I am an independent, strong professional woman (and always have been) and when I met my DH (3 years younger than me) in the early 1990's, he was a low-earning worker on an apprenticeship. He was earning £55 a week (around £120 in today's money,) and he spent two thirds of his weeks wage on taking me out on our first date.
He took me to a club, he bought me drink after drink (even though I kept offering to buy a round, he insisted it was fine) and he took me for coffee after (at an all night diner,) and then drove me home to my door. I asked if he wanted anything towards the club entry and the drinks, and he said 'no no no, it's fine, maybe you can get us a coffee when we meet for lunch in the week ...' We did meet and I did buy the coffees.
I knew from that moment (that he spent two thirds of his weekly wage on me, trying to impress me even though he was quite poor and earning much less than me) that he was 'the one.' Call me old fashioned, I don't give a fuck to be honest, but the fact this man was so smitten with me that he pulled out all the stops to impress me, won me over big time.
And as I said, I paid next time (for lunch) and it was his birthday 3 weeks after our first date, and I spent £35 on him (in the early 1990's more like £70 now!) and he was bowled over by the fact I had bought him such a lovely gift, so soon after first dating him.
I don't think men should pay for everything always, but yes, it is nice, and a good sign, when they want to treat you on the first date. It sets the tone imo. If a man asked me on a date, and then insisted on calculating what we had both spent (down to the last penny,) made me pay my own way into a club and then insisted on paying half each for the taxi, I probably would be massively put off, and no, I would not see him again. That, to me, would be a sign he is a stingy cunt.
In my experience (and that of many women I know,) a man who is tight and mean on a first date and insists on paying only for what HE has consumed, is not going to be some kind, thoughtful, gentlemanly, chivalrous darling later on in your relationship, who will see you through thick and thin.
He will always be as tight as a duck's arse, he will always keep HIS money to himself, and when you are a stay-at-home-mum (or go part time,) and you are responsible for looking after the kids, you will struggle to get any money out of him to look after the house and kids, as he will see the money he earned as his.
I have seen many a woman I know with a man like this, and after raising the children for a few years, he insists she goes back to work full time, and brings extra money in, but he does fuck-all in the house and rarely looks after the kids, as he still sees it has 'her job' even though she is working (full time) now too.
A man who is tight on the first date, is almost certainly going to be tight forever more, and is not going to be a great life partner.
I know that won't sit well with some on here, but it's true. A man who is mean on a first date, will not be a life affirming, kind, considerate, generous man, who will carry you when you earn less than him and are struggling. He will be way more likely to keep his pennies to himself and tell you that you should have worked harder to get a better job.
I know half a dozen couples where the man is earning more, and he NEVER pays for the woman, and insists they pay half for everything; meals out, food, bills, everything... and she struggles to make ends meet, whilst he squanders his money on frivolous crap and lives the life of Riley. Three of the couples are married, and it's such an unpleasant sight to witness.
Fortunately I have not been cursed with a man like that, and am in a relationship where he gives, and cares, and loves me, and has carried me when I needed him to, with NO complaints.
And I have always done the same for him............