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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think I'm not a tart and tell him to fuck off?

490 replies

treeofhearts · 28/05/2018 01:13

I see a Chiropractor and a Physiotherapist weekly for a painful skeletomuscular condition and have done for years. This is necessary to maintain mobility in my spine and reduce pain. I've been with DP for 8 months and he has known about my condition since we met.

Last week he came with me to the appointment for the first time. I didn't consider it a big deal, there is no reason he has never come with me, I just usually go when he is at work but he is off this time and came along.

He has absolutely flipped his shit, calling me a tart, naive and all sorts and referred to the clinic as a fucking perverts paradise.

The reason for this little tantrum? They are all men. And it never occured to his tiny brain that in order to have spinal adjustments, I would have to take my top off.

Apparently I'm having an affair with them. All 3 of them, possibly at once, he wasn't clear on this bit and the massage therapist undoing my bra constitutes sexual contact which is cheating. Hmm

For clarity, the (very professional) massage therapist has me remove my top and then lay face down before unfastening my bra and leaving it open so it still covers my breasts. Afterwards he wipes the oil away and does it back up before I get up. At no point does he cop an eyeful.

I'm clearly having an emotional affair with the Physio because we were talking about films that had made us cry while he was twisting me into unnatural shapes and sticking needles into me because apparently men don't do that unless they are interested and the Chiro was disrespecting him by hugging me when I walked in. He hugs everyone and flirts with anything with a pulse! It's just how he is.

Oh and it's not even legal for me to be half undressed alone in a building with 3 men.

Give me fucking strength. AIBU to tell him I just don't have the energy for this shit and to grow up or fuck off?

I have been going to this clinic every week for years! I have known the 3 of them for years, especially the Physio who actually saved my life a few years back by talking me out of suicide and confiscating my medication for 4 days to make sure I didn't take too many of them. None of them have ever so much as taken an inappropriate glance let alone a liberty and are completely trustworthy.

He will not let this drop. It's doing my head in. Constantly trying to trip me up with probing questions about them and my treatment. I am seriously considering telling him to fuck off to his mothers.

OP posts:
tiredybear · 01/06/2018 20:11

woah, shit got serious pretty quickly then! Really glad you're ok OP!

AskAuntLydia · 01/06/2018 20:12

Wow.

Just shows you always have to be careful when men show their true colours.

Most of the time, they just bugger off.

But just occcasionally they turn out like this one. And because you don't know up front, which ones will and which ones won't, you have to exercise the precautionary principle.

Gemini69 · 01/06/2018 20:16

UUrrggghhh that is disgusting....

I'm glad you're okay OP... Flowers

MiddleClassProblem · 01/06/2018 20:17

Omg!

daisyboooo · 01/06/2018 20:18

You can have my first LTB too.

Having had many chiropractic sessions myself I know this is the norm.

And the fact that you are at ease with the doctors at the clinic means that you get the best treatment by being fully relaxed, thus making docs work easier. Anybody who has had all this bending & twisting done will know how strange it is & being familiar with the doctors is a blessing in disguise.

What an absolute tool your partner is !

Justanothernameonthepage · 01/06/2018 20:19

Am glad you are ok op.

SandunesAndRainclouds · 01/06/2018 20:20

You’ve really had a lucky escape. Run for the hills and don’t look back!

DragonMummy1418 · 01/06/2018 20:29

Update us please OP!

pinkpantsrock · 01/06/2018 20:31

.

AviatorShades · 01/06/2018 20:37

Just...Bloody HellShock

Flowers and Wine for you OP. Lots of WineWineWine, guess you need it.

Ginkypig · 01/06/2018 20:39

Oh my goodness, I came back to this thread assuming there either wouldn't have been an update or maybe a small one that he had txt a few times but I wasn't expecting this!

Hope your ok tree!

FireInTheMole · 01/06/2018 20:54

Christ he's fucked it now hasn't he? Be glad you found out now. Hope you're ok.

SparklyMagpie · 01/06/2018 21:28

Whaaat?

Shona52 · 01/06/2018 21:32

FFS he needs to grow up 🤦‍♀️

RomeoBunny · 01/06/2018 21:34

What did he do?!?! Shock

Motoko · 01/06/2018 22:18

Wow, it's probably a good job you weren't there Tree. Thank fuck you took the advice and dumped his arse.

treeofhearts · 01/06/2018 22:21

Right. Well. He turned up early this morning, knocked and I opened the door thinking it was the postman. He asked if we could sort things out and I said no, that I had seen a side of him I really didn't like and I didn't want to sort things out. He said it was my fault anyway and that no man would have liked the idea of their "woman" (???!) being felt up by some other blokes. I pointed out that there was no feeling up happening and that he had been a complete twat and I really wasn't interested in dealing with this shit every time we have a row.

He said it was fucking pointless trying to talk to me and I had probably been fucking them since the start. I lost my rag a bit, shouted at him that they were looking more appealing by the minute but I'd rather fuck Donald Trump than him (yes I know, very mature) and called me waste of space and stormed off.

Several hours later I was queuing up in Asda, delighted with my half price Pringles and blissfully unaware of the drama unfolding and heard my phone ringing. I ignored it as I had my hands full with bags but it kept ringing all the way back to the car, again and again. So I checked it before I went home and found 4 missed calls and 2 frantic voicemails from the clinic asking if I was ok and to call them straight away.

Turns out, after he left me, he went there and started accusing them of all sorts, demanding to talk to massage therapist who thankfully wasn't there, saying I'd admitted to sleeping with them so why don't they just "come outside and fucking settle this." They told him to leave and called the police when he wouldn't. Apparently he even shouted at another patient, asking her if she was banging them too!

Police arrived, tried to calm things down at which point he picked up the bin and threw it at chiro. Police officer went to restrain him, he spat at her and he left in cuffs.

The clinic then tried to contact me to see if I was alright and when I didn't answer they put two and two together, came up with 6 and decided he'd killed me. I came home to find the police in my house, having been let in by my neighbour.

I have made a statement, as have my neighbours, the clinic staff and the woman he shouted at there and he is still being held at the police station at the moment. So this thread may end up going zap due to it being an upcoming court case, depending on what they manage to charge him with.

It's a good job they are behind me for a lot of my treatments as I may never look any of them in the face again.

So there you have it. I have terrible taste in men and I may end my life a spinster with 20 cats rather than ever date again.

OP posts:
CantankerousCamel · 01/06/2018 22:24

Oh my goodness. What a fucking nutter

Gemini69 · 01/06/2018 22:25

jesus OP... what a DICK... you are well shot Flowers

ToeToToe · 01/06/2018 22:26

Jeez... OP. Glad you are ok. What a nutjob.

Frogscotch7 · 01/06/2018 22:27

I think you sound hilarious and very sensible and your self respect shines through your posts. if I was a nice man I’d fall in love with you. I don’t think you’ll end up a spinster. You just had a bit of bad luck.

HolyMountain · 01/06/2018 22:30

Look on the bright side, you found out he was a test before you moved in with him or married him .

Stay safe kid Smile

DeadGood · 01/06/2018 22:30

Oh wow OP! Hope you are ok!

Merryoldgoat · 01/06/2018 22:30

Fuck.

You had a narrow escape! Thank god you realised - what a scary thing to go through.

HolyMountain · 01/06/2018 22:30

*twat