To not want MiL to drink while babysitting

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My MiL looks after DD(2.5) once a week while I’m at work. She will send pictures to show what they’re up to, and I noticed in the most recent an empty bottle of wine and two glasses on the table. She was meeting her friend for lunch and they had a bottle between them, whilst she’s looking after her granddaughter.

One glass might be ok, I suppose, but half a bottle seems like a lot. When I mentioned it to DP, he said that it was ok because she drinks a lot normally so half a bottle isn’t a lot for her!

AIBU to be really cross that she’s had that much whilst in charge of my little one?

greenlynx
You are paying her -- her time with GDD is her reward

Still chortling at this! I'd sooner have a bottle of wine thanks!

SS in Sweden are very, very well funded and very active. I’ve seen referrals for parents shouting at kids.

Good gawd, is it any wonder that Sweden's educational results have gone down the toilet if this is the prevailing culture around children?

Sounds to me this country is busy creating a nation of spoilt brats.

You are paying her -- her time with GDD is her reward.

I was reading that as her time with GOD and thinking, wow that's weird. Then i realised it was GDD and still think it's weird.

Newsflash: The UK is not Sweden. I can only imagine the hue and cry if the government tried to pattern itself on the model with the requisite tax increases. Haahaahaaa!

As long as she wasn't drunk then I wouldn't have a problem.
I drink a bottle a night and I'm perfectly fine. I don't get drunk or get hangovers as I have a high tolerance.

Bloodyhell the level of hysteria on mn gets worse by the day. OP saw a photo of an empty bottle of wine on a table where her MIL had lunch. She hasn't spoken to mil, she has no idea if she drank any of the wine at all, let alone how many glasses and how drunk she may or may not be. And just because a restaurant gives you a large glass doesn't mean you are going to fill it.

Oh, happy, don your flameproof suit!

Defiantly SGB for pm.

I have just messaged both my dils saying my reward is the company of my grandchildren. Waiting for their replies.

Both probably think I have been at the wine already mind if I had dils like some of the posters here I would be and have emigrated too. thankfully I raised normal kids who married normal and delightful other people

Oh Happy that was a brave post are you 40 or over? If so do you think you may have dementure?

happy you will die tomorrow. So enjoy the wine .

expat

icantcope
If anyone drank a drop while in charge of my child, they'd never be in charge of my child ever again

What even a little sample they give out at Asda or John Lewis? Way to go cut your nose off to spite your face!

Any problem that’s an emergency is going to require an ambulance anyway and anything else you can easily get a taxi/Uber.

I don't think the driving thing is the important issue - it's more the fact that if someone is not deemed legally able to control a vehicle, how can they be deemed able to be responsible for a child? I have this mortifying image of a child being injured and the guardian in tow breathing alcohol fumes over/slurring in front of the doctors. It is not a good image.

If people want to drink with their own children or don't mind their parents/ILs doing it, that's their business. To act like not doing that makes someone a martyr is bullshit and judgemental (and sounds overly defensive). Is someone a martyr if they don't drink for 9 months of their pregnancy?! No, they are usually very happily just making a minor sacrifice for the good of their child.

Also dillydillydally

Slightly off-topic but I completely agree with your last post - there was a time when a child learning to sit and behave whilst adults talked was an important (albeit boring) part of growing up. Nowadays everyone shoves an ipad in their children's hands, so that they learn they must ALWAYS be entertained, and aren't able to just sit quietly.

'What even a little sample they give out at Asda or John Lewis? Way to go cut your nose off to spite your face!'

Booth's on a Saturday! Samples, samples, samples!

Racecardriver - how many children get lost, injured and die each year on the public transport system? and how many of those are linked to the responsible adult having had a drink? Do you actually know?

I"m sorry, this does seem overblown. But maybe that's the internet for you!

Ohmydays

One of them's probably my DM! 😂

God this thread gets funnier by the post!

Now the mil is slurring in the doctors face while the child lays injured!!! On 2 glasses of wine with lunch.

Honestly how do some people cope in the real world.

That huge stick up their arse must hurt.

if anyone drank a drop in charge of my child they would never be in charge again I bet your mil/dm are breathing a sigh of relief as they sip on a cold white.

Seriously get a grip

Perfectly

Where is this Booths you speak of expat is it in Scotland??

'if anyone drank a drop in charge of my child they would never be in charge again I bet your mil/dm are breathing a sigh of relief as they sip on a cold white.'

No, it's in N. England. There was one near a caravan park we stayed at in the Lake District. Oooo, the samples!

Some people are quite fine after half a bottle and truth be told would probably still be able to drive a lot better than other drivers who are just naturally shit at it or inexperienced/nervous etc. Cars these days would be a tonne in average. Best not to have a naturally shit and/or inexperienced driver hop in one and be in charge of a huge mass of moving metal after even one glass. As there is no way to distinguish who is who there is a blanket rule for all and rightly so.

This is very different to looking after a child if you have drunk an amount of alcohol where you can still function quite adequately. For some people that’s half a bottle. For others it’s not even a sip. So, knowing what you can handle in that regard provides the common stick measurement.

Also, I have been in the situation quite a few times of seeing a parent who has had a few glasses (not drunk) who presents with an injured child. I honestly can’t recall any one of those cases where the parent was ‘the cause/responsible for’ of the child’s injury. Mainly things that occur at BBQ’s where backyard cricket or soccer game is taking place with kids and kid gets hit with ball, trips over and breaks arm, twists ankle etc. Things that would happen whether alcohol is present or not. Usually they get a lift in with someone there who wasn’t drinking ir a neighbour. In these cases I certainly never judged or thought badly of anyone. In actual fact most of those parents are preferable to ones were stone cold sober but natural fuckwits. Of course if a child had injuries that were a result of abusive/negligent parenting involving alcohol/drugs or not I certainly reported but what is described above, nope.

sweeney

I have a friend whose DD, then aged 5, overheard him singing 10 Sticks of Dynamite. She duly sang it at school. The last lines are as follows:

There'd be no sticks of dynamite
And no fucking wall.

😂

• sense not stick ...also just general phone typing fails, the device hates me.

Imagine your dc had an accident and she couldn't take them to hospital...

Imagine taxis and ambulances didnt exist....