To wonder what you think about people with disabilities buying sex

[huha]

Here is a link: tlc-trust.org.uk

I personally was at first 😲😲😲 but now am thinking 🤔...maybe this is a good thing?? AIBU?

Oh my god. How often is it really a willing seller? How can you believe that and why on earth do you want to believe it so much?

The gigolo scenario is ignored because it is so uncommon whereas millions of women are enslaved, trafficked, abused and raped for the sexual gratification of men. And that is simply not happening the other way around. To say that prostitution has nothing to do with misogyny and the oppression of women is a disgraceful, disgusting, shameful lie.

Would you accept unemployed women being forced into prostitution by the job centre? i.e. take this job or get your benefits cut?

Disturbingly,

As for being paid to take the risk of being injured (and that is what it is): miners, armed forces (most of all and for not that much pay), many factory workers throughout the world, deep sea divers, those who compete for money in risky sports etc

sigh. Keep turning it round. But what about women who....?

Have you ever paid for sex?

Prostitution would not meet the health and safety standards demanded in this country for jobs.

Tell us more about your experience with women in the sex trade, Larry.

Women are not trafficking men. Women are not raping men. Women are not selling men to other women. It’s not happening. Women aren’t bragging online about how they ‘ruined’ or ‘smashed’ a man. You cannot pretend this isn’t about male power, male violence and male sense of entitlement. It’s such a pathetic attempt at derailing to try to pretend that’s happening.

As for being paid to take the risk of being injured (and that is what it is): miners, armed forces (most of all and for not that much pay), many factory workers throughout the world, deep sea divers, those who compete for money in risky sports etc

How many people in those roles are coerced, trafficked, abused etc etc?

I mean risky sport - to be good enough to play professionally is the very zenith for anyone who plays sport, rather than falling into it out of desperation!

Excellent point about the job centre, crunchy.

Never paid for sex.

Never fancied it as I prefer mutual enjoyment or none, but I am not that partial to paying poor people lots of money to tell me how wonderful I look as they primp my hair for hours at a time either.

Personal choice as long as overage and willing.

Do those saying that it should be made illegal really believe that the majority of prostitutes are trafficked or exploited?

which rule of misogyny is this? It the ‘whatever happens to women is worse when it happens to men’ one...

A dangerous job is not the same as being enslaved, trafficked, drugged abused and raped. And then being forced to keep being raped, daily. Miners have unions, safety kit, training, rules, regulations etc. It’s their time and skill that’s being bought, not their bodies.
I know several commercial divers. Some ex SBS. Now that is a dangerous job. It’s also very well paid and again, nobody is raping them daily. Thus it’s not actually relevant in any way.

Have you ever paid for sex?

Jacques,

There is a long history of conscripting young men into the armed services.

Even today, many countries have a year of compulsory service and, if there is a war during that time....well, as risky as it gets.

believe that the majority of prostitutes are trafficked or exploited?

Yes. The vast, vast majority are either exploited, coerced or trafficked. The well paid independent contractor types are a very small, niche area.

There is a long history of conscripting young men into the armed services

Indeed. Which I also have issue with. But it isn’t comparible to prostitution

There is a long history of conscripting young men into the armed services.

Not compulsory rape though, is it? Why do you keep on with this analogy? It’s crap.

My employer buys my time and skill and knowledge. They don’t buy my body. There’s a bit of a difference. Nobody is fucking me daily when I don’t want them to.

As for being paid to take the risk of being injured (and that is what it is): miners, armed forces (most of all and for not that much pay), many factory workers throughout the world, deep sea divers, those who compete for money in risky sports etc

They are paid for the risk, and required to follow health and safety regulations to minimise that risk. They are not required to exchange body fluids with customers during their jobs, nor take on excessive risk of infection. In any job where those are a risk, there are many requirements around wearing gloves, guards (so that body fluids cannot go into a worker's face) etc. This protective wear must be appropriately disposed of.

As I said, if prostitutes were to follow reasonably H&S standards - as dentists, miners, and deep sea divers certainly do, then I would be more open to the idea of it being a job - but until then, it's not, it's clearly exploitation.

Jacques,

‘It isn’t comparable to prostitution’

It just is not comparable with your internal rule that everything has to have a sexist dynamic and only women are paid a small amount to do unpleasant risky jobs.

“I always find that the gigolo/Gambian beach scene is ignored or brushed away. It is not a male/female thing but a money and power vs sex thing”

Happy to say that shouldn’t happen either. Can we move on? Because as far as I know, women aren’t paying poor men a tenner for hand relief in the back alleys of our towns and cities. Women are not shipping men in from Eastern European countries and pimping them out to lap dancing clubs so women can have a “private dance” while they are away on business trips.

I have another question Larry. If this theoretical disabled man is able to converse coherently enough to make it known to their carer that they enthusiastically consent to and need sex, why are they not capable of getting laid by any other route?

How do we know - in the example of the person man being so disabled they cannot go about the usual routes to sex that can be perfectly successful - that the woman isn't inadvertantly being paid to assault them? Because their carer assumes they must want sex?

I mean it's a stretch, sure, but it's possible.

“It just is not comparable with your internal rule that everything has to have a sexist dynamic and only women are paid a small amount to do unpleasant risky jobs.”

What are you talking about? Lots of men do unpleasant risky jobs for not much money.

It just is not comparable with your internal rule that everything has to have a sexist dynamic and only women are paid a small amount to do unpleasant risky jobs

No I just disagree with all the roles you supposedly compared to prostitution as being “unpleasant risky jobs”.

If you think prostitution is about anything other than women suffering through the patriarchy you’re either wilfully ignorant or choosing a bizarre agenda to try and push.

Do you know anyone in the sex trade?

It just is not comparable with your internal rule that everything has to have a sexist dynamic

I don't think it's right for women or men to buy male prostitutes either.

I don’t agree with conscription. What does it have to do with prostitution?

Again, how is what a hairdresser does comparable to what a prostitute does?

I am not that partial to paying poor people lots of money to tell me how wonderful I look as they primp my hair for hours at a time either.

Some interesting ideas here going on about the women you’re talking to. You’re very invested in the vision that we’re all wealthy women, paying a fortune for cleaners and ‘hair primpers’, and only your enlightened self knows what it’s like for the women being paid to do any of these jobs, or indeed be in the sex trade. Despite having no experience of hiring women for any of these jobs yourself, of course.

My friend cut my hair for free yesterday. I am baking her a cake to say thanks. Does this make her equivalent to a prostitute and me a customer? I really hope not.