To wonder what you think about people with disabilities buying sex

[huha]

Here is a link: tlc-trust.org.uk

I personally was at first 😲😲😲 but now am thinking 🤔...maybe this is a good thing?? AIBU?

If you believe all prostitution is wrong there is no point in discussion.I don't believe that

If an individual sex worker is happy, willing, well paid and well treated, it doesn’t change the fact that the sex industry as a thing is bad. Anything that drives demand drives the trafficking of women and children. Regardless of how ‘fine with it’ am individual worker is. So yes, I do think prostitution is bad, regardless of an individual who actively wants to participate in it.

Growing your own dope and having a medicinal joint isn’t bad in and of itself. The drugs industry remains a source of death, slavery and organised crime. So I think the drugs industry generally is bad, yes.

There is such a thing as ethical porn. That doesn’t change the fact that the vast majority of porn shows rape and abuse of women and the porn industry as a whole drives societal opinions of women that reduce them to holes to fuck. And al women suffer from that. So again, I think the porn industry is bad.

Not all white people are racist. That doesn’t change the fact that the western world and its power structures have long been set up to benefit white people over people of colour and white people (even the non racist ones) benefit from that.

This is a variation on the ‘not all men are like that’ argument - no not all men are violent misogynistic arseholes, but enough are that 98% of violent crime is committed by men and Male violence is a big issue.

Can you not see how the circumstances of an individual and the wider circumstances of society are not always the same?

Disabled people don’t get a pity pass. They’re members of society like everyone else and should be treated as such, not as poor incapable beings.

If you believe all prostitution is wrong there is no point in discussion.I don't believe that

And if you think prostitution is absolutely fine then there is no point in this discussion either

Lovemusic would you think it was a great idea and the demand was justified if it was your mother/sister/etc providing this service? Really, truly, could you be happy with it as a career choice for someone you care about?

@Lovemusic33

not being able to have intamacy and sex is a huge issue for many adults with sn’s and mental health issues, it causes frustration and makes them feel like they are not wanted

But knowing that the person woman had to be paid to have sex with you wouldn’t help you feel ‘wanted’.

I still haven't seen an example of a disability that would cause someone to be completely unable to meet people on their own, but that would conversely be absolutely fine with using a prostitute...?

Any example I can think of where someone is 100% incapable of meeting someone on their own, they'd be no more capable of asking for their sexual needs to be met.

Y'know there are a lot of people trafficked and working under poor conditions in the massage industry as well. So by some of the logic in this thread it's always wrong to pay for a massage. After all if anyone cared for you you'd get one from them only and they're not essential

Giving a massage isn’t the same as having sex. But obviously there are massage parlours acting as a front for brothels so I can see why you might be confused.

Well quite, giving a massage is often a far more intimate activity than the sort of sex prostitutes have. Google for the many news items about modern slavery in the nail bar industry in the UK by the way, even worse than in the massage industry as they've even introduced a licensing scheme to crack down on it. Hope noone gets their nails done if it's so black and white..

hang on - is someone claiming that the state pays for prostitutes intimate therapists to provide services??

" sex is a huge issue for many adults with sn’s and mental health issues, it causes frustration and makes them feel like they are not wanted"

The sex industry is a huge issue for many sex workers. It exploits and hurts them and makes them feel like they are not worthwhile.

Does that matter though?

How can giving a massage be more intimate than sex?

The point has been made already that people are exploited in various industries. That doesn’t make prostitution ok.

I've had a massage. Clearly I was semi naked. Other than that it wasn't intimate though

Disgusting. Women are not commodities

I can't believe this is getting so much traffic!

Women are not commodities!

No one will die from lack of sex.
It is perfectly possible for able bodied and disabled people to live with or without it!
It's nasty to think it's a 'service' that should be 'provided', for either able bodied or disabled people - it is not a 'human right'.

Bringing disability into any discussion about the necessity of using women as a commodity is wrong on so many levels!
Lets be clear - the comments here are not (in general) those of disabled people so it is a discussion that is discriminatory to both the disabledcommunity and to women.

I know several people have already said it, but surely non-disabled people who just can't meet someone struggle to get their sexual needs met. The bottom line is, sex is either a right or it isn't. It can't be a right for disabled people and not for others.

I think there are a few disabled women posting here?

women are not commodities it’s not just women, if you read the link they also provide men workers.

I know people have different views on the sex industries, there are people taking advantage of because of vunrability but do any of you know anyone who has worked in the sex industry? I know of several who are no way forced or made to feel they have no choice, they actually enjoy their job and the money it brings in (they don’t stand on street corners and they don’t just go with who ever waves cash at them).

It’s not just about men paying for sex, women pay for it too, there are make sex workers, are they being taken advantage of and being abused too?

Yes. HTH.

And what do you think the ratio is of male to female sex workers? What do you think the ratio is of male to female buyers of sex? To attempt to paint this as in any way equal between men and women is ludicrous.

I believe a survey by Mencap (the learning disabilities charity) suggested that whilst the majority of individuals with learning disabilities wanted to have a meaningful and physical relationship with another person, only 3% of individuals with LD actually lived together as partners (compared to over 70% of individuals in the general population). Some of the barriers faced by individuals with learning disabilities with respect to forming serious relationships include: lack of access to social activities; attitudes of carers; restrictions in residential care; financial constraints and so on. I should imagine similar factors may present barriers for individuals with other disabilites.

So, to me, the underlying question is: how can we overcome the barriers in society that mean individuals with disabilities (including learning disabilities and autism) find it so difficult to form long term romantic/sexual relationships.

Some strong views, but personally I have no issue with it. Where someone is being coerced then it's a different story and these people need help, but where they are not it's none of my business to judge.
What someone is willing to do with their money or with their body is for them to decide, not me.

to attempt to paint this as in any way equal between men and women is ludicrous

Absolutely

"To attempt to paint this as in any way equal between men and women is ludicrous."
And a classic pro prostitution and/or MRA response.

If the sex workers are happy and safe then why is it a problem.

The only thing that would bother me is companionship is just as important.

So, to me, the underlying question is: how can we overcome the barriers in society that mean individuals with disabilities (including learning disabilities and autism) find it so difficult to form long term romantic/sexual relationships.

^^ This.