To ask just how do you make it all work?? Life admin etc.

[NameChangeTimeNow]

Sort of inspired by the ‘perfect friend’ thread.

How do you keep on top of different aspects of your life and have time for it all? How do you make it work for you? Would really appreciate some constructive advice please!!

E.g. how do you keep on top of your job (if you work) as well as staying on top of housework and life admin? How do you even deal with life admin? Do you just make a massive to-do list of random bits and bobs and force yourself to stick to it and get through it?

...And how do you then make time for things like having a social life and doing things you enjoy?

I get really bored on these threads of people who don't have much 'life admin' to do themselves, therefore no one else could possibly have any to do, unless they're doing it wrong

I promise you, for my family, in our situation, I have about an hour of admin to do per day (I don't mind this by the way, I have time to sort).

Today, I did the following admin;

1. Filled in form and paid via school gateway for dd1 school trip (5 mins)
2. Ordered 3 x outfits for dd2s forthcoming ballet show (20 mins)
3. Organised new passport for dd1 (20 mins)
4. Organised logistics for a swim gala dd1 is attending in a few weeks and filled in relevant form (10 mins).

Tomorrow I will have different things to do.

Rather obviously, if you don't have children you wouldnt have had to do any of the above, neither would you if your children don't go on school trips, do ballet, go abroad, or swim.
But it surely isn't that much of a stretch of the imagination, to understand that other families do.

@Furano see above post by arethereanyleftatall

LADIES! PLEASE SEE THIS ISN’T A GENUINE POST. Only 2 previous posts and both seem to be the same of asking thoughts and opinions. I know this is what mumsnet is for but OP will usually be commenting throughout. That’s not the case and it hasn’t been previously. We are giving free information and personal experiences for the sake of a tabloid

Oh ffs, I think you're right @Fuckitletshavevino

Never mind, it's nice to share experiences nevertheless.

@arethereanyleftatall it really is but I think we need to start a new thread without the daily fail

I’m full time teacher, run a family business and have a 7 yr old... I organised everything... I have to do lists & use every spare minute!

I have a 2 yr old and a 5 month old. The only way I can keep on top of the housework is The Organised Mum Method (TOMM) Search it on instagram, it’s fab!

recklessgran Your 15 min idea is genius!!

My people!

I never usually placemark but I want to carry on reading this.. when I'm less busy! 🤣

With difficulty.

I work 5 days a week, 4 days from the office so out the house for 12 hours a day and have a DS (4). My house is always a tip which means I have to tidy it before I clean (I realise this is a ridiculous waste of time and I should just keep it tidy but it's not in my DNA) and then I hate gardening but weirdly can't bear for it to be a mess so slightly obsess about that.

I do have piles of papers everywhere and then periodically have a clear out and then also have bagged up stuff to take to the charity shop which I become blind to after a while.

Essentially it is all a bit of a struggle .....

Having a cleaner not only helps because of the cleaning she does but also because it makes us have a massive tidy up once a week before she comes.
The juggling is all so much easier this year now that both my DCs are at school full time and I've remained on 4 days per week.
As a PP said, everything gets done through teamwork between me and DH, even though he works long hours. We both appreciate the other's need to fulfil interests a couple of times a week - music for me and fitness for him.
We're knackered and sex often takes a back seat but life seems to work and we all feel fulfilled.
And yes to the big family calendar on the kitchen wall - we have a brilliant Gruffalo one with stickers.

Never iron - low spin, hang damp
Amazon prime for gifts etc
One type of wrapping paper
Greeting cards - buy ahead
Shared phone calender
online food shop
Batch cook
Kids put away their washing, as does DP- they have a pod each
like this
Spray mop combined with floor wipes
Gtech carpet sweeper - but I'm hankering after cordless dyson
Fluffy dusters
Clean bathroom while kids in bath
Mircrofibre cloths for practically any cleaning job

2 kids, I'm a childminder and inherently lazy

Slow declutter - it helps

lots of baskets of shit

I see we are running with the tabloids then 😂😂.

