagers into doing a job they are not qualified to do, do not want to do and which you don’t want to manage

Apart from the fact that waitressing isn’t a job that requires any particular qualifications, I reckon your average teenager would be delighted at being ‘coerced’ into accepting three times the going rate for very simple work. They had a great deal and STILL took the piss.

There's an old saying about employing teens
'if you want a job done, hire a lad.If you want half a job doing, hire two'

Love that, Cary Admittedly I try to think the best of folk until their behaviour proves otherwise, but there's no denying I caught a cold this time

And yes, hadenough - I may well offer the same again as there seems nothing wrong with being kind, but having learned a lesson would definitely ask them to leave if it was abused. Sadly though, no doubt I'd then be criticised for "not giving them enough chances" ...

"Next time, don’t coerce teenagers into doing a job they are not qualified to do, do not want to do..."

@user1499173618 - how, exactly did the OP coerce these poor girls? She offered them paid work - they could have said 'No'. Unless your dictionary has a very different definition of coercion, these girls were NOT coerced! What a silly thing to say.

Suddenly, retrospect, her daughter had a migraine and couldn't possibly have done it?

Right. Not.

Entirely contradicts her continual whining about wanting her money and being exhausted after all that 'hard work' she did for you.

Mum is doing her daughter no favours by playing the pretend game after the continually lying about her day.

She should be embarrassed and have her daughter apologize properly like the other two girls had the grace to do.

I’m in my 40’s and I would love to go to a party where I was allowed a little drink, a lovely sandwich and cake, chatting to people while topping up drinks and making sure everybody had enough to eat. I like clearing up at people’s houses (and cleaning theirfridges too for some weird reason.!?) so it would suit me down to the ground to shove plates ina dishwasher, hand wash glasses to ensure a clean supply and bung serviettes in a bin bag. Then I get paid £40 for this! Cash in hand! To spend on myself - oh yes please.

You did absolutly the right thing Puzzled and hopefully it seems two of them have learned a lesson from this. And as for the idiotic comments from user...........do we think she is an “it’s not ffaaaaiiiiirrrrr” teenager.??

Now, when are you having your next party 🎈 I’ve got my diary here!

Ugh. With the exception of the group mum, they sound awful! Stand your ground. Is anyone else wondering if the user..... posters are the mums or girls involved 😂😂?

My DD did something similar last year with her friend. The lady ended up paying them extra because they were so good.

This year we needed something similar for a bigger group. DD and two friends this time. In fairness to DD (maybe because I was there) she was absolutely brilliant; I was amazed at her work ethic and her confidence with the guests; I had previously always thought she was shy around people she didn't know. The other two girls were worse than bloody useless. The dynamic of three was just totally different to the dynamic of two.

Oh yes you evil slavedriver of these poor children op

I think you need the front it out honestly with all of their parents given that you know them. A simple...

I'm terribly sorry XxXx but as much as I reminded your DD that she was here to work & gave her more than enough chances to pull her socks up & actually do the job that she expected me to pay her for as arranged. She still didn't actually do any work in favour of constantly playing with her phone. I ended up having to accept other help & therefore have no intention of paying the full amount offered as she didn't actually do any work. I'm happy to make a token gesture of £10 as she did turn up, but as she may as well have not bothered, I cannot justify paying her fully for work she didn't do. I do hope you understand my dilemma, especially as I took her on in good faith.

Nope, they did not do the job to the required standard, if you want, just £10 each.

just spotted your update.

I'm glad that worked out okay - migraine my arse, for you. Silly woman will regret that big time when her lazy assed DD still isn't working after loosing job after job in years to come. I'd do my nut if mine took the pee like that & then expect me to sort it out. 🙄

Silly woman will regret that big time when her lazy assed DD still isn't working after loosing job after job in years to come

Actually, this particular daughter used to have a P/T Saturday job waitressing, which she lost; everyone was told it was all the boss's fault, but now I can't help wondering

Is anyone else wondering if the user..... posters are the mums or girls involved 😂😂?

I confess the thought had occurred to me - surely there can't be that many mums who take the same view?

You so did the right thing, I am glad that the others supported you, the dd of the other one with the migrane, is going to be in for a shock, in the cruel hard adult world. Her useless mother is doing nothing to support her work ethic, bosses fault my arse, little Princess probably thought the work was beneath her, and too hard. Sorry little snowflake comes to mind here.

By the way, you don't need qualifications to serve food, pouring and handing drinks round, easy! Its not like they were asked to build a house, or complete nursing duties fgs User1499

I've been following this since the start, but didn't have anything to add. I don't have anything very original now
But - migraine - my arse! She's doing her DD no favours at all.

And well done to Group Member Mum and her DDs. That's a lovely response.

yorkshireyummymummy I'll PM you my postcode... my fridge could do with a cleaning!

I agree with Snowysky20009

I know lots of teens who know how to work. I'm getting a bit cross with the number of people who are saying you have to give them step by step instructions and reminders throughout the party. The point of employing them, was so that the OP could relax and enjoy the party, and not be having to follow people around, checking up on them.

As a few other posters have said, if ever I heard any of my dc had let themselves down like that, they'd be having to apologise to the employer, certainly would NOT be complaining to the employer. I'd be mortified if my dc behaved like that, especially when they got the job through me knowing someone.

Glad the one parents at least, is like those of us who would be disappointed in our dc behaving like that.

Next time, don’t coerce teenagers into doing a job they are not qualified to do, do not want to do and which you don’t want to manage. Employ a professional waitress - she will do an excellent job.
Good grief User, don't be ridiculous. Most teens / students would be delighted with a one off job on such generous pay. Most (IME) would crack on, and do a good job - you never know, someone else at the party might then ask them to do the same elsewhere. What they were asked to do didn't need any training, particular skills, and shouldn't need supervising. You seem to have a very low opinion of all young people, rather than just accepting these particular ones were so daft, and not willing to work for almost twice the minimum wage. Like Yorkshieyummymummy - it sounds quite an appealing job for me, too

Is anyone else wondering if the user..... posters are the mums or girls involved
That did cross my mind too......

Cary - that is a really good saying - not heard it before, but will use it in future

Just to add, for purposes of comparison......a 19-yo relative of mine is at college and also works part-time in a healthcare role, looking after people with complex needs (including dementia).

She routinely works 12-hour shifts. Last year and the year before she worked all over Christmas and was so exhausted she spent her limited time off sleeping. Which to me makes the entitled behaviour OP encountered - over some light handing round of drinks and food, and doing a very small amount of clearing up afterwards - seem even more disgracefully shoddy than it did on first reading.