All men fancy younger women

[Violetshift]

I think I am insanely jealous. So don’t know whether I am BU?

My partner has started tutoring a 19 year old. He is a teacher but she is resisting as she wants a grade 9.

He hasn’t said much about her. I showed him a Facebook picture of her as I know of her. He said she is prettier than that in real life.
Now he thinks this is subjective and nothing untoward. Like he thinks our daughter is pretty.

AIBU and just a jealous hag?

Men get turned on by women with pretty faces, big eyes, full lips, high cheekbones, nice skin tone, good waist to hip ratio, low end of healthy BMI, rounded, high breasts, long legs and luscious hair.

The end.

Ah so it’s my big googly frog eyes and weirdly skinny, lanky legs which did it . I didn’t think of those as a plus points but I’ll take it. I take it all back then. I’m clearly a stone cold fox* !

*I’m joking - I’m really not

Hmmm 'pretty' is subjective. What I find pretty you might not.

Big eyes....nope never heard that one. Smiley, friendly , striking eyes....that's more like it. People trying to make their eyes look big just look manic and/or permanently surprised but that seems to be a 'thing'

Full lips....fair enough but natural looks best and it's subjective.

High cheekbones - never heard a man even mention someone's cheekbones . I hear women comments about them though - I don't think men give a shit tbh.

Nice skin tone - what do you mean?? Again, never heard a man mention skin tone

Waist to hip, BMI etc. Again subjective - some like skinny some like curves

High rounded breasts - some menile big breasts some don't . Again, subjective

Long legs - again subjective

Luscious hair - i get the most compliments from men and women when my hair is in a short pixie cut because that's what suits me best. Again ,. Hugely subjective .

My point - you list is what society has told you men find attractive. The reality is people have different tastes and preferences

I agree with JacintaJones! Sad as it is fantasy is pretty much universal. Who men fancy and who men choose as their partner material are usually different things, as are for many women too.

Not all men fancy younger women... they fancy attractive women just like women fancy attractive men. The end.

Oh my aunts husband is 11 years younger... just saying.

YY to it being subjective. Some men HATE the idea of being with a tall woman (like me). Especially (ime) if they’re short themselves. Obviously that’s not always the case - Jamie Cullum & Sophie Dahl. But long legs is definitely not a universal preference. And agree - big eyes aren’t universally admired either. They tend to suffer more from wrinkles, or not wrinkles, but looking more hooded as we age, (my dad has them too).

Everyone hS their other half in life. Or they don’t and that’s also fine.

I will say though, that I don’t think that everyone necessarily ends up with their ideal fantasy in terms of looks either. If they did, then everyone would be dating Idris Elba or Angelina Jolie! Oh wait... they’re not in their twenties... Pair of fuglies then !

Not all men fancy younger women... they fancy attractive women just like women fancy attractive men. The end

I agree!!

There's a thread on mn about women with younger men. Search for it. I did when I (at 37) started a relationship with a 25 year old who adores me

Men get turned on by women with pretty faces, big eyes, full lips, high cheekbones, nice skin tone, good waist to hip ratio, low end of healthy BMI, rounded, high breasts, long legs and luscious hair.The end

Thats just bollocks though. I mean, some do, sure. 'But other men get turned on by small breasts, or huge women, or skinny rake women, or tiny women, or short hair, or none of these. There is no "men like X the end", its ludicrous.

I agree, it's pretty offensive to men really

Fine I'll qualify it;
The vast majority of men are turned on by the above physical attributes.
They're just universally attractive.
Men want to have sex primarily with women with those qualities.

You can get upset and deny it but it won't change anything.

Still not true. Its not the vast majority of men at all. They are not universally attractive by any stretch of your fevered imagination.

Its fine to disagree with me, no skin off my nose.

Are you quite young @jacinta ? That's the sort of thing I thought / said when I was young and only really knew boys and immature young men

Have conversations with men and you'll find it's far more nuanced and complex

I agree with Jacinta, broadly. What men will tell a woman who enquires on this topic is not always what he actually thinks. Sensible men don't engage in discussions like this with women.

I'm not 'young' and whilst I think that some men might give an opinion different to Jacinta's, these would possibly be men who wouldn't generally consider themselves 'worthy' of the 'ideal'. It's not nuanced or complex in my opinion, it's biological.

Nature's green is gold. True that.

Well of course its fine to disagree with you, because you are wrong!

