To wonder what you think about people with disabilities buying sex

[huha]

Here is a link: tlc-trust.org.uk

I personally was at first 😲😲😲 but now am thinking 🤔...maybe this is a good thing?? AIBU?

Yy bran

When ever this topic comes up, it’s is ALWAYS about disabled men buying sex from women. Never once in my life have I heard of a father buying his disabled daughter sex, for example. It’s just reinforcing this idea that men are entitled to sex, no matter what the cost to women.

I was forced into prostitution some years ago. I was bought for disabled men by their carers and sometimes parents. Some of the men hadn't even asked for it, their family just thought they would like it! Sometimes carers stayed in the room.
Nobody needs sex. Nobody has to buy someone.
There's often no way of telling if the woman wants to be there either, because I did not but was told to say I did if anyone asked so the man selling me was free of repercussion.

Sorry about that vampire. Yet I bet the men and others involved justify it to themselves and others that you were there of your own free will and probably made a lot of money and were empowered.

@larrygrylls
Who has the right to cancel surgery on people in pain or need or to employ carers on minimum wage so someone can avoid dieting.

Do you thinks bariatric surgery is “a shortcut” and/or cosmetic? Bariatric surgery is actually a money-saver for the National Health in the long run as far, FAR more people are able to lose significant amounts of weight and KEEP IT OFF, reversing costly illnesses like diabetes.

Aside from anything else, bariatric surgery is not “the easy way out”. Yes patients drop weight quickly but they have to stick to a very tough pre-op diet, endure an operation and follow a very strict meal plan in the long term.

Allocating healthcare to people based on “worthiness” or perceived personal accountability is neither feasible nor desirable. What if the person who needed an operation to relieve awful pain had acquired that injury in a skiing accident? They chose to go skiing.

I really recommend this video:

(Sorry to derail)

As a disabled person... no one is entitled to sex.

Turd,

However, it is perfectly possible for grossly obese people to drop weight by modifying their diet.

Yes, it is a money saver but rather sad that the choice is treat all the co morbities or enter into expensive and risky surgery,

You could argue that treating a depressed disabled person to a prostitute also saves money.

My point was that different people claim different ‘needs’ depending on income and personal preference.

Human beings really need relatively little, not sex, not IVF and certainly not bariatric surgery. And each time you address one of these needs, it has a cost to someone else on society.

..treating a depressed disabled person to a prostitute

You do not treat someone to a woman.

Women are not ice creams.

You could argue that treating a depressed disabled person to a prostitute also saves money

What a nauseating sentence.

Funny you can buy someone to pamper your hair or clean your loos for money and that is fine.

But if someone willingly sellls sex it is not.

If you don’t approve of selling sex, don’t sell it. Your choice.

larrygrylls

But would anyone ever say 'treat yourself to a hairdresser'? No. They would say 'Treat yourself to a care cut.' It's an interesting linguistic difference that reflects a difference between the two acts.

*hair cut

Funny you can buy someone to pamper your hair or clean your loos for money and that is fine

You don’t buy someone. You buy a service they offer. A marked difference between that and physically buying someone’s body.

And if you do not think being a prostitute is so bad, (ie judging the women who are) why the outrage at anyone possibly being compared with one??

Just gonna double check my post for outrage

Nope

I dont give a shiny shit if some random on the internet says something i dont agree with

But i think its worth saying (in a not outraged way) that i dont agree

Cutting hair and cleaning toilets are not equivalent to sex.

Savin money isn’t a consideration when we are talking about selling women’s bodies.

Why can you not see that sex is different?

But Jaques the fact is it’s not the same marked difference as any other type of service. And it is also in the face of centuries upon centuries of treating women as objects. I do not believe it should be acceptable, because it is based on a legacy of oppression and objectification. Sorry for repeating myself.

If you don’t approve of selling sex, don’t sell it. Your choice.

Because all the women are there willingly and enthusiastically

Have you ever paid for sex?

Jumping in

Sex is not a human right.

Men are really REALLY committed to the idea of protecting all those happy, wealthy, and liberated entrepreneurial women in the sex trade from the tyranny of us mean feminists, aren’t they? Just warms your heart, it does.

I do not believe it should be acceptable, because it is based on a legacy of oppression and objectification. Sorry for repeating myself

You misunderstand me. I don’t believe using women as a commodity is acceptable either.

Regardless,

If it is a willing buyer, willing seller, what is the real issue?

I always find that the gigolo/Gambian beach scene is ignored or brushed away. It is not a male/female thing but a money and power vs sex thing.

And the mental gymnastics to abhor the buyer but not blame the seller, even if they are openly advertising and persuading must give rise to cognitive dissonance. Hey, let’s assume all pushers are exploited (most are pawns within a much larger structure) but all drug buyers and users are intrinsically evil.

You will never eradicate prostitution, as most know so the best to be done is to make it as safe as possible for those practising.

If it is a willing buyer, willing seller, what is the real issue

This money they're saving on the depressed person, have you balanced that about the PTSD therapy, sexual health testing and treatment etc. that the prostituted woman will require?

Can you give me another situation where you're allowed to pay someone to injure them? I was trying to think about something like Boxing, but then you're both paid to do it, - you can't just pay someone to be allowed to hit them, and if you had a communicable disease, you wouldn't pass the pre-fight tests to be allowed to fight - you wouldn't be able to put your opponent in danger like that.

Well for one your assertion that one may ‘treat themselves to a woman.’ That’s really unpleasant - don’t you see that? You don’t treat yourself to a person. The very idea is abhorrent, the phrasing is abhorrent.

It’s irrelevant if an individual prostitute is willing. The whole industry contributes to the idea that woman are something men can just treat themselves to. It feeds trafficking, rape, crime and enslavement. Of women and of children.

Your average City cokehead makes the same argument - bit of fun, work hard play hard, everyone knows what they’re doing - but behind it all is a chain of human misery.

You say sellers are as bad as buyers because they’re out soliciting. For gods sake of course they are - many have pimps to keep happy. The power differential is not with the prostitute.

Men who buy sex have no regard for women. If you’re buying sex you are part of a vast web of misery. The only mental gymnastics here are on the part of the Johns.

Disabled men have no more or less right to sex than any of us (ie none.)

You will never eradicate prostitution, as most know so the best to be done is to make it as safe as possible for those practising.

People said that about drink driving and smoking in pubs. And yet, look how far we've come. I'm fine with doing what we can by making it completely socially unacceptable to buy a woman to wank into.

Bowl,

And women who buy sex?