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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU Furious SIL asked me to leave BBQ because of impetigo

300 replies

ohheytheregentleelephant · 27/05/2018 18:56

I am so embarrassed and angry. Bank holiday weekend bbq is big deal in my family every year - we all make different dishes to take, there's bouncy castle and games and a cocktail bar.

I've got impetigo. I told DM and DF this - it's their bbq - and they didn't seem bothered so I made the dishes I'd been asked to make and turned up for the bbq today.

SIL went mad when she realised I have impetigo and wouldn't let them put the dishes I made out and basically caused a scene in front of my parents and dbro and my dp insisting that I leave. Luckily before all the other guests arrived or that would have been even more embarrassing. She wasn't shouting or anything but she made me feel like a right idiot.

In the end I did leave - with the food I had spent ages making! What a waste. And had to miss out on the day that I'd been looking forward to for ages. It's not even that contagious!

OP posts:
Wheretheresawill1 · 27/05/2018 20:57

I’ve had it last week- I took 48hrs off work as non contagious after 48hr antibiotic therapy but I still didn’t chance seeing my friends newborn on Saturday- apart from looking dire I didn’t want to chance infecting anyone

PoorYorick · 27/05/2018 20:59

Yes, you were completely in the wrong.

Who cares that your parents okayed it? Did everyone else there consent to being in such close proximity with a highly contagious disease?

Zfactorstar · 27/05/2018 21:02

I've worked as a massage therapist and impetigo is one of the few diseases that we absolutely could not allow anywhere near us or our work space considering how contagious it is. It it did come in contact we would have to cancel all appointments, completely disinfect, and go to a doctor for preventative treatment. You don't mess around with it at all. If I was at your BBQ and found out that you had it and I was in contact with you or anything you handled I would be out of work for at least a week as a preventative measure.

Tutlefru · 27/05/2018 21:06

YABVU.

Surely you know yourself how contagious it is?! Regardless of what your parents said surely anyone with an ounce of common sense would see that preparing food wouldn't be wise...

lifechangesforever · 27/05/2018 21:07

OP: AIBU
Everyone: Yes
OP: Doesn't accept and argues anyway

Obviously, your parents didn't know the consequences of infection. You're the one who has the infection, you should have known not to prepare food and not to go.

OlennasWimple · 27/05/2018 21:11

Sorry, you were in the wrong here. I've had impetigo, and it's annoying because you don't feel ill but it isn't something that you would want to pass on to anyone else either

theWarOnPeace · 27/05/2018 21:22

For anyone saying the SIL was rude... in all honesty, if my SIL turned up to a BBQ with impetigo and your attitude, I would have called her something like a stupid fucking idiot and certainly wouldn’t have eaten her food. I would have left if she refused to go. Nobody wants bloody impetigo FFS, and who cares if your parents said it was fine???

kaytee87 · 27/05/2018 21:24

Well you should have stayed at home.
I had it as a young teen and had to stay off school for a week.

WilburIsSomePig · 27/05/2018 21:33

She handled it like a twat, if your version of events is as you say.

BUT, for the love of God what the hell were you thinking? Why on earth would you even think of going?

I'm guessing the OP won't ever accept that she was unreasonable.

GalwayWayfarer · 27/05/2018 21:37

It sounds like she was very rude so I understand you being upset. However, while I don't know anything about it PPs are pretty unanimous that it's very contagious so I do understand why she felt you shouldn't have been there. I'm sorry for you though, sounds like a shit day.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 27/05/2018 21:40

Why do people keep saying the SIL was rude and handled it badly. What exactly did she do wrong? How was she rude?

coconutpie · 27/05/2018 21:40

You must be really bloody stupid to think you could prepare food and rock up to a party with impetigo. Was your only purpose to just infect everyone with that disease? You're either really stupid or really selfish and you owe your sister an apology. This is how all this shit spreads like wildfire because people like you just don't even care!

Choosegopse · 27/05/2018 21:43

Ok, so it seems like you just asked your parents but since when are they medical experts? A quick call to NHS Direct or even a google would have told you not to go.

Though if I was SI I would have just left myself.

overduemamma · 27/05/2018 22:01

Impetigo is contagious but surely no one would of been kissing you? I assume you wash your hands. I don't see the problem here. SIL is bang out of order, someone at my work currently has it. Doesn't bother me one but whereas someone coming near me who had D&V.... now that bothers me! X

ProperLavs · 27/05/2018 22:14

My kids and I had it for ages , years ago, we just kept passing it round the family, I even had it in ,y armpits! We had to give nasal swabs to the dr in the end. You shouldn't have gone op, no way. One of my dd's had a form of it on her legs it was so bad.

Neolara · 27/05/2018 22:19

My dd got impetigo. It took 18 months for it to go. Was grim.. Very contagious until you've taken antibiotics.

lljkk · 27/05/2018 22:20

stayed at home till it cleared up

For 2 weeks? DS has treatment for 2 weeks & we still weren't sure it was gone but got fed up with the cream by then & 2 weeks was when GP said to stop. It is gone, now.

DS had it on/off for weeks before we got treatment, so we took no precautions not knowing he had something, nobody caught it off him.

Unless it was on her hands I'd eat the food that OP had prepared. (shrug)

Whatthefoxgoingon · 27/05/2018 22:25

You are remarkably stupid OP.

Would you jump off a bridge if your parents told you to? Maybe engage your brain like a grown up next time eh?

kissthealderman · 27/05/2018 22:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

givemesteel · 27/05/2018 22:38

Let's hope you don't get an STD if you're this blasé about infectious diseases OP.

Very unfair decision, it would be a nightmare for someone to get infected who didn't get sick leave, so literally couldn't provide for their family.

Dancingmonkey87 · 27/05/2018 22:38
Biscuit
Clavinova · 27/05/2018 22:49

Haven't read the whole thread but impetigo is a common cause of food poisoning - that's why the NHS website tells you not to prepare food for other people.

Bojangles33 · 27/05/2018 22:54

God people are so grim. Of course YABU. Why on earth would you think it's ok to prepare food for people when you've got a highly contagious infection?!?

3333hh44 · 27/05/2018 23:23

Impetigo is contagious, which means that you could spread it to other people. That's why people with impetigo should keep the sores covered when they go to school or other public places. After you take the medicine for least 24 hours, the impetigo isn't contagious anymore. After 3 days, the sores should begin to heal.
Impetigo - KidsHealth
kidshealth.org › kids › impetigo

I think people on here are being rather out.

3333hh44 · 27/05/2018 23:23

Ott

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