...to ask about headscarf etiquette?

[HoneyBadgerApparently]

Do Muslim women who chose to wear a headscarf wear it at home?

And if you don’t wear it at home, is it something you look forward to whipping off the minute you walk through the door before you get comfy (like I do with my bra )

Asking purely out of curiosity.

Not generally worn at home in front of family or female friends. Usually put back on if unrelated males visit.

Yes yes yes to your second question! (I feel the same way about my bra too.)

Most Muslim women wouldn't wear it at home, unless they were living with an guy who wasn't related to them e.g. student halls, house shares etc. The only other time I can think of when a Muslim women would wear her headscarf at home would be if she lived with her in law's/extended family and her husband's brothers lived there too. They aren't allowed to see her hair, hence the headscarf. Otherwise most women I know whip it off as soon as they get a chance!

Hmm I quite often don't bother to take it off if I'm going out again within an hour or two or if I'm pottering about as I tend to go out into the garden etc. I don't find it uncomfy or annoying apart from when I have worn it all day and then go straight round to someone's house, for example, but then I feel like that about my jeans

There's a woman at my work who wears a headscarf in the street but takes it off on the office. I've always wondered about that as there are men she doesn't know in the office too. But I think she just wears it in te street as she is very shy.

Thank you. A muslim family has moved in across the street and I swear tonight I saw the mum pulling at her scarf as she walked through the door, I don't know why this hasn't occurred to me before

Also any tips on a moving in present please, I usually take round a bottle of wine but of course will not do that! DH suggests some homemade muffins but I'm veggie and don't always like accepting homemade stuff in case lard is used so assume this would be the same if on a halal diet? Maybe just some chocolates?

If its written at home while you are praying (even if you don't normally wear a headscarf you are supposed to cover your hair while praying) or if there are make visitors. Generally soaking there are two reasons why Muslim women wear them 1. Because you are supposed to do it when you pray and 2. Because they have internalised the notion that they are somehow responsible for the way that men react to their bodies /they are forced to do it to 'protect their modesty'. One is a religious custom akin to women wearing hats in church and the other is a result of misogyny.

Muffins sound fine. Who would use lard for muffins anyway?

I've always thought it would be nice to hide my hair under a head scarf. They look so elegant compared to many women's hair

As a student I roomed with a Muslim family and the only time I saw the wife wearing a scarf was when she was reading from the Koran. I assumed it was a respect thing, would be interested if anyone can confirm this. She just reached over and picked up a glittery orange scarf and put it on before starting to read.

Hmm... I'm not religious but my DM is catholic, my great-aunt is a nun. Even when I've visited DGA in the female only retirement convent she has worn her habit, as have all the other (retired) nuns. And I've never heard a catholic criticised for it. Seems like a bit of a double standard.

@carefreeeee my DM side is Irish and use lard for everything .

I think we'll do muffins and label them veggie.

Also any tips on a moving in present please

Houseplant? Outdoor plant?

Sorry earlier comment was @racecardriver not people taking scarves off at home!

BetteDavis great idea, I have like 50 cacti if they like it I might have made a new friend

I would take flowers and a Welcome to your New Home card

Can I ask a nosy question, too? Is it terribly hot wearing a headscarf and do you get used to it? I teach Muslim girls who wear one and this week has been baking in school. It feels too intrusive/offensive to say to them, 'aren't you sweating in a headscarf'? But I find myself wondering whether they are struggling away. (I'm menopausal and baking in a thin shirt - I couldn't bear to have my hair wrapped up too!)

My neighbour chats to me (a woman) over the back fence without hers on , also if DS who’s 8 is running around.

Once or twice she’s come out to talk to DH and she always has it on then.

I took chocolates and a houseplant to my new Muslim neighbours. They've put the plant on the side in the kitchen that faces our house
They also bring round baklava for last Eid! (Obviously my favourite neighbours now even if DH ate it all without me)

they should not at home or not as there is no requirement in the quran to cover the head either with a burqa or niqab

*brought

@honey bagdger but that is no different, i critisise i and Catholism are the same in my eyes, extremely unenlightened. Most people I know cosier Catholism out dated and sexist. Many would go as far as to say that the reformation was the best thing to Halen to Europe (I certainly think so). No one is (or was at this point) taking about Catholism because this thread wasn't about that. Maybe you don't talk about Catholism enough in general?

@blessyourcottonsock I never flubd it hpt-you can wear it loosely and choose suitable material.

Both muslim men and women cover their hair while praying but most women don’t wear a tight hijab at home.

Also a lot of muslim women wear bandanas, scarves, or hair / head pieces instead of hijabs.

racecardriver where do you draw the line? Is walking about with a bra on a result of misogyny? Is choosing a longer length skirt because I dont want all of my legs out a result of misogyny?

I think its a bit more complicated than that. Not everyones desire to dress in a certain way stems from what men may or may not think of them.
I think its massive double standards when many women in the UK certainly would not go braless if they had a large chest as they feel breasts are a sexual characteristic and to have their nipples visible would be rude and/or disrespectful in some environments.

Hair can also easily be viewed as a secondary sexual characteristic.

No Muslim don't cover their hair when praying.

@racecardriver I was trying to say that I don't think I or anyone else has the right to comment on a religious person's personal relationship with their God, or how they choose to show their respects. I used Catholicism because that is the only religion I have personal experience of (and therefore feel qualified to discuss), though I don't follow it/ haven't had my children baptised.

Many religious people choose to cover hair as a sign of worship. Catholic nuns, married conservative Jewish women, Sikh men, Muslim women. And yet it seems to me that it is predominantly Muslim women who are in criticised for this or told they are internalising misogyny etc instead of choosing to follow their religion and pursue their relationship with their God in the way they say fit.

I was attempting to have a lighthearted conversation and learn about another persons culture, not encourage criticism of a strangers beliefs.