I'm not 'young' and whilst I think that some men might give an opinion different to Jacinta's, these would possibly be men who wouldn't generally consider themselves 'worthy' of the 'ideal'. It's not nuanced or complex in my opinion, it's biological

Wow, you realise you just said to all the women on this thread who are not young, slim, big breasted clear skinned beauties that men are lying about fancying them and if they do its only because they think they aren't worthy of someone better and actually attractive?

I'm talking of a normal distribution, there are exceptions to everything and preferences outside 'normal'.

Who are you asking when you talk to these men, Blaa? Partner? Male friend? Colleague? Anyone else who doesn't want to be thought of as a pleb or Neanderthal?

I'm not at all convinced of the veracity or accuracy of reporting 'what men think'. Look at the reality of dating sites? Not every man is on a dating site but a fair representation are. They are generally not looking for women the same age but as young as they feel they are capable of attracting, however unattractive they themselves may be.

It's not the same for women regardless of the ones who say that their partner is x-years younger and it's happy ever after. This isn't the norm, as uncomfortable as that is. It's just not.

Miggeldy, you can infer that if you like. There are other things than physical attraction that make a partnership work well.

Attraction is subjective. I personally do not understand the Benedict Cumberbatch fascination. It takes all sorts and I'm sure that works both ways - and before you jump on me for that, the BC fans seem to be legion and committed in their adoration of him.

I'm not inferring, that is what you said.

Attraction is subjective, so why would you agree with someone who thinks all men want one particular look and only that, and then say that if they pretend otherwise its a self esteem issue?

There is definitely a ‘classically attractive / beautiful’ woman. I think most people would accept that. There’s a whole beauty industry built around making women look as close to that ideal as possible, if that’s what they want to do. And @Jacinta has kind of described it basically (except the long legs and big eyes which I don’t quite get - they’ve never made me feel very attractive, but maybe I’m a blip as pp said). The question for me is if it’s an innate “turn on” as @jacinta says, or if it’s just culturally ingrained..?

Do you know what strikes me most about this thread? The fact that we’ve managed to go on for this many pages, dissecting what men find sexually attractive. Fucking male gaze. I bet the sexist, arsholes of the male variety would just love this thread. Just my take on it obviously.

Because I DO think that, Miggeldy, subject to the self-preservation caveats that many men and women put in place for themselves.

I've been quite clear and I'm allowed to disagree/agree with anybody I want to.

Cake, there are just as many sexist, arseholes who are women. Some of the threads ad posts on here about certain male celebrities are disgusting (in my opinion). But when a woman says it, it's fine... No. No it isn't.

What people think privately is one thing, when they behave like arseholes in public, that's something else.

What's amazed me is the number of women that have managed to convince themselves that what Jacinta described is the 'ideal' and that's is due to simple biology.

That is the ideal that we have been conditioned into believing men want. It has fuck all to do with biology because if it was, we would be looking for child bearing hips etc because that's what sex is essentially all about - reproduction!

Of course there is the concept of classical beauty and attractiveness but that doesn't automatically mean sexual attraction and it changes over time. I have never been sexually attracted to Brad Pitt but I can appreciate that he's attractive.

I've never specifically asked men if they find Jacinta's ideal sexually attractive but I've spent enough time with a wide range of men to understand that some will and some would say that's not my type. Sexual attraction is incredibly subjective.

I'm bi-sexual and have my own ideas of what I find sexually attractive in women and it's very different to what DH would say.

Because I DO think that, Miggeldy, subject to the self-preservation caveats that many men and women put in place for themselves

so you think its subjective and everyone likes different things, but you also agree with the poster who said its not subjective and all men like one particular type of women?

It's also pretty racist, this notion that the described female type is universally attractive and all men everywhere like that and its biological. Think how many women from around the world do not fir that type at all.
Attraction is cultural, and psychological, and social.

Some of the threads ad posts on here about certain male celebrities are disgusting (in my opinion). But when a woman says it, it's fine... No. No it isn't.

What threads are you talking about? Threads where people say they find celebrities attractive/ not attractive? That’s not necessarily sexist. Not that I’m a massive fan of those threads either, but that’s not at all what I mean by the male, sexist arseholes who I speculated might love this thread.

The notion that a bunch of women have tied themselves in knots trying to “prove” what’s sexy to men would appeal to some, not very nice, men.

I can’t imagine a predominantly male forum thread going into this much detail over what precise physique and facial features women find sexy.

Male gaze is a thing and we are all victims of it. Female gaze..? Don’t think it’s a thing. .