To wonder what you think about people with disabilities buying sex

[huha]

Here is a link: tlc-trust.org.uk

I personally was at first 😲😲😲 but now am thinking 🤔...maybe this is a good thing?? AIBU?

Nope. No one is judging the women (or men) in the trade. Just the users.

And yes, divorces should divide up assets, of course they should. Weird analogy.

My friend used to be a cleaner; I’ll ask her if she feels it was equivalent to prostitution. I’m guessing not, btw.

And absolutely, I want to discuss the men paying for sex and their morality. I have nothing but contempt for them. I don’t judge the prostitutes at all, not do I feel threatened by them.

You may see it as offensive if I ask what has been traded when a women is financially supported by a man.

Sorry, are you saying that SAHMs are a type of prostitute? Do you see the role of a SAHM to be nothing more than there for sex for her husband?

But still the judgement of prostitutes.....

The women are being judged for doing something that most of those doing the judging know very little about. You don't know how much they get paid, or what they do for it, or whether they enjoy it more or less than they enjoyed any other jobs they have done. You assume they are all forced into it, hate it, are drug addicts and are sometimes lower than you.

And there are plenty of male prostitutes

Women in divorces are not asking for money for the sex they provided.

@PaintedHorizons no one is judging the women. It's been said more than once. You repeating it over and over again won't make it true

Oh. You see explanation as judgement? That's ... weird.

There was an interview with a female user of this site on Radio 5Live a couple of days ago. She is disabled and has been a victim of rape. She wad very positive about her experiences of the 'service.' It was very interesting.

53rd,

And when you were a cleaner (assuming this is actually true), I assume you got up every morning looking forward to various aspects of your exciting, intellectually enriching job? Which aspect did you find the most exciting?

Or did you, like most people, do it for the money?

By the way I admire anyone who is prepared to go out and work. Far better than sitting on your arse and depending on others.

Purple,

That is pretty offensive to prostitutes who are also providing a legal service.

A friend was a live in carer for someone with a disability who used hook ups on internet sites for sex. The friend used to have a break when this was going on but were very concerned that they could return to find that the disabled person had been attacked, robbed or worse because they had let strangers into their home.

Tell me if a man got no sex, no housework, nothing from a women - would he financially support her??

If a woman got no sex, no "help in the house", nothing from a man but "love" - would she financially support him - and give him half her house?? I have seen enough "cocklodger" therads to know that is not the case.

And if you do not think being a prostitute is so bad, (ie judging the women who are) why the outrage at anyone possibly being compared with one??

Painted, what do you think the ratio is of male to female prostitutes. More pertinently, what do you think the ratio is of male to female purchasers of sex? It’s meeting an overwhelmingly male demand and it’s mainly women who are providing the sex. A huge number of them are trafficked or exploited, I don’t see how you can pretend that doesn’t happen in vast numbers.

I don’t think prostitutes are lower than me, or cleaners or shelf stackers. I do despise men who use prostitutes far more than anyone who hires a cleaner or shops inn a supermarket.

But still the judgement of prostitutes.....

Where?

When I’m criticising industry reliance on sweatshops, it’s not because I’m ‘judging’ the sweatshop workers. When I’m criticising the policies which leave people homeless, it’s not because I’m shaming rough sleepers. But weirdly when it comes to men’s right to buy women for sex, the men doing it are quietly marched off into the conversational background in a chorus of “how dare you shame the prostitutes, you judgy judger!”

Weird. Wonder why that is. Can’t even begin to imagine.

Rebel and you repeating that no-one is judging prostitutes won't make it true either.

Why the outrage at being compared with one then if it's such a respected profession??

larry why do you think cleaning is equivalent to sex? It’s such a bizarre comparison. Lots of people don’t love their jobs, i don’t believe that only exciting jobs should exist. But I do believe that no one should get raped at work.

Actually I go back to the "ignore derailers" comment.

Must stop biting

Not all people who sell sex for money are trafficked - that is as naive as beleiving that there is no trafficking - which is clearly not true

And there are plenty of male prostitutes

There are a few male prostitutes. A most of those service men not women.

Do we think women, disabled or otherwise, aren't entitled to sex in the way that men are?

Painted, a lot of people have made the point that it isn’t a respected profession. Men buying sex don’t respect women. I judge the customers, not the prostitutes. Clearly, the women in this ‘industry’ are exploited and assaulted in vast numbers and they are not commanding respect and high salaries. That doesn’t mean I look down on them. I am not outraged on behalf of cleaners that larry is comparing them to prostitutes; I’m outraged on behalf of the prostitutes that larry is blithely brushing off the reality of what they do by comparing it to cleaning someone’s bathroom. When what they do exposes them to far greater risk of harm.

Captain,

It is not rape with consent. Rape has a very specific definition.

You have no right to tell women under what conditions you permit them to consent.

So if I decide to go out this evening on an internet hook-up that makes it clear that it is not a "love and marriage" website but a "sex" website and a guy buys me dinner and I let him and I sleep with him because, hey, it's ok and it's dinner - that's fine. But if he gives me £50 in cash and I buy my own dinner with it - that's rape?

Anyway - it's Saturday morning and there is stuff to do.

Captain,

You cannot rewrite your previous post. It still stands as originally written.

53rd that is such a good point about sweat shop workers.

You never hear people saying 'but it's the sweat shop workers choice to be there, you are being so judgy of them, they are just making money, they might enjoy it you judgemental SSWERF'.

so if youre a gay male and want a male sex worker, they actually suggest you try Gaydar and if youre a woman that wants sex with a man, you have to call them specifically, ie they dont really provide this service.

Its just an exploititave way of fleecing disabled people and exploiting women.

Disabled people generally are able to find sex, just maybe not with what they perceive as "high quality" women.

I don’t know what I’m supposed to have rewritten. I imagine the aim here is to pull apart my comment on consent not being for sale to prove me wrong in some way and I really can’t be arsed. No one thinks that the sex industry isn’t riddled with rape and exploitation. No one really believes that a woman freely chooses between cleaner and prostitute as totally equal choices or that the majority of prostitutes are well paid and well treated. I don’t think you can buy consent, I think men who pay for sex are contemptible. I don’t think the same of women who sell it.