My house is a shithole as in clutter wherever is acceptable, I moved 5 months ago and still haven’t finished unpacking. I don’t have a partner or dishwasher or cleaner or nanny/childminder to help me. I do it all single handily like most single mums. I feel like telling the previous posters that have outside help and or partners to fuck off and try doing it alone. But I’d be wrong for that naturally

I use the daily fail to wipe my arse.

I work on call 24/7, own business. DH works from home,sometimes odd hours for clients in different time zones.

Difficult to plan activities/meals but we do use most of the methods pp have suggested.

Spend as much time with DC as we can, prioritise that above anything else. I realised life is not about ironing duvet covers...if the sun is out, take DC to the park, the dishes can wait if DH and I are engaged in a conversation about UK Grime artists.
It might not work for everyone and it might take time for you to get into doing what works for your household...small changes each day,delegate what needs doing, prioritise according to what matters to you. Pinterest is great for tips/printouts. YouTube has great organisation/cooking/cleaning rota videos you can watch while you sort clothes/iron.

Good luck OP

Haven't caught up on this thread for a few days as I've been too busy The thing with life admin is when it's just the odd bit that crops up now and then you can do it as and when, but when you have (several) kids, pets, house, health conditions, renovations, groups your part of, etc, it builds up and you have to plan and make time for when you do it.

You may say, "but that only takes a couple of minutes, do it now!" But when you have 15 things that only take a couple of minutes and five of them are more urgent and you have to get DD's hair done and take her to school and then go straight to work, it takes organisation.

Thank you PPs for filling me in about children’s homework. I had no idea it started that young now and I quite see how parents would have to help to get their children going. Well done all the amazing mommas on this thread! I’m a bit daunted, hope I can do as good a job.

@Fuckitletshavevino the Fail read most threads on here anyway, so starting a new one won't make any difference.

But I don't see why people get so het up about it. Anything you write on here could appear in the papers, regardless of who started the thread.

I am constantly chasing my own backside! The house work, three teenage children, full time student, part time job, two dogs, and a husband that does absolutely nothing to help - he simply swans off to the pub! Can't remember the last time I had time to myself! I start at 6.30am and I do not stop until I go to bed at 11.30- 12am!

I have no problems with journalists reading MN at all. As for letshavevinvo above yes I agree it is very hard without help. One my posts talked about when we had 3 under 4, no cleaner, both working full time and up half the night breastfeeding the baby plus 3 in cloth nappies at night. I did then have a husband. However as a single mother later it was certainly easier with a cleaner by then.

Fuckitletshavevino. I save a lot of time by not reading rubbishy newspapers. Free or not, straight to recycling.

Desperatehousewife18. Can remember being advised when buying my first dog “a dog should go to a house that needs a dog not a house that wants a dog”. You need two dogs like you need a hole in the head. However if it’s one or the other I would get rid of DH!

I do sometimes make it work, I don't often - but I am kind to myself. I have learned to let things go - I rarely iron, I don't get too het up if a friend comes round and it's not as clean or tidy as I would like, we sometimes have sandwiches for dinner if I haven't managed anything else. Some things that help are paying bills, filling out any school forms, etc. as soon as they come in - otherwise they get lost in the general hubbub of things. Don't say yes to invitations you don't really want to but take time to enjoy the ones you do accept (you feel so much better for it), and send grandparents to school events you aren't too fussed about. I'm not good at routine, but it's fine once you embrace it - if that's the case. I find I have to work with when I feel energised - so might get loads done one evening and pretty much nothing the next. Smart phones are genius for getting little jobs done in small pockets of time also - we start an online shop then DH, kids and I add to it during our breaks at work / school / other spare moments. Booking tickets etc similarly, researching and ordering bits and bobs. My slow cooker is also a life saver - nothing feels so good as having dinner on the go before the day has hardly started!

Very helpful thread, thanks everyone - I think we're doing everything we should be, but things still fall through the cracks with alarming regularity.

Am slightly irritated at people not having the perspective to understand why others might find these things challenging.